Keeping a secret from dd (a nice one!)

[Peteryourhorseisheree]

Dd is 12 and absolutely loves a particular band. Dh is a huge fan too, so she’s loved them since she was tiny. Like properly loves them. They were the sole reason she wanted to learn guitar and piano since she was little, so she could play their songs, which she does, constantly.

They are doing a gig in our closest city next March and since she heard, she has had a countdown for tickets being on sale today.

Now, as dh is a huge fan of them too and he managed to get pre sale tickets two days ago for them both to go.

We are going to give them to dd as a Christmas present. The presale ones come with a limited edition vinyl and art work which the will love, and the tickets really weren’t cheap. It is her main Christmas present (and my husbands!)

Come Christmas morning, she will be thrilled. A double bonus is that the gig is on her birthday.

Dh is going to tell her tonight that he couldn’t get them, but that we will try and get them closer to the time when people are selling them on - by that time, Christmas will have been and gone anyway and she will have them.

I just feel so shit as she loves them, seeing them live is her little dream! She’ll be gutted tonight thinking we couldn’t get tickets.

So glad you have decided to tell her.

I honestly think that's the best thing all round.

Take some pleasure seeing her excited face when you tell her this evening and think how horrible it would have been having to wait until Christmas to see it!! 😊

He’s in the office now spending his lunch hour making and printing a Gorillaz card for her!

She really will be thrilled.

My MIL is going with them too. She’s literally the coolest 74 year old I’ve ever met. Shes coming to My Chemical Romance with me at Wembley next year (dd doesn’t like them which is awful!) and I had to beg her not to get standing tickets for the sake of my back 🤣

Awesome! 😁

Let us know how the surprise goes.

Your MIL sounds so cool. I love a good gig but I think even I would have trouble keeping up with her 😂

We lied for months about Coldplay! She’ll move on after the initial disappointment and then she’ll be thrilled.

Best idea by far!

This is what I was going to suggest.

I’d probably say something vague and jokey about you will have to see what Father Christmas brings. So she will know you got them and then the special tickets with the vynyl will be a surprise

I think when she asks if you got them you should say

You'll have to wait and see what Santa brings 😉

So she knows that she's getting them but she still gets a half surprise at Christmas and has to wait for absolute confirmation.

I see that has been suggested a few times 🤣

Ah, don’t get me sitting back on that fence again!

We’ve made the decision now to tell her. We were both thinking about it all morning.

Mainly because one day, there will be a gig we genuinely can’t get a ticket for. I wouldn’t want her to think we were lying and be living in hope that a ticket was going to pop out at Christmas.

And this really is a special band for her. Both dh and MIL are massive Gorillaz fans, so she’s heard them constantly from when she was born. She used to talk about them at preschool to a teacher who likes them too (and thought it was very cute), and paint pictures of 2D there.

So it’s not a new thing like Harry Styles was, it’s really important to her. She genuinely loves the music.

(She’s also had me playing My Chemical Romance and Green Day at her since the day she was born and will not be persuaded to like them, so I am a little bit gutted about that).

That's so sweet of him to be so excited about it.
I think you've made the right decision as misleading her would upset her and may also lead to trust issues further down the line.

I like the fact that there will still be the limited edition vinyl and art work for her to open at Christmas too.

Was going to say exactly this. Saying you couldn’t get them is just mean.

Yes, I always said that, still do 🎅🏻😄

Glad you’ve decided to tell her, keep us posted.

They are at college age! Very cool band for older kids.
Please don't do this to her OP, let her be excited for the foreseeable instead of so disappointed. A much nicer emotion to bask in 😁

dh wants to give her the card with a print out of the ticket email in it when she gets home.

Only, I am picking her up from school. It’s a 30
min drive home, so I am going to have say I haven’t had a chance to ask dad about them today, he’s been in meetings all day, and change the subject sharpish, as it will be the first thing that comes out of her mouth when she sees me!

A good idea.

And I would posit that quite a lot of 12 year old girls are into Gorillaz - DD and some of her friends were at that age.

I'm glad you've decided to tell her. Not a good model to lie to your kids. I think if she had genuinely thought she wasn't going and had moved on from it and then was told she was going after all she might think it's another 'joke'. She'd need time to absorb it rather than being immediately excited.

They are in year 7. She’s 11, they aren’t older kids.

Christ, I just read my OP and I said she was 12, my mistake. I aged her as the gig is on her 12th birthday next March, being 12 years old was obviously on my mind, she’s 11.

None of her friends have heard of them. Her primary school friends aren’t interested if dd talks about them, or don’t like them when she’s played them the music. Her new friends at secondary school haven’t heard of them either. If dd was on mastermind, Gorillaz and Blur would be her specialist subject.

Her best mate saw a video of Damon at a recent gig and said, “ew, who’s that gross old fella?” Which offended me and dd eqaully (Damon was my teenage crush 🤣)

We did this for our son for Oasis tickets and it was amazing! He has said that he was so glad we kept it a secret until Christmas.

Nah, that's as good as saying yes but in a dangling carrot, not going to confirm kind of way, which in this house would mean constant badgering, whingeing and questions, leading to an anticlimax at Christmas. 😐

I think you've made the right choice OP.

It would be different if you'd said no from the start and then got them as a present, but to let her get her hopes up and then lie to her is different and not worth the excitement on Christmas Day.

Plus now she's got an extra three months of excitement!

My parents did this to my sister on Christmas Day when she was around 10. Yes, she was disappointed at the time (and mad at my mum), but on Christmas morning she was ecstatic- her face is still one of the best memories I have from Christmas as a child!

I'd tell her - you have tickets, basic ones on X date - half the fun of an event is the 'looking forward to it' I book my big holidays 18 months in advance

She will be excited to know whether its today or Christmas Day. Don't be mean to her - she will have another 3 months of looking forward to it.

Let her know tonight she's having her Christmas present early.

The paper tickets can still be her Christmas present due to the cost. Or, if you can keep the special add ons separate then give those on Christmas Day (but she probably knows they come with pre sale too).

But don't lie just because of some silly over commercialised date.

We got presale tickets to gorillaz too for DD's birthday in October, considered keeping it secret but have told her. She's so excited - some of her friends have tickets too.