Feeling wobbly - new school year and life upheaval

[coffeepower]

I'm not sure what I'm hoping for from this thread, I think I just wanna get things out.

We've just moved to a new area and kids have just started at a brand new school (year 1&3). Not only that my DH has started a new job at his school (secondary teacher) which was the reason for the move. I WFH so I've been able to stay in my job. Since we moved over the summer it's been pretty chaotic here settling in etc.

DH and I have been together almost 20 years although we are having a bad patch right now due to some long term mental health issues of DH which came to a head just before we moved - therapy etc is happening and we're trying hard to work through it. It's an added stress though over an already stressful period.

Today everyone has gone off and started their new school years. I'm in my office at home and just feeling so unexpectedly emotional.

We don't know anyone nearby yet, although hoping that will change as we get more settled. I love this area, we are gonna be really happy here but I think today is the first time it's really hit me how much of a change this is.

None of my friends, nor my close family have serious partners or kids, so I don't really have anyone who understands what I'm going through. My only family are my elderly mum and my extremely ill sister, so obviously I can't lean too much on them. DH family are non existant.

I'm trying to support everyone but nobody is available to support me.

So yeah, just wanted to send this out into the void rather than hold it in anymore. Hopefully it will help. Thanks for reading if you made it this far 👋

Hi
That sounds really overwhelming for you.. It sounds like the move has come at a bad time given your DHs mental health issues - sounds like you're feeling vulnerable because of that?

Have you done a school run yet, is there a parents Whatsapp?

Re support, could you get yourself some counselling? It's really good that you've recognized you need someone to learn on too.

I think this is probably the first calm, quiet, alone moment you've had and all the chaotic craziness or everyone moving everything and the issues in your marriage are all just hitting you in the face and overwhelming you this morning. Give yourself a break because you've got an awful lot going on.

You need someone to talk to and to give you a bit of support, maybe some counselling would help?

It's a massive upheaval for all of you - give it time. 25 years ago, I moved to a new area with 4 children and 7 months pregnant - DH worked away in the week and I didn't know a soul! I would advise you to get involved in the local community - join the PTA at your kids school and invite any friendly mums for coffee/playdates. Join some local groups if you can, the local library should have a board with information about local goings on and local Facebook groups can be invaluable too. In our town, there's a ladies running group, ladies social club, historical society, gardening groups and lots more. Get out and about and smile and say hello to everyone you meet! Good luck OP, I'm sure you will find new friends and activities in time 💐

sending you a virtual hug with the strong advice to put the kettle on and be kind to yourself. x

So far all advice and comments have been sensible. I will add my Best Wishes for you.
Are you now or have you been a member of any church or religious organisation? Most these days are more interested in service rather than active preaching. Look through the websites of local churches. Where I live the Baptists are active with groups for meeting people. Several of the workers are early retired so not decrepit or other worldly.