I am NEVER giving anything away again.

[Ohjakestopbeingatwat]

I’ve had it now with giving things away. I think I am just a twat magnet.

I put the children’s old wooden play market/kitchen thing up on Facebook, for free.

I put up photos and was very honest that it needs two new screws/wood glue as they have come loose and can’t be tightened, some of the paintwork is chipped, but if someone wants it, it would make a great up cycle project. If no one wanted it, it would go to the tip. But you know, it’s free and I know lots of people like a project.

Someone immediately said she wanted it and sent her husband to collect it a while later.

Then, all hell broke loose. She messaged me saying it was in a terrible state, the paint was chipped, the screws needed replacing - no shit Sherlock. That was the actual description.

She demanded that I come and pick it up. No. She kept on and on until I had to block her.

Half an hour later, her husband turned up again and threw it on my driveway, smashing it. So now, no one can have it to do up and it will have to go to the tip.

This isn’t the first time I’ve had shit like this. I don’t know how I attract these people. So never again. It’s the charity shop, or the tip.

By the sounds of it there are some more specialist sites for giveaways and upcycling. I’ve never used those. But Gumtree was as bad as FB when I tried it. And I suspect these upcycling sites are less popular because they’re mainly used by people who don’t bother taking things unless they can spot significant profit.

The problem generally is that many people are just not very nice. Trying to avoid sending things to landfill is unfortunately an invitation to crowds of these selfish graspers.

If charities have become picky businesses, and are wary of legal claims or the creep of ‘elf and safety law, there’s no longer any reason for bothering to pass on second hand goods.

Best just to go up to the dump and get on with life.

Someone asked me today to deliver a thing I’m giving away for free. They won’t tell me which village they live in just that it’s 10ish miles from my town. I’m not inclined to drive a 20 mile round trip to give something away!

oh OP, some people are just so unappreciative and think the world revolves around them. We recently moved and tried to give quite a lot of things away. We have so many requests to deliver, so many questions and complaints - it just wasn't my worth it in the end. What we did find though, with kids stuff, was that schools/ nurseries were often happy to take and repair. Members of staff were typically really appreciative and happy to collect/ fix. Might be worth considering if you do have big kids bits to pass on in future.

sometimes even token pricing does not work. And I really think it's because people are just fucking stupid.

I didn't want my enormous John Lewis Dante garden dining table and matching six (arm)chairs anymore. Its HUGE and was delivered on a bloody lorry, I mean it's a six seater dining table with six chunky armchair style chairs.

put it up on Facebook with photos with tape measure and dimensions written out - collection only for fifty quid as I figured my target market was small; only people with vans could possibly collect it.

A woman wanted it, said her husband would come by on Tuesday to collect at 16:30.

16:00 I get a text saying "husband says it won't fit in the car" (no shit???)

she then gets another car (Vauxhall zafria) and asks me will it fit in this (no you absolute %<|^).

she then arranges a van, but asks for money off because she's is having to arrange a van. Errr it's already dirt cheap and the fact you can't collect it is Not my problem. I don't owe you sh!t.

In the end I told her not to bother and someone else wanted it. (Plumber who turned up in his van with his missus and happily carted it off.)

I find that the majority of people who collect free stuff, are these who sell the items at car boot sales to make money. Maybe that was the case, with what had happened with OP. The person who collected, perhaps was hoping to sell the items in exchange for money.

MuffinsAreJustCakesAtBreakfast

…And I really think it's because people are just fucking stupid.

This

I’m fed up of this too.
I’ve posted free stuff on local Facebook pages - good stuff where I didn’t have the time or inclination to eBay etc.
People see free stuff as being of little value I think.

The usual is someone jumping on quickly and saying they’ll come to collect it, sending your details, getting a pick up time …then no show and ghosting!

I have one particular person who did this to me twice, I only realised when I messaged her. Again a no show. She’s tried to put her name against other items since but I just blank her now.

Then those who think you are Amazon and wanting a delivery!

I donate them to the charity shops now.

I just realised this makes no sense at all nowadays when you can get a second-hand laptop on eBay for pennies. Back then, it was more of a big deal, plus the one I gave her was new! I was definitely going through a bit of a phase of self-sacrifice in the hope that the moral brownie points would convince the gods to start smiling on me for a change. It didn't work, but I do have a brilliant life now (~25 years on) so maybe those karma cogs were just very slow to turn...!!!

People can be depressingly CFs though, whenever I read threads like this it reminds me why I'm glad not to be in a public-facing job 😖

They clearly need to learn to read! So sorry this happened to you 😕

Just leave stuff outside, someone will nab it

@Beachtastic I think something similar happened to me too, I gave away so much good stuff through lockdown. I bought new things for the immigrant DC, collected toys etc to drop at hotels, I sent a struggling MNetter money too.

My parents died 2020 and 21.
I think the madness was grief. I should have sold most of my stuff. 😅

I'm done now.

Ugh - that's a really horrible experience OP, not surprised you've come to that conclusion.

I am now pretty hard-nosed when it comes to facebook marketplace now. I have an account with a fake name and no photo; ask from earliest time they can collect when replying (easy way to spot if they have actually read the description); don't reply to rude/stupid messages - just delete and block; only give out my address an hour or so before collection arranged on confirmation. That has weeded out the time wasters/entitled/grabby quite nicely.

He sounds like Delboy - where their dear old late Mum's (ever changing) last words on her death bed always happened to be extremely specific in relation to what he wanted Rodney to do or accept at that particular moment!!

Isn't it interesting that his Dad's dying wisb wasn't that he should use whatever money he was able to bequeathed to him to buy a car; only that some random stranger would give him their already-cheap one for just a few quid?!

Someone picked up a free table that was in my conservatory, saw my large shoe rack and wanted that as well and was most upset that they couldn't have it

This is where they make it plainly clear how they view you.

You are not a kind person doing them a kind favour, for which they're very grateful; you're a seam of free stuff, no more important than a mine that somebody would smash into with a hammer or pickaxe to extract the gold or other valuable ore, load it into their barrow and walk away, considering it a job done well.

Isn't Gumtree meant for selling, rather than giving? Or is it both?

I always thought it was a competitor to eBay, rather than FreeCycle - although, of course, some people do list things as free on eBay and put a nominal penny in the 'buy it now' price section.

I think I've only ever used Gumtree once, as a buyer, years ago. Maybe they're trying to increase their exposure and user base now, as they've started advertising on TV a lot more - with their irritating little jingle where it sounds like they're singing "bum cheeks" rather than Gumtree

I'm so sorry about losing your parents. That whole COVID era was so traumatic.

I went completely mad, not sure why. I remember stuffing all my favourite clothes into a bag for some charity to collect from the driveway! Not expecting thanks was all part of the bizarre self-inflicted austerity, but the Freecycle laptop collection did make me blink a bit because she was so blasé about something I'd saved up for over months (!).

Here's to better self-care and a more profitable future 😉🌞

Thank you. 😊

@Ladedahlia
I had fond dreams of donating furniture to women who'd suffered domestic violence. Not a chance. They'd 'nowhere to store it.' Honestly, you can't win.

I also gave some very good quality clothes to DDs BFs mum for her younger sister. There was some amazing stuff and I could have sold or given to charity shop.
Instead of her little sister having the clothes having the clothes her BF decided she wanted to try and wear them, they were already too small for DD and her friend was considerably bigger.
So she tried them all on but couldn’t get them off, her mum cut her out of them one by one and then they put them all in the bin. It was so wasteful.

😖

Giving away free stuff is a nightmare. So many people dick you around.

It's as if an act of generosity results in people thinking 'there's plenty more where that came from' and they can't resist their impulse to exploit you.
Low impulse control correlates with low intelligence and so it stands to reason that Facebook will be disproportionately populated by persons who lack impulse control.

This is why reform are popular. About 80% of people are just 💩

Better still, write a note to say "please don't move this - it's awaiting collection from the buyer"

The temptation of getting for free something that someone else has paid good money for will be sufficient bait

I bin what i dont want.
I cant deal with faffing aroung selling and waiting.
Bin bin bin.