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Original poster

What to do with these guests?

183 replies

BluePony · 09/09/2025 18:58

DH& I have 3DC, 9/7/3months. My parents are visiting this weekend(live other end of country) via public transport. We have a car but it’s a 5 seater. Weather says it’s going to rain the whole time. Where we live there isn’t anything to ‘do’, it’s just houses/schools/supermarkets/charity shops. Live about a 25 minute bus journey from a city but it’s mainly shops so not much to do other than look in shops. What will we do with them whilst they’re here? There’s no nice scenic walks here, we’d need to drive 30 minutes but we can’t fit everyone in the car, this is the main issue as they’re not bringing their car.

We do take DC to soft play/zoos regularly but they’re 30-60 minutes away and again, only have 5 seats. I didn’t realise they weren’t driving (they did last time) and they’ve booked their travel.

OP posts:
JaninaDuszejko · 10/09/2025 05:43

My parents are visiting this weekend (live other end of country)

Assuming this isn't hyperbole then the nearby city must be Inverness, Aberdeen, Plymouth, Exeter, Bournmouth, or Portsmouth. All of which have things to do other than shops.

It's just a weekend. One day at home chilling and one day do a trip to a nearby attraction with your DH driving you all in two drives, where is your nearest EH or NT property or museum or art gallery or leisure centre or zoo or garden etc etc?

Shinysunday · 10/09/2025 05:51

Just remind them that you can’t fit them all in your car and will be mostly at home. They probably want to see you and the children more than go out. You might arrange some special games or food.
Older people can lose their confidence driving long distance or in unfamiliar places and I would not argue with this because it comes from having slower reaction times and worse eyesight etc and they may actually be unsafe.

Shinysunday · 10/09/2025 05:57

BoarBrush · 09/09/2025 20:30

Put the TV on and say oh well, let them be bored. Maybe they'll then learn how their anxiety has caused an issue for 5 other people.

Eh ??? OP hasn’t said how old or how well her parents are. They may not be safe driving long distances or in unfamiliar places. Sometimes anxiety is appropriate.

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TulipCat · 10/09/2025 05:59

You will need to split up and only some of you go out if you need the car.

Tourmalines · 10/09/2025 06:05

AdaColeman · 09/09/2025 21:39

Draw up a list of household projects for them to do....if Mother is good at sewing, she can make new curtains or clothes for the children, or maybe she could do some decorating, Dad could do some DIY or revamp the garden.
Get them involved with the cooking, meeting the children from school or taking them to the library, helping with the shopping.
Let them look after baby for a couple of hours to give you a break.
Encourage them to make your childhood favourite meals for your children to try.

You do realise that this is for a weekend only ?

garlictwist · 10/09/2025 06:09

AdaColeman · 09/09/2025 21:39

Draw up a list of household projects for them to do....if Mother is good at sewing, she can make new curtains or clothes for the children, or maybe she could do some decorating, Dad could do some DIY or revamp the garden.
Get them involved with the cooking, meeting the children from school or taking them to the library, helping with the shopping.
Let them look after baby for a couple of hours to give you a break.
Encourage them to make your childhood favourite meals for your children to try.

Bit sexist there!

sesquipedalian · 10/09/2025 06:19

OP, if they’re only coming for one weekend, they will want to see you and the DGC and they won’t much care about going out. What would you normally do? Going for a walk should be enough, if you need to get out of the house - but your DPs don’t need to be “entertained”: they’re coming to see family. Surely they’ll be playing with / reading to the DC? I really wouldn’t worry about it.

Glowingup · 10/09/2025 06:20

Odd post. First I don’t believe that there aren’t any walks or anything in your local area and that you’d be confined to the house. If it were true, how do you cope on a day to day basis if you don’t drive and have three young kids? There will be parks and areas to stroll around even if they aren’t the most scenic.
If there is a city nearby then get the train there. There won’t be “just shops” in a city. There will definitely be something to do..
I also find it weird to describe them as “these guests” when they are your parents. As people age, driving anxiety is a real thing plus driving really far is knackering so I can absolutely understand why they didn’t want to drive to yours.
Have you thought about learning to drive? Seems odd to choose to live somewhere where there is “nothing” when you have no means of transporting yourself and your children.
Sounds like you don’t want them to come and want validation for this from Mumsnet.

Caspianberg · 10/09/2025 06:26

Just stay in if it’s only 2 days.

Recently in laws were here. They stayed 10 days, and we went out and about, but not all day and not everyday. 2 days in would have been fine as they came to see everyone not all the attractions.

Things they did with Ds at home or nearby:
Games: board games, uno
Crafts: I bought a wooden birdhouse FIL built with him and then they painted. They brought Fimo modelling clay with them
Read books with him, listened to Tonie
Garden play: they Sat in garden a lot, played games at table, watched Ds play outside.
They also walked around local paths with him on his bike or scooter - just nearby as they can’t walk far

Bbq at house, we cooked, baked, generally sat around chatting, we did some garden work whilst they kept and eye on Ds. Etc

If you have a baby also they will be busy holding and playing with them as well as two older children.

Use taxi if you go out for dinner or find somewhere. It must be hard living somewhere with nothing to do though, three children and not being able to drive?

crossedlines · 10/09/2025 06:32

Yes it’s an odd post indeed.
@BluePonyyou say they brought their car last time they visited, so they obviously know the area and that there isn’t anything scenic/ interesting without a significant car journey. Therefore I wouldn’t worry too much about their visit. They know what to expect. Maybe they just want an easy weekend just seeing you and the kids and won’t even want day trips out.

I do agree with pp though. Unless there’s a medical reason you’re now going to mention, I would make learning to drive a priority. To put it bluntly, you can afford 3 children so surely you can afford driving lessons. Being so isolated in a place with no nice walks on the doorstep and nothing going on sounds awful. It must be limiting for you as far as work is concerned too.

I don’t think it’s the weekend guests which are the problem, you’ll get through that. It’s the bigger issue of living in an area of just houses, shops etc with nothing else to do and not being able to get in the car and take the kids out. Especially as you say using the bus to the city still doesn’t leave much to do.

Glowingup · 10/09/2025 06:38

I totally agree with @crossedlines. And it will be limiting for your children if everything involves a half hour journey in the car when your DH can take you. Your 9 yo isn’t going to be up for going to soft play for much longer and will soon want lifts everywhere. Also if your DH and you split or, god forbid, he died, you’d be really really stuck and confined living somewhere where there is nothing to do and with limited means of travel.

Teaandtoastserveddaily · 10/09/2025 06:39

When my mum visits we just potter around, do jobs together; pop out for a walk and watch telly and she helps me do some big jobs i never get round to like deep cleaning the cupboards. Sounds dull but it's very companionable and nice to be together. Surely adults don't need the level of entertainment and back to back activities all weekend?

JustChillin70 · 10/09/2025 06:42

Would your parents pay to hire a 7:seater for a couple of days that your husband would be willing to drive?

whiteroseredrose · 10/09/2025 06:46

My in-laws used to visit for a couple of weeks at a time and most of the time was spent at home, pottering with the DC, baking, building stuff etc. If DC were at school they watched TV, read or did household jobs.

Your parents are adults, they shouldn’t need entertaining.

PossibleIm · 10/09/2025 06:46

Op will they be visiting to see the sites or you and GC ?
Id not worry about it but make sure they undertsnd they will be pretty much house bound
But I'm sure they just want to be around you ?

Glowingup · 10/09/2025 06:47

JustChillin70 · 10/09/2025 06:42

Would your parents pay to hire a 7:seater for a couple of days that your husband would be willing to drive?

if they’ve paid for train tickets to travel across the country why the fuck should they also then pay to hire a 7 seater? I’ve just travelled across the country by train - cost me £180 for the ticket. They’re coming for two days. Nobody needs to hire anything and if the OP insists, then she can pay for the car hire.
Some people are acting like it’s a horrible imposition that these parents came by train and didn’t drive. I’m probably half their age and I’d be absolutely shattered driving 6-7 hours in a day (which “across the country” means) and then having to do it again a few days later.

Tiredandneedtogotobed · 10/09/2025 06:47

My mil doesn’t really like going out so when we visit her we stay at her house and she plays games with the kids, have all meals at her house, do some art and craft, go for a walk around the (residential) block. We watch TV and films.

I do get bored so I understand it may feel difficult and I always found it easier to entertain the kids outside of the home, but it’s doable to stay at home. They are visiting to see you and the kids.

I hope you have a nice weekend with them!

JellyTot222 · 10/09/2025 06:50

AdaColeman · 09/09/2025 21:39

Draw up a list of household projects for them to do....if Mother is good at sewing, she can make new curtains or clothes for the children, or maybe she could do some decorating, Dad could do some DIY or revamp the garden.
Get them involved with the cooking, meeting the children from school or taking them to the library, helping with the shopping.
Let them look after baby for a couple of hours to give you a break.
Encourage them to make your childhood favourite meals for your children to try.

I think op would be lucky if they ever wanted to visit again after this!

Lafufufu · 10/09/2025 06:51

Taxis are the answer...

Sounds like my mil....
Although she wouldnt get in the taxi "on her own" so my husband had to chaperone her while I drove the kids... 🙄

When she finally brought her car she wanted my dh to go with her too as she couldn't be expected to go "on her own"

Ihatelittlefriendsusan · 10/09/2025 06:53

I fail to believe that a city centre doesn't have something more than just shops. Maybe give us and idea of what city and people can suggest something.

Can you/them hire a bigger car for dh to drive over the weekend?

Zonder · 10/09/2025 06:57

I would ask for suggestions in the local Facebook group. There might be local things to do you haven't stumbled across yet. I've lived where we live for years but still find the odd new thing to do.

Do your parents understand that you won't be able to drive them? They could get an Uber if you do go out. Otherwise the odd walk around the neighborhood to a park would do.

Papadulo · 10/09/2025 06:59

Which city centre? I can’t believe there’s NOTHING to do in a city.

JetFlight · 10/09/2025 06:59

They’re visiting just for the weekend?
walking in the local area is fine. Wait for a break in the rain.
Spend the rest of the time just hanging out.
Play/read/do an activity with Dc.
cuddle the baby
Watch a film
Have some nice food in.

BernardButlersBra · 10/09/2025 07:08

I wouldn't give it much headspace as they are choosing to set up these circumstances.

Clarefromwork · 10/09/2025 07:08

Do you have a local pub you could walk too for lunch ?

Get takeaways or nice food in

Let the older ones have a couple of movie nights with them choosing a film each - popcorn, treats etc

Order some craft sets for them to do with yours kids round the table

Is there a park you could walk to if you get a break in the rain ?