Is it weird if i join an NCT class as a second time parent?

[2ndtimearoundd]

I never went to any NCT/antenatal groups before my first child was born a couple of years ago.

Is it strange if i join a group if I’ve already had a child and know how to do parenting stuff? Mostly for the social side of it as I don’t have any mum friends.

honest thoughts please

I did. There is an 11 yr age gap between my dc, and I had a new dh who had never been to any prenatal care ever. He never seen a newborn baby.
It was good for both of us. Refreshed my mind and fed his mind.

Maybe? You’ll be in a different place to all the other first-times mums. But as long as you don’t sit there with a knowing smile you should be OK 🤣.

I'm still friends with most of the people in my third NCT group! Missed out first time due to premie, second lot were competitive nutters, loved my third group!

I think some areas also do classes for second/subsequent time mums/parents.

No, do it! It's just about having people at the same stage as you off work etc

I think it would depend on the age gap.

I had 2 under soused the budget I had for not to do newborn classes and studiously looked for mums with a 1- 2.5 yo and newborn....
It worked out better for me as playmates were very easy and you dodge all the first time mum stuff.

If i had a big gap i might...

We did this, mainly because I was in hospital and ended up missing most of the course we were booked onto with DC1. It was ok, some of it was a useful refresher and our instructor covered the topics in a slightly different way, so I felt like I still learnt something. We skipped the nappy changing session though

One of my very best friends was a second time mum in our NCT group. We all thought she was awesome and learned so much from her - her house was a tip with life threatening levels of Lego chaos, her toddler was often covered in mud or paint, and it was pretty obvious she wasn’t getting up an hour early to make sure she looked perfect every day. But they were all happy, healthy, and doing it again. So how hard could it be? (DCs are now 35)

Something I found incredibly difficult with dc2 was this expectation that I knew everything from dc1 and was basically left to get on with it. They were totally different and I was lost and dealing with a 3yo at the same time. So go for it. You never know what information you'll need until you need it!

Sometimes they run second-timers courses so just ask when you do the application :) But it will still be good to go to a standard course if that is what is offered.

I found NCT brill for a social support network. And YY, when you have a second baby it's astonishing how much the midwives etc just assume you already know everything.

I did with my second, as my partner was a first time dad. I basically sat in silence each session to make sure I wasn't sounding like a know it all, and had to be creative each time the leader went around the room to ask what we'd learnt that day 😆 but it was lovely to meet more ladies and have them to socialise with on Mat leave. I say go for it!

I went to NCT for our first then two years later the teacher asked if any second timers would like to join her next group as she liked having someone who had recent experience for them to get to know. There was another second timer too. However it was harder to socialise with the second lot because they all just had one baby and I had a baby plus a two year old. I did keep DS in nursery one day a week and take DD to baby groups and made friends there though.

Hmmmmm… the second time parents in our group were immensely annoying. Lots of ‘when they’re here you’ll understand’ and ‘the instructor is wrong, you should do it just like we did’ type stuff. Avoid that and you’ll be grand.

I did centering pregnancy instead of NCT, but there was one second time and one third timer. It was actually really nice because they had a bit more experience and could offer complimentary opinions to the leader. Every baby is different, so they also had surprises and worries with theirs despite having more experience

I did an anti-natal at the local hospital with my 2nd because I hadn't done them with my first as we were moving area towards the end of pregnancy.
There were two other mums who were 2nd (or more). One had 2 children and didn't engage at all except when she came up for air after kissing boyfriend in week one to tell us that he was the love of her life etc. She'd broken up with boyfriend by week 3 and came to tell us he was the worst person in the world then left. Bit odd.
Other was someone who'd got a 7yo, but had given birth in US and wanted to find out the difference. Then I'd got dd1 aged 3yo.

I don't think I found out much I hadn't known really, but it was at last partially for socialising. We met a number of times afterwards.
We had one person who had their dc a couple of weeks before everyone else did and proceeded to be the one who knows it all, and lecture everyone about how if you did it "this way then your dc will sleep through the night/take a bottle/be the most intelligent 2 months old that ever lived/walk early/speak before they were 4 months old" etc.
So me and the other 2nd time mum spent quite a bit of time reassuring anxious first time mums that what the other person said was a load of cobblers when they were crying because they hadn't eaten spinach the week before baby was born so they wouldn't get good muscle structure etc... yes, that was one example.

I also spent quite a bit of time with a couple of the mums who were struggling breastfeeding as I'd done it before. Both of them managed to bf to after weaning, so that was helpful for them, and one of them then became a bfing counsellor.

Looking back I don't think I gained a lot from the classes; however it was quite nice for the first couple of months when we were all sleep deprived to be able to meet up and know we were all feeling the same.
I don't think it was really worth doing for me.

I think people often do to make friends