Best / most valuable hobby your DD did?

[Onionringsforbreakfast]

DD is 7

She’s been into gymnastics but suddenly decided she wants to quit.

TBH I’m ok about it, I get the impression gymnastics either means join the squad/competition team and dedicate your life to it (no thanks) or you’re just the weekly hour lesson fodder who does your lesson weekly until you get bored.

Her new thing is horse riding. I feel a bit more supportive of this. I rode and as an older kid / teen spent hours at the stables helping out and loved it. I never had own horse or competed but riding gave me so much.

What’s the best hobby your DD has / had from a social/emotional / personal perspective?

DD has danced from being 3. She's 12 now and still loves it and actually wants to go on to dance college (at the moment, she could change her mind yet!). Her friends from dance are her best friends and she's spent more time with them over the summer holidays than her school friends.

She did try gymnastics but was ignored for the most part as was never squad material and did swimming until she was good enough to not drown but had no real passion for either.

In no particular order
Choir
Tennis
Scouts

I was going to say climbing as well. Our wall seems to cater for both the squad members and kids who just want to do lessons. So many adults climb and you never have to do competitions if you don’t want to. However, competitive climbing makes competitive gymnastics look cheap!

Rowing. It sounds posh but we’re really not 😂
She loves it, it keeps her active, she loves doing races, and it’s taught her responsibility, teamwork, and how to be reliable.

instrumental lessons for one; always a hobby but she was good at it, got her a similar group of friends, and she has a lot of fun and socialisation on the open mic circuit.

The other one made friends more easily, but karate helped with posture and confidence. She also worked coaching little ones as an older teen,

I always made them do swimming lessons as a non negotiable life skill, but what’s valuable to one kid might not be right for another. Your job as a parent is to let them try as much as possible, fair enough they have to keep it up for whatever block of sessions you’ve paid for, and let them find their passions.

Brownies, guides and now rangers - built life skills and a different (from school) friendship group

Streetdance - been going to a weekly class in a local church hall since she was 6 and she's now 15. It was a bit of fun initially to try something new and we couldn't find a gymnastics class that she wanted to do! She really enjoys it, has done dance exams, got a great group of friends through the classes, danced at high profile events, the annual end of year show has given her confidence to perform and she helps out at the younger kids class as her Duke of Edinburgh volunteering.

Scouts for DD1. She summed it up herself recently (she's 14)... itvwas Scouts that gave her the confidence to try other things. (She was extremely shy and lacking in confidence...she still quiet but she's the one everyone trusts to get things organised and to succeed.)

For DD2... Rugby then scouts a close 2nd. Girls rugby is full of girls that don't fit conventions, and they seem to get confidence from each other that that is OK.

Squash - she now coaches as well as playing for her university team and has made many friends

Scouts for both DD and DS. DD is a leader now and hoping to join the University scouting group, she completed her young leaders belt and they are planning on doing there network belt next summer (hopefully in Italy). DS is an young leader and explorer, it's given him confidence which I never though he'd have.

They have both learned a lot from scouting and have evenanaged to rope me into helping with our Beaver group. They have also had the opportunity to try a lot of different activities which they probably would have done without it.

Dd24 Choir when young (social event really, improved confidence speaking to others) , Air cadets from 14... loved the discipline, shooting, communications, travel to Gibralter..

DD23 netball and rounders. She is a senior school biology teacher, but helps run some clubs.

Thanks all

I have put DD in the Scouts waiting list. No idea how long the list is but apparently you can queue jump if parents are willing to volunteer which both DH and I would be.

DD loves to climb but no local wall sadly

Yes swimming is a non-negotiable life skill so I don’t count that as a hobby as such

Speaking as someone whose dc had a hobby that did indeed reach professional level... for most people, this is not the case.

Please just look on whatever hobby your dc does as just that - a fun hobby they like doing and with no specific aim in mind. Yes, the parent(s) pay for it, and yes, they have to facilitate the to and fro, but on the whole, just let them enjoy it for its own sake. If they like playing the violin for instance, great. But you as a parent are not paying for on-the-job training with the aim of them making a career out of it. And, it has to be said, the almost certain disappointment when it doesn't happen.

Don't fall into the trap of expecting a return on your investment.

My dd played hockey, she loved it and still plays her in 20s. Always gained confidence from the team environment.

Ice hockey for my DD. She's almost 18 and played since she was 8 - co-ed until 15, then on her high school girls' team for the last 2 years (we are not in the UK, but she would have played had we still been in the UK, as we lived in a town with a rink). She learned to be part of a team in a male-dominated sport, stand up for herself, and control herself, too. She's a girlie-girl but proper fiesty on the ice, which I absolutely love.

She also swam, danced, and did horse riding, but hockey was always her first love.

I would also echo @taxi4ballet's words in that you should look at it for the skills and fun your daughter gets out of it. I've seen many hockey parents try and push their kids too hard, and none of them were going to the NHL (or PWHL now for the girls).

Hockey
Rowing
Kayaking
Drama

Two dd's both doing different activities but have given then lots of confidence as well as improving their fitness. Except for drama, they are completely separate from school social groups. Another bonus now they are teens is that it keeps them away from screens. We are lucky to live nearby a river with access to two of the activities. Surprisingly rowing is the cheapest activity by far.

Music, both played multiple sports and learned about team work but music got them to year 12 (Australia). They also met a different group of people through music and made different friends.
always handy having multiple different groups of friends.

Horses. Just be poor for the rest of your life.

dts were in gymnastics until Covid, it was very obvious they weren’t going to make squad and they didn’t really like it much so it seemed pointless. I

I kmow this will get many horror responses but rugby. Dd3 dd3 and ds all playes and loved it... all 3 dds also loved sewing classes and uses it eegulsr.
For dd2 drawing classes
Music lessons for ds and dd3

Swimming is a life skill so this for sure. All my girls learned to crochet really randomly and love it.

Dd - scouts, still loves it, she's now a young leader, amazing life skills and opportunities.

Ds - music. He learned an instrument from age 7, now in a successful band. Learning to play taught him so much, made him a better student around, now he's in a band so close social/emotional friendships and travelling the country doing the thing he loves.

Dance

hand on heart can’t say rainbows/brownies/guides were of any importance - had many leaders, some great, some awful, but honestly was a way for the kid to kill time and she hasn’t taken anything significant from it.

Karate, piano and running.

Swimming. Not only is it a life skill, but also enjoyable and great for fitness and mental. Dd is now 14 and did lessons from age 4, and is now on a swimming club and national squad.

Thanks all
I’m not a pushy parent and not bothered about DD competing or being the best . I just want her to do something that she really benefits from.

Rugby is a brilliant choice! Such a social environment too.