Relative in US not answering emails or phone - what should I do?

[SirChenjins]

Relative is my uncle. He lives alone, not the easiest of people to get along with (just like my dad was), very independent and doesn't like many/any people, and estranged from his 2 ex-wives and his daughter. He's our only living relative on my deceased dad's side so my sister and I keep in touch with him by email - we are his next of kin.

I usually hear from him regularly, and if I email he emails back within a day or 2. Last email I had from him was a about 3 or 4 weeks after the last one I sent, which is unusual. All he said was he'd had a recurrence of previous health issues (didn't say what but he's had a stroke, problems with his vision, and a couple of other things). That was about 2 weeks ago. I phoned him at the weekend and there was no answer.

Both Dsis and I are sole beneficiaries which means his lawyer does have our names and addresses if he has passed away (I'm assuming we would be told?), but I'm not sure what on earth to do here - if he's in hospital then would we be informed? And by whom? Or should I be contacting someone in the US to say we're concerned? And if so, who?

Actually, you say he's been ill, he too 3 or 4 weeks to email you last time and it's only been 2 weeks since your last email.
Likely to be that he is not coping as well rather than anything else. I would give it another couple of weeks and then send some higher concern messages or request the welfare check. You've done all you can realistically.

Thanks @jonthebatiste - other than Crisis Intervention (MH) and Missing Persons, we've tried those numbers. I can't see his area under the local PD list - how would I find out which one covers his neighbourhood, do you know?

Have you looked to see if the Lawyer has a website?

There is a horrible, parasitic industry in the US of people getting legal responsibility for the elderly and taking over their lives (and their estates in death).

I’d be looking for Texas residents facebook groups etc. and asking for advice there.

I've just checked my emails - I've got my dates wrong. I emailed him on 3/7. Didn't hear back from him until 12/8 to say he'd had a recurrence of some health issues. I emailed him that day and have heard nothing since.

I'm assuming you have his home address, not just a postal address? Put that into Google, zoom out, and see what quadrant his neighborhood falls into. If you zoom out to a specific magnification, you may actually see neighborhood names. If you don't see it, dial the number of the closest one and ask for help getting you to the right station. People are generally very helpful with these things and it shouldn't take long. If you want to DM me I can try to see what might be the closest match.

ETA: try the missing persons number first. I think they'll have the best idea. It's only 8.06am there right now. Give it until 10/11am their time.

The lawyer's practice is showing as permanently closed on Google, but his lawyer is still showing up on searches.

https://www.houstontx.gov/police/pdfs/hpd_beat_map.pdf - this looks helpful

https://www.houstontx.gov/police/pdfs/hpd_beat_map.pdf - this looks helpful

if no answer, call local police station and request a welfare check.

Yes, this. A friend of mine couldn't get into contact with her sister, because the sister's son was controlling her. Another friend, who has been a para-medic in the States, recommended exactly the same thing.

I know it’s a ridiculously long shot but the British actor Matthew Marsden lives in Texas and is active on twitter/X , you could try reaching out?

https://www.houstontx.gov/police/contact/substations.htm - also this if you can correlate to his home address.

The equivalent of Social Services is Health and Human Services - they might be able to help?
https://www.hhs.texas.gov

I'd also call the local hospitals in his area.

For Houston, you could also try the 311 service (713-837-0311) - www.houstontx.gov/311/. This can connect you to the Department for Human Services who may be able to assist, or signpost to other help. The call centre is available 24/7.

Thanks. Do the numbers correspond to the zip codes?

I've called that number - gave the details and they put me through to the PD number as they said that was the service I needed.

Have you contacted the British Consulate in Houston, OP?
0207 008 5000
+1 202 588 6500
https://www.contact.service.csd.fcdo.gov.uk/emergency-help/contact/usa/british-consulate-general-houston

No I haven't - good call, thanks

@jonthebatiste Have sent you a DM

No, doesn't look like it. It's a bit like how NHS maps don't correspond with postal codes or local educational authorities in the UK. Annoying. But a combo of Google maps and the Beat Map should get you there. The Beat Map has the telephone numbers of the relevant stations. No DM received, I've sent you a telephone number for the station I think it might be.

@jonthebatiste I've just replied to your DM - thanks so much

I’m in the U.S. I would call emergency services. We dial 911 to do that but you may not be able to from where you are. I’d google a local business and ask them to call 911 with your uncle’s address.

I really don't want to call anyone I don't know (and who isn't the PD) and give a stranger his address - I've no idea who I'm calling and whether they're trustworthy. It's too much of a risk.

I'd look at getting an international calling card and just sitting on hold to Houston PD. The other option is contacting your local police force in the UK via their non-emergency line and ask for assistance that way. I know this works very well for international SAR operations, but I'm afraid I don't know how well it would work for a more "straightforward" welfare check.

Good idea re the calling card and local police service - thanks

Can you call any local hospitals?