Feeling untethered - don't know why or what to do about it.

[Joyfulincolour]

I'm in my early 50s and I am feeling a bit lost but I don't really know why.
I have a supportive family, a group of great friends & a job. I changed jobs last year, as I thought these feelings were due to being overworked & stressed. My current job is much steadier but large parts of it feel trivial and I think I'm bored. I've tried looking into alternative jobs but things feel quick limited at the moment (I work in healthcare).
I'm perimenopausal but having medical issues still relating to bleeding/fibroids. I've really noticed that I've lost all my tolerance for people & situations. I know this is normal & is linked to the reduction in the calming hormones but I feel very irritated by lots of things now. I've also got aching joints & an old back injury that are painful. I really want to start exercising but need something gentle to start with & don't know where to look for this.
I've considered whether I'm depressed & I don't think I am but equally there are lots of things I just can't be bothered with now (going out in the evenings etc).
I feel I'm looking/searching for something, maybe meaning but not sure what. I've even thought about looking into Buddhism to see if this would make me feel calmer & less annoyed with people/life. I have never had a religious faith so this would be a big leap for me. I'm not even sure if it's what I do need.
Ive done lots of self help stuff & continue to do things like journaling & meditation but they dont feel enough at the moment.
Can anyone relate to this? Any suggestions of things that have worked for you?
Thank you.

By untethered do you also mean unfulfilled?

I’m a similar age. Hobbies are one thing but do you have interests? I love history and live near a place of historical interest, I visit and walk the dog there a lot. I used to really enjoy physical exercise but now just do loads of long dog walks.

I think it’s normal to become a bit impatient with people’s trivial ‘problems’ as we get older and have experienced less trivial problems ourselves.

I feel the same way. I am looking for a fulfilling next chapter I think.

Are you on HRT? It has helped me (a little!) with the overwhelming irritation (bordering on blind rage) that I was feeling. Still get it but has dulled it a bit.

HRT is not necessarily going to be 100% solution but I do feel some of what you describe is part of perimenopause and so a medical and physical and spiritual approach might help. Pilates has made me feel more physically resilient - took me nearly a year to commit to more than just the odd session but now I go once a week and treat it like a prescription of “medicine” (so no illusion I enjoy it which weirdly seems to take the pressure off!).

And if you have a supportive family, use that for some “payback” for the years nurturing and caring you have done. Disappear for a day/weekend/week to do something you enjoy and brings you joy/calm/nourishment (or whatever you are seeking) Explore Buddhism if you like or kayaking or morris dancing 😬

Work more complex - either look for more stretch in the role or use the fact it isn’t too taxing to give you space and energy outside of work to gain more fulfilment through other routes (see above!)

Not sure if that helps but reading your post you sound like 99% of my 50 something friends - it’s such a strange time- I feel more capable than at any other time in my life but also exhausted and irritated by life…..

I'm feeling like this too OP. Only without the supportive family as I am CFNBC and have no family unit, which doesn't help. I'm grumpy at everything at the moment. I was doing great on HRT until a couple of months ago when I had a panic attack and I haven't been able to get myself right again since. I was taken off testosterone for a while and although I am back on it I know I am underdosing and wonder if that's the issue. Peri sucks.

I’ve been feeling like this recently.

what has helped for me is: Sleep, Pilates, routines. I’m not all the way there yet and I’m struggling with improving my diet.

also embrace the face that things that used to bother you previously just doesn’t any more.

Yoga is the gentlest form of exercise I can think of. And it will tie in with the spiritual yearnings you’re experiencing.

Splash out on a really excellent mat (I found after years of inferior versions that a wondrously non-slippy Liforme mat transformed my ability and willingness). Choose a colour that sings to you. Don’t feel you must join a class straight away - it can be quietly satisfying to try things out at home first. You may find you prefer to read about positions first and then try them - I personally cannot stand someone wittering at me from You tube or an app while I’m trying to concentrate. You won’t need any special clothes for home wear - but if you’re not accustomed to wearing leggings or a leotard you will immediately see yourself differently if you get one. Guaranteed to help with aches and pains, and give you a sense of calm and achievement. Try it!

Thanks everyone, I will read through your suggestions later when I'm back from work.
I am on HRT and see a specialist to tweak the doses of Oestrogen, Progesterone & Testosterone. The hormones helped to ease some symptoms when I started them 3-4 years ago, but this unsettled feeling is a more recent thing.

I just want to say that untethered is such a perfect word. That’s the word I’ve been looking for when trying to describe how I feel. Thank you.

I have no advice though! So apologies for jumping on your thread and being useless.

Gosh are you me?
I hate this feeling and am desperate for it to pass and nothing I do seems to help at all. No advice just sympathy

Thanks everyone for the comments, suggestions & solidarity!
It really is a strange, unsettling feeling and usually I'm quite resourceful at finding ways to ease struggles like this, but not this time.
I think I'm going to look for a gentle online yoga class/video that I can start to follow to see if that works.
I have worked with a coach previously regarding my job/work so I might contact her again too.