Feeling harassed after personal conflict.

[Roseinatub]

A few months ago, I made a mistake and said something hurtful about someone I was upset with. It wasn’t said to their face, but it was still wrong, and I regret it. Unfortunately, it may now have legal consequences for me.

I’ve already spoken with a solicitor, who is helping me with the legal side of things. That part isn’t resolved yet, but I feel somewhat reassured that there’s a way to handle it.

The bigger issue right now is that this person and their family have been repeatedly contacting me for almost a month — showing up at my home, my workplace, my partner’s home and work, and sending messages. They’ve been making comments that strongly imply they’ll “make everything public” to humiliate me. While they’re not making direct threats, the pressure feels intense and intimidating.

I agreed to meet the person to talk things through and offered several dates, but none suited them. Since then, they’ve been insisting I meet them only on their terms and timelines. It now feels like they are more interested in punishment and revenge rather than resolution.

I’m feeling harassed and unsure what to do next. My main concerns are:

1. Protecting myself and my family from ongoing harassment.

1. Avoiding making the legal situation worse.

1. Understanding what steps I can take if this continues (e.g., reporting to the police or seeking another legal route).

Has anyone dealt with a situation like this before? What practical steps should I take to stop the harassment while keeping myself safe legally and emotionally?

Did you post recently about this? It rings a bell.
Can you make any of the times/dates they’ve suggested to meet up and discuss? Have you apologised?

Ask them to attend a mediation session with you. Neutral territory and helpful to both, ask them to decide on the date and then stick to it.

Ask them to attend a mediation session with you. Neutral territory and helpful to both, ask them to decide on the date and then stick to it.

What on earth did you say for such a reaction! It can’t have been that bad.. I would meet them on their terms and timelines. Least you can do if was really that terrible!

Without being too identifying, what was said? I mean are they suing you for libel? Have they reported you to your employer or professional body? I think you need to link in very carefully with your legal team around this and it depends on the likelihood of you being sued. Lots of people threaten libel proceedings but it is so expensive to do that I think it is often an empty threat.

I would be inclined to write a letter to say that you regret what was said, that you have attempted to meet to discuss and resolve the issue but unfortunately this has not been possible due to their unavailability. I would also include that whilst it is understandable that they feel upset about the situation, them and their family turning up to your home and workplace is not appropriate and if it continues you would consider it harassment.

BUT without knowing all the ins and outs of what was actually said, what legal action they are taking, I would do or say anything until you have run it past your team.

It's quite hard to think of something one might say in anger that results in legal ramifications.

Without outing yourself, I think youre going to have to give more information if you want help and advice.

Especially as from what you posted, you seem to the the aggressor

Understanding what steps I can take if this continues (e.g., reporting to the police or seeking another legal route)

Is it not threatening and harassment already? Why can’t you go to the police now?

You have legal advice so I would ask your solicitor. They are sometimes good at the ‘non-legal’ relationship management side of things too.

I suspect trying to directly engage with this individual is not a good idea. Your instinct may be right that they aren’t interested in resolution but only revenge and restitution.

People make mistakes and do and say ill advised things.

If it’s something like (guessing here) leaving a negative review for a service or responding to a customer’s negative review then I definitely would not engage with the individual in person any further. If it’s something like this, their actions of turning up randomly at friends and family locations are clearly harassment.

Actually … I’m struggling to think of a situation where turning up at workplaces, partners’ workplaces, friends and family homes would not constitute harassment.

I think disengaging is the way forward. Let your solicitor handle the legal side; they seem a bit unhinged.

This sounds really distressing, and awful to have hanging over you. Without meeting you, they’re not giving you an opportunity to remedy the situation. However, if it is so serious that you’re taking legal advice, I would not go near them nor communicate further without being crystal clear what you ought to - and not ought to - say. Something could be used against you (eg if they record you or negatively interpret anything in writing.) Do you think they are looking for some sort of damages or financial restitution?

Is what you said so bad that you can't go and tell your boss? They don't sound very nice or reasonable so I can see why you might've been tempted to say something bad about them. Take their power away and just tell people what happened ( I know nothing about law so don't do this if it impacts the legal case).

Why don't you ask your solicitor ? Anything you do could prejudice your legal case if you have one in progress

No one can comment without far more information, such as whether whatever you said was slander, for instance, but you need to talk to your solicitor if there’s an ongoing legal case.

This is your third thread OP, have you still not had a conversation with them?