DS19 needle spiked (roofied) on first night at university *edited by MNHQ

[Fraida]

Just sharing as I am so upset - dropped DS at halls university yesterday as he starts his first year. He went out last night and I got a call from the police at 1am saying they found him unconscious in the street (lesson here is make sure you have your emergency contact installed in your phone as that is how they called me). Took him to A&E and urine test etc showed traces of Rohypnal in system and evidence of a needle puncture wound on shoulder.

DS called me and apparently (he was in a gay club) a man in late thirties and early forties was hitting on him and he pushed him away. The last thing he remembers is feeling like he had been punched on his arm.

Police have been great and investigating but said it’s highly unlikely that they will find the perpetrator 😡However they will review CCTV footage and speak to the club. I’m just so upset and angry for him and needed to share.

I was victim of a suspected drink spiking many years ago. Had a drink at the bar i worked in after finishing my shift. Woke up in hospital; passerby had found me passed out in the street hours later - manager had just locked up and left me outside!
Hospital couldn't be less interested, didnt test for anything, just kept accusing me of having too much to drink.

Violating is exactly what it feels like!

I was such a mess, I ended up moving back home the following week.

I'm sorry this has happened to your DS and thank goodness he made it to safety although clearly not entirely unscathed. I hope the police/ university/ club get on top of it with the cctv/ patrols/awareness raising etc at the very least. Whoever stuck your DS with that needle is a dangerous predator end of. I'm also sorry for you, that people here are picking holes in your terminology which, from your description, was correct.

My dd was spiked when she was eighteen, her mates took her to the hospital. It wasn’t even recorded on any statistics or anything because they said ‘we don’t know if she was injected or it was a drink’. Like that mattered to the statistics. About a month later she was at a house party and the friend she with was raped by a stranger in the bathroom. He was sixteen. He followed her in to the bathroom and raped her.

So that’s their nights out. One spiked and one raped and the police could not give one fuck. But then come on Mumsnet and people will tell you to phone the police if someone knocks at your door.

Yep, I’m not young and I heard of roofies over twenty years ago.

OP, I’m so sorry for your poor son. I hope it doesn’t take the shine off such an important time of his life.

I'm so sorry, , @Fraida . That is terrible and I am sick with shock and anger at someone doing such a terrible thing to him, especially right at the beginning of what should be such an exciting and positive time. Love and solidarity to him.

I'm so sorry, , @Fraida . That is terrible and I am sick with shock and anger at someone doing such a terrible thing to him, especially right at the beginning of what should be such an exciting and positive time. Love and solidarity to him.

Nothing wrong with the title, really not sure why people are trying to undermine your account tbh...

Can I ask how old you are?

Roofied refers to being drugged. Very common and most people know this.

Spiked people think of alcohol. Drinks are spiked.

Op I am so sorry your ds is going through this. That’s fucking awful.

I'm 71 and haven't been in a club for nearly 50 years and I'm familiar with the term "roofied" referring to drugging with Rohypnol. I think the vast majority of people know what it means.

In order to inject a sufficient amount of rohypnol to cause adverse effects your son would have had to stay still for a noticeable amount of time to allow for the drug to be administered. Injecting someone is not subtle nor something that can be done in a split second in a busy, dark club where everyone is dressed and is presumably moving.

It is significantly more probable that the drug was in the drink and that the "needle puncture" mark is actually something else. When you report this please make sure all angles are investigated.

@Fraida It didn’t help that the shop assistants didn’t want to step in and challenge the man. Everyone is scared these days - understandably.

I would suggest dc maybe has a quiet first day of term in future. Was he with new friends? They all need to look out for each other.

According to government statistics needle spiking is more common in nightclubs: According to data from the National Police Chiefs’ Council, most spiking incidents – 80% – happen in public places, especially places where people go to enjoy themselves at night:

• almost half of reported incidents happened in a bar
• after that, night clubs were the most common location

Night clubs are far more likely to be the setting for needle spiking incidents than for drink spiking incidents:

• 38% of incidents in night clubs involved needles
• 17% of incidents in night clubs involved alcohol

More than half of the reported incidents of spiking took place in busy town centres or locations where there was a large number of bars and clubs. A small proportion of spiking incidents took place in people’s homes, mostly during house parties. Other places where spiking has been reported have included student unions, restaurants, festivals, carnivals, a garage, and a live music arena.

he’d only had one drink (was in the club for less than 30 minutes) and didn’t have a drink in hand as had been to toilet.

Wtf is wrong with you

It's terrifying that there are people out there prepared to do things like that. Years ago my SIL was out with her boyfriend in London and both of them had their drinks spiked. She was sick but he ended up in a coma in intensive care and was lucky to make it. I think it was very lucky SIL remained lucid enough to get help.

Christ what a nightmare. Your poor DS, poor you.

I suspect there are a lot more incidents than people realise among gay men because they are under reported. Historically as a group who had to deal with so much prejudice, so any negative publicity would be frowned on. I'm only surmising here, I don't know really.

Big hugs OP you must be distraught. I hope DS gets some counselling or support, you don't want him to spend those important Uni years in fear.

I'm so sorry this happened to your son. I had a spiked drink about 10 years ago. It happens so easily. I was with my then bf and a bunch of his friends and we had a table. We were in a group including an off duty bouncer, and were sat near the on duty doorman for the bar, who we knew. It was a regular karaoke night so people were stepping away from the table and other regulars were stopping by, but the table was never "unattended". Every girl at that table - 5 of us I think, got spiked. People can't remember getting home etc & none of us ever drank to the point of proper intoxication.

Initially I felt drunk. I was surprised as I'd had a drink quite quickly but not on an empty stomach. I knew my limit and that was under it. My ex got very angry with me for being drunk, though I swore I wasn't. My memories after then get v patchy and then there's a memory-free gap in which we made it home and I collapsed on the bathroom floor. Embarassing things happened in that bathroom. I was ill for a day or so afterwards. We didn't realise until a day or so later that spiking was a possibility.

Different situation to your son but other than the vindication that I was right- that I wasn't drunk - I was upset and felt humiliated and vulnerable. I didn't want to go out for ages afterwards. I just feel grateful my ex was there the whole time & got me home in one piece, despite being a twat about it.

Why have you deleted my message.. I'm not young or western and don't go to bars. If someone poisons your drink, they rape you or not

I'm a year younger and I've known what it means for many years too

My dd had her drink spiked at uni and was raped. The perpetrator was friends with quite a few in her group.
As another earlier poster stated, they often havent known their friends long enough for them to step in even if they think something doesnt look quite right. As one person noticed my dd seemed very 'out of it' but didnt step in.

The perpetrator was gay so not someone she felt she had to be on her guard against. She talked to him in a group that night out.

My dd had to have anti hiv medication afterwards for a month following this as a safeguard.

Unfortunately although the police said from cctv footage he had behaved suspiciously around her drink as he had looked after it when she went back to her room for 5 minutes, the footage was not clear enough for a prosecution.

She had a crystal clear memory of the evening up to a certain point and then she remembers nothing afterwards.

I'd say, never ever leave your drink with anyone ever, not even if it's with someone you think you can trust.

Disappointingly, many in the friendship group ostracized my dd. I can only guess that they thought she had got drunk, had sex and then regretted it and made a false claim to the police. (They were childhood friends of the perpetrator coincidentally)

@Pinkacer On first night in University halls, how do dc know anyone? That’s why I wondered who he went out with. Op had only just dropped him off. I would certainly advise not going out to a bar on the first night with people you do not know and they don’t know you. A student union type of event is different. I guess this was exploring but it feels a bit reckless to me. That is not to minimise the crime though. Students do need to be careful in new surroundings and bars.

Not that it is relevant as predatory behaviour is unacceptable but he was out with some people he went to school with that are at the same uni.

this is the first and last time that I will respond to you posts, but I will say I find your posts incredibly intrusive and offensive.

giving you the benefit of the doubt people are spiked in order to be robbed, sexually or physically assaulted generally. However it is highly inappropriate to ask for these details.