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Moving school year 4

2 replies

theLadyWhoJumpsHigh · 11/09/2025 00:03

So my daughter is in Year 4 and was reasonably happy at her school. She didn't have any best friends, but just a group of friends that she was happy to play with in school (she has a laid-back temperament).

A rare space came up in a very good all-through school with an attached secondary, and the school we would like her to go for secondary. We lost sleep over it, and decided it was a good opportunity to move her early, to save us the stress of the 11plus.

However, 5 days into the new school, my daughter is crying and said she sits at lunch by herself everyday, and just walks around the playground alone at break time, and isn't included in games by the other kids, and hates going to school. (In contrast to her old school where she was always very happy to go into school).

I'm considering moving her back to her old school. I know it will probably get better, but her old school was a pretty good school itself, and she was happy there, and we mostly did this to save the stress of 11 plus. But for e.g. she said she just wants to go to the bathroom and cry during break time, and that breaks my heart.

Does anyone have any views? Anyone do a year 4 move that was hard initially, but quickly resolved itself?

She said all the other girls in her new school are friends with themselves, and have history together, but she knows nobody in the school. She she just stands around being sad. It's only 5 days, but her space at her old school hasn't gone yet....

I would be very grateful for anyone with experience of moving school. Either for themselves or for their kids, and their experience of it.

OP posts:
skippy67 · 11/09/2025 08:06

We moved to another country for 3 years. When we returned, dd went into year 4 of our local school. She'd done reception year there prior to our move. The first weeks back in the UK school were hard. Similar tales of not being included etc, but she soon settled. Give it time, but keep an eye on it. Good luck.

Luxio · 11/09/2025 08:07

If she's staying there for secondary then no I wouldn't be moving her back. In a few years she would be moving school anyway and this will give her the chance to make some friendships earlier.

I would discuss with the teacher about ensuring she has a buddy to be with during the day and let them know she's finding the transition tricky but moves always take time and this will get better with time.

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