Shocked at partners rage!!?? AIBU

[diandee]

This morning, everything was fine.
He was going out and I was stood with my gone cold coffee in my dressing gown and he went to kiss/ hug me goodbye and it nudged my hand and my drink slightly spilled on the side of his top honestly wasn’t bad at all. I said sorry didn’t mean to.

he was furious!!! I said it will dry n it will come out etc.
he’s gone out in a vile vile mood sending me endless texts that I don’t respect him or his things? And that he takes pride in his appearance and I’ve completely destroyed his day and his mood???
he said he’ll throw coffee on me n see how I like it???
I did not chuck my drink on him.
im so upset. The abuse im getting from this is just crazy.

what do I do?

People seem to use the word ‘partner’ when they’ve known someone a hot minute. If this is the case, OP, and he’s just a boyfriend, dump him - don’t hesitate. This is not just a flash of temper, he’s escalating a non-incident via text, trying to blame and shame you. Being around an angry man who’s on a hair trigger the entire time and irrationally loses his shit every 5 minutes is no way to live (ask me how I know), so don’t waste another minute of your time on this fucking idiot.

If you’ve been together years and he’s acting completely out of character (although it doesn’t sound like it), maybe it’s worth a conversation when he’s calmed down, to find out what’s really going on that’s triggered this mantrum.

But if he’s just an arsehole who’s entrenched in your life - you live together or have shared financial interests - you may need to extricate yourself more carefully. Getting out should definitely be your end game, though, because he’s showing you who he is, and his treatment of you is only going to go one way from here.

He's absolutely vile. Literally sounds like a dangerous maniac. If you were a bloke he'd chin you?! Well that says it all really.

Pathetic cunt. Block him and do not let him back in your house. If he harasses you tell the police he's threatening and aggressive.

He's a lunatic. FGS tell him the relationship is over. Why would you tolerate this level of abuse and threats from anyone?

He’s an abusive arsehole. This type gets worse - never, ever better. You can’t change him by reasoning with him. You’re his punching bag.

Hard LTB

Who's house is it?

Given your second post I'd be changing the fucking locks.

He sounds rotten to the core.

Maybe one day he won’t care. Time to leave. You’re worth more than this.

He sounds nuts

This is a mentally ill reaction from him. He is in need of mental health support.

He told you he would punch a man because he knocked a coffee cup and spilled it on himself. Don't wait until something actually goes wrong and you are the one being punched.

Who’s he gone out to meet?
Why does it matter if there’s a small stain on him?

This is not normal behaviour at all. He's sounds dangerous and I think you need to think seriously about leaving.

Talk to Women's Aid for advice.

Why are you supposed to be responsible for the fact that he spilt the coffee??

What a nasty angry buffoon, enormous overreaction on his part. I would not want to spend another day with a muppet like this.

Well he's an abusive twat.
Don't you deserve more? Or has he ground you down so you feel grateful he's with you?

He needs to go. Sorry.

That would be a straw that broke the camels back for me, especially the chinning comment 😵… I’d tell him to not bother coming home … really ruin his day!

Please leave

Is it your house? I would be rethinking his place in it..

I not disputing op needs to end this relationship and move on
but locking someone out is literally lighting the touch paper no quicker way to escalate things

and more to the point you can’t just go locking people out of there home

This man does not care about you or want you to feel loved.

He wants to be in a relationship where he holds the power and you scurry round desperately trying to make him happy, destroying yourself in the process.

That is no way to live. Please find a way to end the relationship so you can be around peope who treat you with the kindness and respect you would offer to them.

Shame it wasnt hot.

get rid of this piece of shit.s