More women were killed by their sons than by strangers

[IwantToRetire]

This is just one of the sad statistics from the latest Femicide Report published yesterday.

The Femicide Census has identified 122 women who were killed by men in the UK in 2022. 62 women were killed by a current or former partner. More women were killed by their son than by a stranger. The vast majority of women were killed in their own home. Evidence of gratuitous violence was found in just over two-thirds of killings.

https://www.femicidecensus.org/femicide-census-publishes-its-annual-report/

I think what its incredibly sad is in a number of these cases mental health services have let families down with

I am not sure if this is addressed in the report

I've thought for a while that there is a lot of normalising of child on parent violence these days.

Sorry just adding this, as I think I probably used the wrong fact as the thread title. But it seemed so disturbing. The report shows that sadly women are more at risk from men they know or live with. Not just domestic violence, but also rape and sexual assault.

Key findings include:

• Consistent with previous years, women killed by men are most likely to be killed by a current or former partner than any other man. Sixty-two (51%) women killed by men in 2022 were killed by a current or former intimate partner. The average between 2009 and the end of 2021 is 60%.
• Leaving an abusive man is no guarantee of women’s safety. The Femicide Census has consistently shown that separation is a risk factor for intimate partner femicides, or more accurately, a trigger for violent, abusive and/or controlling men At least 40% of women killed by a current/former partner had left or were taking steps to leave him. Yet Women’s Aid regularly report that there are insufficient spaces in women’s refuges to meet need.
• A sharp instrument, such as a knife, was used in the killing of 65 women (53%). This has consistently been the most common method men choose to kill women.
• Men used the brute force of their own bodies in the killings of 20 women (17%) by kicking, hitting and stamping a woman to death.
• More women were killed by their sons than by strangers. 10% of women killed by men were killed by their sons. 9% were killed by strangers.

Of the men who killed women in 2022:

• Seventy-one men (57%) were known to have histories of violence against women and/or were subject to monitoring or restrictions by a statutory agency at the time they killed.
• The majority of men who kill women are charged with murder. 84% of all who killed, 97% of those charged, were charged with murder, double or multiple murder.

for all the women we have lost.

10% of women killed by men were killed by their sons

Wow that’s higher than I would have thought.

Not that year, but I knew one such person. A situation with years and years of all the things mentioned above - mental health, the medical intervention needed, time, funding, all of it - very sad to read this.

Seventy-one men (57%) were known to have histories of violence against women and/or were subject to monitoring or restrictions by a statutory agency at the time they killed.

Surely these should be the most preventable. Deeply depressing that it's such a high proportion.

And this situation doesn't help either for women https://www.channel4.com/news/early-release-scheme-criticised-by-domestic-abuse-victims

It doesn’t surprise me. I suffered a few years of domestic abuse when my ds was a teenager including punching, kicking, pushing me down the stairs, violence towards his sisters.

He only stopped when I fought back and phoned the police everytime he was violent (who were strangely very supportive when every other agency we worked with wasn’t) someone said to me once ‘you have the right to be safe in your own home, no matter who the perpetrator is’. And it’s always stuck with me.

no one wants to admit that their children are violent towards them as they are judged and made to feel a failure.

It’s not just mental health though. Perhaps the many people who think parents want to label their child as autistic to get benefits and a car need to realise the reality is many of them are beaten on a regular basis, have very limited support (if any at all) and are financially disadvantaged because of being a carer.

I think child to parent violence is such a taboo, no-one talks about it although it's pretty common. Parents feel such shame and embarrassment because they feel that they should be able to 'control' their violent child.

Our adult son has learning disabilities and autism and is now in supported living and doing well. We lived with the violent outbursts for years until I just couldn't do it any more. I love him dearly and it was the hardest thing I've ever done. But I also feel relief at not waking up every morning with a feeling of dread and anxiety and not having to walk on eggshells in my own home.

Thank goodness people are talking about it, having a violent 'child' is such a life sentence. It's unrelenting pain and shame.

In their own home 😥

I also wonder whether access to Incel and Andrew Tate stuff on line, is now playing a part in the behaviour of young men.

Well said. Lived through this for over 6 years.
Luckily we managed to find a way to sort it out and ds has not been violent since. He was very young g though so I wasn’t at risk of being killed, it was a horrible time though, and very much dismissed because he was a child.
There’s a huge taboo about it.

I had a look at the reports for previous years but unfortunately the information is not presented in the same way each year so hard to compare.

But if anyone is interested you can find the reports for previous years here https://www.femicidecensus.org/reports/

Out of interest, is there any data about daughters killing/injuring parents?
Or is it too much to hope the data might be sex disaggregated.

It is there in the reports but it doesn't use the say presentation of figures so harder to compare.

Just quickly flicking through the reports I saw one year ony one son was listed, and the next year just one daughter.

I'm not blaming them because I know how long it takes them to compile all the figures.

There is a 10 year report from about 10 years ago so that might show something.

And personally, whilst I am of course horrified that for so many women who have been killed it was in their own home, I wonder if the killing of parents by their children (or other family members?) should be reported separately.

ie a man who is in a relationship with a womenand and is violent towards her, is surely somehow different to a child or sibling being violent.

And sadly of course there is familicide where usually the husband / father kills not just his wife but their children.

This report isn't about familicide but about children murdered by a man known to be a domestic abuser.

https://www.womensaid.org.uk/womens-aid-publishes-new-19-more-child-homicides-report/

That's a very good point, my friend's daughter sadly has very severe psychiatric problems and has had a lifetime of terror. No bennies (I don't think it occurred to them) but enormous financial impact, enormous. And the finances are just a drop in the ocean of the impact.

Perhaps it is off piste but still it's women not just being but also feeling unsafe in their own homes.

And it's a rare husband who doesn't fuck off out of dodge when things are just so awful. 70% of marriages with a disabled child fail, can't say I blame them for leaving really.

This does not surprise me at all.

In my own family there was child to parent and sibling to sibling domestic violence, which easily could have escalated. Just a few weeks ago a lady local to me was killed by her son.

Mental health problems a factor in both. Families just do not get the support they need.

I bet that has something to do with it. And what role do their fathers play in their upbringing? Boys need strong, decent male role models

Please stop posting meaningless statistics.

You need to provide context, otherwise people won't understand the message you arw attempting to get across.

If you read the OP you will find there is a link to the statistics.

Its always worth reading the OP in full and more importantly any links that provide the substance to the OP.

There are statistics in the reports that date back over 20 years.

When you've read them then you will understand the statistics.