7yr old ds choked weeks ago and now is so anxious

[glassof]

As title says really, 7 year old ds chocked whilst eating a bacon sandwich. It was awful, I had to do back and then chest thrusts. He then vomited. All over in less than a minute. I am paediatric first aid trained, and I feel it really kicked in.

After, ds was in shock, tears, shaking, all normal and we comforted and reassured as best we could.

So the issue, we are now 3/4 weeks on, he is so anxious about food. He drinks water after every mouthful, a meal takes ages, he won't eat certain things if it is something needing lots of chewing (like chicken) it's consuming everything he does.

Sometimes he will be eating and a tiny bit feels like it's got stuck and he is panicking and sad, then won't eat any more of the meal.

We are still reassuring etc but how can we help him get over this? He is normally a happy go lucky kid that just moves on but this has just consumed him.
Any advice or tips?

This happened to our child a couple of years ago, and it stopped her eating. We got a book from amazon (the anxiety gremlin) on recommendation from the GP which I have to say has been great for her. The GP also spoke to her about how many times she had eaten before and never choked, and how it was just a small incident etc...... it took a while for her to start eating normally again, but we did get there.

We also cut her food up really small (like when they were toddlers) and that helped. She wont eat roast beef anymore though at all.

Thank you. I will have a look for the book and speak to him again about how choking is rare. I did consider taking food right back to toddler. Will also try that. Thanks

This is the book we got, it has honestly really helped and I go back to it still now if she is having a wobble about something. I really hope it works for you.

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Starving-Anxiety-Gremlin-Children-Aged/dp/1849054924/ref=mp_s_a_1_2?adgrpid=159946288983&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.EncIjhrgYcHvwaTHoas6AWZeq2NYRi7gBVsYR5B92nXRubu5vCda7gdssYqBW_07AfbN2Sx3OTtNhhgpu_J18GBPZ92tj3S1sFaf1-ZuRmEj5RrGlXyA1vY9u1DRZGGDJOI_dKxEllMtgF-nfHjs0ZlPl19Hq0uVwzMCOhdlhweKSY8aw0KPFbH0mqm6xsxetZ4sob417Zpen8JOZD-e1g.wLeq3_d6J0N3eLVYQzbVMCL7PpMe5zE84Dgb5kyQTIw&dib_tag=se&gad_source=1&hvadid=697080095404&hvdev=m&hvexpln=70&hvlocphy=9045715&hvnetw=g&hvocijid=12237330677093684600--&hvqmt=e&hvrand=12237330677093684600&hvtargid=kwd-316414287808&hydadcr=21638_2291913&keywords=the+anxiety+gremlin&mcid=0a143adb779d3e3c81bd3d2107adc594&qid=1756279017&sr=8-2

Thanks, might reach out to the school nurse team too

If food consumption is really low (ie losing weight) perhaps try offering easy to eat, minimal chewing snacks like yoghurt or apple purée. Would he be happier eating some snacks while watching tv, might take his mind off the actual food and chewing. I think it’s probably just a matter of time to rebuild his confidence in eating.

We had similar when DS was about 9yrs. Initially the anxiety was so bad we gave him fortisip drinks as he lost a stone in weight. We removed all pressure to try eating anything and made sure any meal we offered was soft - mashed potatoes etc. Gradually he built up confidence again but it took ages.

An A&E doctor told us to use full fat coke as it dissolves anything!! So for a while we let DS have one of those tiny cans of coke when he ate, because he trusted what the doctor had said and it gave him confidence to try and eat again, it was a bit of a safety blanket really!

Speaking as an adult who had/s an issue with swallowing, I can tell you how I have mostly overcome it.

Mine started with anxiety that made my jaw tighten and I felt I couldn't swallow anything, even water. I hadn't even choked to cause this, I think mine was down to anaemia and stress.
I saw my gp about it and they did give me a small amount of anti anxiety medication which did help, but even trying to swallow them was awful and they were tiny.
I started to make tiny amount of runny ready brek and would eat that. I would have cuppasoups and just have the liquid to start with. Every mouthful would take ages to work up the ability to swallow as it felt the muscles wouldn't work properly. I built up to be able to have a thicker ready brek and more of it and eat the lumps in the cupasoups. I would have setbacks, and would have to adjust food consistency, but I persevered. Every mouthful would have to be chewed so many times. When I started to eat with my family again, it would take me an hour to eat a quarter of a portion.
It was about a year before I could eat 'properly' and even now I get meals I struggle with. I still can't eat boiled sweets or whole grapes as I feel I don't have control about when I swallow them and feel they will go down before I am ready.
I lost 13kg in the months before I could eat again. I needed to lose the weight but I do not recommend doing it this way.
Incidently, the one time I did think I was going to choke was when I was eating a little bit of roast dinner and the piece of stuffing got stuck in my throat. I was home alone and I had to keep calm and just swallow again. Thankfully it went down, but the feeling of panic afterwards was awful and it set me back again for a while. The process was very much two steps forwards k one step back.

If it were my child,I would speak to the gp and see if they could refer them for help. It is horrible having this type of anxiety. I really hope they get the help they need and get through this.

Thank you all, I have spoken to school nurses and they have suggests local mental health services for a little cbt. Also going back to basics with food. Will try and see how we get on

One of my sons choked in his early 20s, needing the Heimlich manoeuvre. He lived on Huel shakes for a year and dropped to just over 8st at 5'7". He's back to being a food hoover now after therapy for anxiety.

What an awful shock for you both, OP. I'm sorry not to be able to add to the very good suggestions so far, but just wanted to say how well you did to stay calm and apply what you knew. All the best for his recovery.

Hi, we were in your situation 3 years ago, with extreme anxiety around eating. I'm going straight to the point and recommend EMDR as the only thing that turned our child's life around. We wasted a year of our child'life trying to find the right support until EMDR was offered and things started to improve nearly immediately. After 6-8 sessions our child had completely overcame their fears. There is hope!

Thank you for replying. I will have a look into emdr, not something I had even thought about. We have services locally too