Absolutely bonkers shop assistant

[Hummingbirdtree]

I am abroad on holiday. I ventured into a women’s clothing shop that I have visited before, and really should have known better because the owner is a very very full on salesperson. This time she took it to a whole other level. She insists on selecting clothes that she thinks I will like in a very overbearing way. Doesn’t let me look at anything or choose anything myself .I feel extremely pressured and agree to try these things on even though I know I don’t want them. She insists on me leaving the curtain open ! Other customers come into the shop so I close the curtains. She then comes INTO the changing room without asking with me in my underwear and starts tugging at the clothes . Absolutely mortifying. I left without buying anything but felt quite angry and violated. I just couldn’t bring myself to tell her that I didn’t feel comfortable with her in the changing room or leaving the curtain open to watch me. I really understand how abuse happens, I just felt unable to voice my discomfort.
What would you have done?

I would have left the shop.

I would have loudly told her I’d choose things myself and to not come into the changing room. If she didn’t listen I’d have walked out.

I would walk out once the weirdness began.

Why can't you say no thank you, bring yourself to tell her that you didn’t feel comfortable with her in the changing room or leaving the curtain open to watch you? Worth unpicking why you feel powerless to voice your discomfort.

Yes, Im quire shocked at myself. It’s really made me think.

An opportunity to plan how to respond if anything like this happens again. Plan the exact words you'd say if someone acts like this again.
And if you've had enough: "No thank you, I'm leaving now". And if she blathers on, gets shirty, asks you why- just repeat "No thank you, I'm leaving now".

If it seemed like it was a cultural difference, I would have just gone along with it (except the curtain open bit). I'm not that body conscious and I'd have been out of my comfort zone but I wouldn't have felt violated by what you describe. But if it had been something that did feel like a violation, as has happened a couple of times on my travels, I would put my hand out as a physical barrier and say something like: No. I'm not comfortable with that/We don't do that./I'm not doing that./ I don't want that. etc.

I've definitely ended up doing things I would rather not in other cultures. Never anything that left me feeling traumatized, but it was a few experiences that I realised I'd gone along with that could have turned bad that made me learn and use the hand out, say "No" technique. I practiced it a few times on my own and I think that made it easier to do when it came to the crunch.

Could you or she speak the same language ? Communicate well ?
Perhaps it was the very British trait of 'not wanting to make a fuss'

Yes she spoke excellent English . I was just so stunned that I didn’t know how to react. I’m now angry at myself, but yes, a good opportunity to practice what I wouod say in future.