Any last min words of wisdom for a 11 year old boy quite worried about starting secondary school tomorrrow ?

[Goggleboxermum]

Anything I can pass on in the am ?
Ive told him
be yourself
loads of people are in the same boat
keep preserving
sone lessons will be nice more interesting than primary school

anything other words of wisdom for him
his older sibling wasn’t so worried at starting as he is xxx

I’m in the exact same situation. Feeling sick with worry.
I don’t have any advice. But I did go out and buy nice breakfast treats for tomorrow. And I’ll be taking and collecting from school this week I think

good luck!

You are one of many new students. Not the onlynone. Noone will starre

It might be fun

No specific advice but my DS was very nervous about secondary a few years ago but quickly settled in and enjoys it. He's made good friends.
Is there anything specific that he's worried about?

It's completely normal to feel nervous. Ask him to imagine himself coming home, you asking him how it went, and him saying, yeah it went OK.
Within a week he'll know his way round. He'll make new friends. It will be OK, he can handle it.

My DS started last week (Ireland). He was so nervous, honestly he was fine and absolutely loves his new school. I planned before that him & I would go for lunch afterwards just the two of us so he could tell me all. That helped having one to one time. His 1st day went well but not brilliant but 2nd day onwards he just loved it. Long may it last!
Best of luck to all your kids starting this week x

Hope this is helpful x

Starting secondary school - BBC Parents' Toolkit - BBC Bitesize https://share.google/RH1RMu4wY6JECVUJo

This is so lovely! And a brilliant idea. I’ll take mine for dinner after school and have that one to one time to hear all about the day

Mine is going straight to drama and then to her dad's

But she does want me to come get the bus back with her from high school. Just not sure how much I'll get out of her but fingers crossed

I'm an ex-secondary teacher and now work in children's mental health. I alao have three children going into years 11,10, and 7 this week.
My middle one really struggled with the transition to secondary, but he is now going into Year 10 and loves school.
I would say this:

Everyone is nervous, even the teachers . I never went through a September in teaching without feeling utterly sick for the first few days.

Teachers are generally really lovely people and they go into teaching because they want to work with children and young people.

You will find your people - not straight away, but unlike primary school where you are kind of pushes into friendships because you're in a class together, at secondary you will get a chance to meet people who like the things you like, and who really get you.

Take it a lesson at a time - he doesn't need to think about getting through the whole day, just concentrate on the lesson he is in.

For you, as his mum, I would say be as positive as you can without undermining his feelings. Tell him that you know he's nervous and that is normal, but that the this is the hardest bit - after tomorrow it will start to feel easier and easier. Tell him that you are excited for all the new things he will do, and reiterate that this is a time full of hope and potential.

As parents we need to tread a balance between empathy and confidence. "Yes -it feels big and scary, but I know you can do this and you're ready for this next step, which is going to be so exciting and fun".

My daughter who is going into Y7 later this week had an awful time at primary school and never went in happily (she's autistic and really struggled with the environment,). She's told me this week that she "hates school", but I've told her that she doesn't hate "school," she hates her primary school and that is over now.

She is going to walk in with her brother and a few of his friends - has your son got a plan about who he is walking in with? If not can you drop him off tomorrow (lots of Y7s will be dropped off on the first day) and then get him to make plans to walk in with someone tomorrow?

If feels like such a huge step, and it is, but they will find their feet and if he can't think of any positives yet, just remind him that it's a short week this week!

Keep your head down in the corridors and ignore any drama.

talk to people, they’ll be as nervous as you

join in! Find clubs, sports, things going on in the library and you’ll find people.

it won’t be as bad as you think, you won’t get too lost, no one is putting you in detention for making a mistake in your first day and you might actually enjoy it.

The first day will probably be quite fun! Ours have been told they’re spending time with their form, having an assembly, then it’s break time, getting stuff like fingerprints for lunch and computer stuff set up, a tour of the school, some fun stuff and then going home! No real work!

If you feel shy look for someone also on their own and I introduce yourself.

dont be afraid to ask if you get lost

the library is a good refuge if needed

Thank you all such good advice
yes he’s arranged to walk with a friend

it’s just so different from his lovely primary school and such a big change

what other Things are more enjoyable then primary for kids
I can only think of more interesting lessons ….

I think there's lots to look forward to at secondary school even though it seems daunting at first. My DC were at a village primary with less than 50 kids in the whole school so it was a huge change. They'd been very happy at the village school but were ready to move on when the time came. Things that they liked included
A much bigger pool of potential friends.
Different teachers for different subjects.
A wider range of subjects.
More sports and extra curricular activities.
Science labs and other subject specific rooms and equipment.
More exciting trips including the chance to go abroad with school.
More choice for lunches and being able to choose what they felt like at the time rather than whatever they'd pre ordered.

It is a big change and a bit of a shock to the system going from being the oldest in primary to the youngest in secondary and having to get used to a lot of new things, but there's a lot to look forward to. Mine did find it a little overwhelming at first but by half term they all had new friendship groups and had settled in, found clubs to join and so on.
It's easier said than done, but try not to worry too much.

Not advice as such but I was terrified of starting secondary school too and my much older brother told me “before you know it you’ll be leaving this place on your last day”. I didn’t enjoy school very much (didn’t hate it either though) but he was right, that 5 years disappeared so quickly and that was 30 years ago now! And that time has disappeared quickly too.

Even now when I have something I don’t really want to do I think about how quickly that 5 years went and how right he was and how time passes much quicker than we realise.

Good luck to him for the morning x

Thank you
I really hope it goes ok
of course I try to act bright and breezy to him while at the same time try to not dismiss his feelings but these has given me ideas of positive thugs to say to him like the science labs etc

Good luck to all your what feels like little ones starting big school today xxx

mine looked so nervous this am
hope he’s ok
I’ve gotta head out soon so that might help
plus you know what
at least this day is finally here
and it is what it is

How did he get on today OP?

Hope it went well today. I’m a bit late to the party but the song letter to myself by the lottery winners is full of great advice for a kid in this position.

Hey little update for you, he didn't really enjoy it, but it wasn't a disaster, so I'll take that

He seems alot happier tonight amd far less worried
So onwards we go

Thanks so much for the support

And I'll listen to that song now and get him to aswell
Thank-you

Wow what a brilliant song
hiw have I not elhesrd of that before ?! Thank you for sharing that
it’s actually made me feel better too ❤️❤️❤️