British weather on holiday with bored kids help

[Towelles]

On holiday in Norfolk with DH and SDC for a week. It’s overcast and windy. I am an outdoors person but SDC (primary aged) aren’t so we can’t do activities any water sports. They don’t really like walking far

The caravan park facilities are ok but the arcade and food is expensive. It’s too cold to swim in the pool longer than an hour. The on site park is shit. The beach is lovely but very windy and the kids are bored after an hour or so. There is evening entertainment so that’s all covered it’s the day times

We have been mostly driving around trying to find things to do. Went to a play park today with a zip wire that actually charged adults to go in and frankly it was a rip off.

We went to see the seals the DC thought that was boring.

I would be happy to do coastal walks or hire bikes I think it’s beautiful here

About to hire a boat to go on the broads (for ££££) (I would also like to walk around but I don’t think this will be popular) so basically it’s me sitting in the back of a boat watching the SDC argue about who is steering it

Can anyone suggest ideas?

we tried crabbing yesterday but the kids got bored as we didn’t catch anything

they then slept in till 10am so most of the day was gone by the time everyone got dressed

please help me save my sanity - is this going to just cost me £1,000 to make this week any good?

Nxt year I would get DH to take kids alone and perhaps have a holiday together minus kids later or alternate years. They sound like they are ungrateful and dad a bit ineffective. I can't see it getting any better. Do u have children of your own?

https://www.hillside.org.uk/shirehorsesanctuary.htm

this is so sweet this place

I am not at all familiar with the area you are in, but they obviously enjoy swimming. Is there a leisure centre close to where you are staying? Could you take them there one morning? If they have a couple of hours there and then you can find somewhere nice to eat and then go for a walk in the afternoon to get some ice cream or a treat?

is the forecast bad for the rest of the week? If so, I would consider coming back early and spending the rest of the week with them at home and doing things in your local area.

I do think their dad sounds quite miserable too and so the kids are probably picking up on that. As a family if we end up having a crap tine, the adults usually try and be as positive as possible, laughing and joking and after some sulking, the kids used to snap out of it and be happy to join in.

from what I have read, he’s expecting the children to be happy and having a good time and that might lift his mood but that’s not really fair on them. I feel bad for you as you sound like you are trying your best here but with little support from their dad

Agree with this!

If they like swimming book swimming at your park pool and let Dad go with them and you relax in caravan, at café, on seafront...whatever you want.
Give yourself a break...
Hope you don't mind me asking but is your relationship with them usually ok? Do they resent you at all?

Honestly I think there’s just a disconnect here between what you enjoy on holiday and what they enjoy on holiday. 39yo me loves a coastal walk. 10yo me would have enjoyed it for 5 mins and then got bored.

I think you need to find a balance, even if that means you doing some of the stuff you like while DP takes the kids to the cinema or to find a better pool or water park, treetop adventure course, spend some time in the arcades, go bowling, find a really big playpark. I think there is some looking at what would be fun for a child through a grown-up lens going on.

If I was you I would just let the kids go swimming as much as they want. At their ages I presume that they don't have to have an adult in the pool with them. So could one of you just take a book and watch and the other do their own thing for a bit?

Also agree theres a disconnect. I would never take my kids fishing, I find it boring but they would most certainly act like your SDC, as they would also be bored as fuck. We enjoy walks but dd2 doesn't love them she need encouragement of an ice cream or a picnic and a lot of cajoling.

They also would need someone to help keep them entertained on the beach, rounders, football or tennis. Dp and I would take turns going to the sea or playing games while the other sat off for a bit. They would do sandcastles but for a short time and often dd1 would want to do something different to dd2 so one of us would be in the sea and the other showing interest in shells and pebbles.

It sounds like you want to do different things on holiday, and you're giving dp and the kids a bit of a hard time. I agree he needs to step up a bit and engage them with activities, but as an adult on holiday with dc (any age and relation) I'd also be expecting to join in with encouragement and acitvities. Not walking miles ahead and ignoring them which is seems like you are doing.

They sound like a bunch of bratty wet blankets (inc DH) which is worrying with an 8 & 10 year old who should still be in a sweet spot of being children and fairly easy to entertain for another couple of years. They sound more like 14 year olds, and credit to 14 year olds, they're easier to leave to it to mope around for a while.

If DH isn't willing to see the problem and do some straight talking about expectations, you're stuffed.

I've got a 12 & 14 yo and there's a bit of reluctance there, but they normally ease out of it and begin to visibly enjoy themselves. There's compromise, notice and a bit of cajoling/ bribery/ threat in there. Tbh there's so much to do in Britain that even on our grottiest camping trips, there's always been plenty to do, and I've often found that easier than resort holidays abroard. We've been caught out by cold pools abroad too.

There's a place for arcades and pools, but they don't fill up a whole holiday even if the weather is more favourable.

How does your Dh react when they show so little enthusiasm? Does he chat to them, tell dad jokes, tease them?

TBH I would just hire those bikes. At least they are out, moving. Stop your Dh thinking that his kids moping means he needs to react to that. I’d stop trying to find so much kid-friendly stuff.

For walks, yes long ones can be a bit of an issue. Find something on the map (Roman site, old bridge, whatever) and walk to it - walks without some sort of objective are a bit dull at that age. Chat to your Dh, tell a few jokes. Model enjoying yourself.

It doesn't have to be 'holiday' activities.

What about a trip to the cinema? A zoo or wildlife park.

Maybe ask them what they want to do (that doesn't involve slots).

Tbh I think OPs attitude is the problem. She wants a very different holiday to the what the sdc want. She wants to be off doing what she likes and honestly doesn’t seem particularly in tune with kids.
One of our best holidays was a week in Norfolk. Absolutely hammered it down the first day and we got soaked but it was one of our best memories as we huddled in a cafe with coffee and cake. We spent a day on the boats on the Broads. Aviation museum. Bewilderwood. Did a safari at Watatunga park which was great. Holidays with kids are all about your attitude. They take work. And yes they are all expensive these days. Where have you been living these past years to not realize that?

Agree with @Notmyreality
Sounds like OP’s idea of fun is a get up and go type holiday; brisk walks, seal watching, enjoying the view etc. Whereas the DSC just want to chill by the pool, hang out at the amusements and watch the entertainment (rather than be the entertainment).

When you were marching off to the seals and they stopped on the way to play on the beach, why didn’t you enjoy that with them rather than insist your original plan had to be adhered too. You could have left them too it with their dad and carried on to see the seals by yourself if that’s your idea of fun. A few seals bobbing around in the sea really isn’t that exciting for more than a couple of mins and certainly wouldn’t get me racing along on a walk to see.

I’ve also done holidays in Norfolk when DS was a similar age. You just need to go with the flow and be prepared to change plans or explain why you’d really like to do something and that afterwards you’ll go get Icecream or go swimming etc.

what sort of hobbies and activities do the dsc do at home? Do they do anything when they are with their dad or tend to just do chill things?

You’ve had loads of good ideas here. I second those who have suggested bewildereood (take your own food as it’s very expensive there). We also enjoyed Africa Alive and the pier at Soythwold. There was a nice geocache there too.

We geocached a lot and it took us to interesting places. Look for ones with a lot of favourite points. Ds didn’t enjoy a walk but a walk with purpose and something to search for was infinitely more interesting. It also allows for different walking speeds. Ds is much faster than me and would be ahead hunting for the geocache while I was catching up. As he got older we swapped it out for playing Pokemon go on our walks. If you do want to geocache try a couple houses first as they’re not always easy to find and can be missing do check before you go.

Ultimately their dad knows them best and it sounds like he also doesn’t want a meticulously planned day with no deviations. Let him lead the way and if you want to do something different then go off and do it so they can enjoy their chilled out time at the pool and you get to do your thing. Once you chill out and stop trying to organise their fun you might find you and they start to enjoy your holiday a bit more too.

We played fucktons of monopoly on cold UK caravan holidays as a kid and card games…and ate ham sandwiches.

It sounds like all the activities they’re being made to do are your idea of what they should be doing, not what they actually want to be doing.

You say they love swimming and arcades so why aren’t they doing that? Take a drive somewhere and go to a swimming pool with flumes and a wave machine - they can do that for a day (or a good half day) and you can take the car and do something you want to do. Then pick them up after, fish and chips on a beach somewhere followed by the 2p machines in the afternoon. The fact that you can’t swim at the moment shouldn’t mean that the kids miss out.

Without meaning to sound horrible, I wouldn’t want to go traipsing round Norfolk walking and fishing with my step-mum at those ages either, and I’d probably be mortified if she was up and joining in with the entertainment 🫣

Just read all your responses OP. Honestly - all this suggest this, suggest that. They’re kids. Their default response is always “no” or a shrug of the shoulders. You’re the parent. You tell them what you are doing each day and then do it.
Planning. DH keeps saying what do you want to do…bloody hell did you really turn up without a plan? You’re the adults. Get together each evening and plan what you are doing the next day and book it. And you need a back up plan also.
The kids. They are 8 and 10. At that age they just want to do fun stuff. Don’t blame them. They have access to the pool? For them that will be the highlight. We would always do outings/activities in the morning and then come back late afternoon to go in the pool. So the kids always had to look forward to each day.
And the opening comment about the weather. “It’s overcast”. Shocking. How will you cope with such terrible conditions. It perfect weather for doing stuff. Honestly you need to understand and accept you are on holidays with kids. You want to do all the things you envisaged you need to take a separate kid-free break yourself.

As a step-parent, I would say: the kids are not your responsibility. They sound very annoying.

Take yourself off each day. "Tomorrow I'm going to leave at 10 for a long walk. You are welcome to join me! It'll take about 5 hours."

That's it. Your DH can deal with his own parenting. He might actually be better on his own and the kids will probably prefer not being judged all day (no offence - I did the same). Just let it go and you'll enjoy it more.

Maybe Southwold for the mini putting and model boat lake? Lowestoft roller skating? Cinema at Yarmouth, Norwich. Agree with ‘gamefying’ walks in some way.

I bet they still think they’ve had a good holiday.

Please read my posts I explained about swimming, you can’t just stay in the pool as long as you want, the swimming is in BLOCKS of time so you must get out for an hour or so after an hour. The pool is used for the kids club. We don’t put them into the kids club as highly unlikely they would get involved without a parent doing it too and it’s a club for kids and more £ down the drain. Plus it’s really cold so swimming is an hour max. I have already explained I think they need to just swim more I don’t have an issue, DP however makes them wait a whole day to swim so until the swimming happens they are our hostages. I DGAF that I can’t swim now, they can go without me?

They wanted to fish they asked for fishing nets so they were bought them. They do want to catch a fish they keep asking for it. But as it doesn’t happen quickly it causes an issue. So on a river stroll, they want to spend it dangling a net in. We have spent every day so far spending 10 mins here and there dangling nets in water and not catching anything and during this time I’ve seen other DC fishing and they are not as impatient.

All the suggestions are expensive because they are all involving entrance fees and we don’t have a ton of spare cash. We paid for Challenge Woods near Norwich based on its flashy website and what a goddamn rip off so now no one trusts anything we find. We tried to rent a boat - all sold out. Zoos and such like are close on £100 for a family of 4 to get in and not everyone has the budget for £100 x 7 days plus our food etc.

I don’t have an attitude problem - we are on a coastal and broads break and we have barely seen any coast or broads. My DP agreed to book this holiday with me, knowing what was involved and didn’t speak up about it not being a good idea. I genuinely think there is something wrong with people pointing the finger at me for being under the delusion that this is all the evil step mum fault, it’s the kids parents faults - I’ve been very clear, my DP is being a massive wet rag!!

Luckily you don’t have a clue what you are talking about. They asked me to get up and join in, then went and sat down. I’m not delusional enough to be barging my way onto the kids entertainment dance floor, uninvited for absolutely no reason but crack on if that’s what you think.
they asked for fishing nets and we are on a coastal and broads break. This usually involves being around water, outside, not inside a cinema. It’s windy and can be slightly chilly but it’s August - kids being outside in August on a holiday is not a shocking expectation. It’s very indicative of DC who spend far too much time indoors on devices. It’s NOT POSSIBLE to be in the pool and arcade for 12 hours a day, so there will be times where they aren’t doing the exact activity they want to, but they do get to do it

Most indoors pools have booked timetables with slots - you don’t just stay in it as long as you fancy. It’s not a whole day activity

@Towelles the thing is, the approach you have at the moment is making everyone miserable and snappy - so something needs to change. People can only make suggestions based on what you post - we’re not mind readers and can’t be expected to know every single conservation that’s happened so far.

If I were you I would just go out for the day and leave them to it. You’re clearly miserable and not having a good time so go off and spend the day doing whatever it is you fancy. Let your DH spend time with his kids and deal with them alone.

We took my 13 yr old ds to the Isle of Wight the year after Covid. Set our expectations before we went as his older brother wasn’t joining us, we explained we would do stuff he would like - water park etc but also go to old houses etc. Thought he would be bored but he was honestly a joy to be around, loved osbourne house, loved a walk, loved exploring a new place with us.
I think op that you cannot win with these kids and that next year you need to reconsider if you go away with them and their dad.
They sound like they need a good talking to and that shouldn’t come from you.
please remember it’s your holiday too so if it’s a walk you want then do it! Leave them behind with their dad. You will enjoy it so much more!
how much longer do you have?
we once went to mini golf somewhere in Norfolk…….

I adore Norfolk, it's where my Dad is originally from. Cromer, Sheringham, Wells, Norwich, Wroxham. What is your husband doing about his whiny children? At this age, they shouldn't be finding these things boring! It would be a case of 'suck it up buttercup', and taking them out for walks etc. They might actually enjoy it. After all the holiday is for you all, it shouldn't be the adults bending over backwards for the children all the time. The children need to learn compromise and understand that not all activities can revolve around them. If that means they sulk or whine, then it's down to your husband to read them the 'riot act'. It's not all about them!!

It doesn't sound like you like the kids very much.

Your idea of a good holiday is outside walking. Their idea of a good idea would be swimming all day, arcades and down/screen time. I'm not really sure what's wrong with that?

You, both of you, picked the wrong uk holiday for the kids so their bored. And the weather is bad so frankly your sulking (walking off and leaving under 10s behind, yuck, would be over for me)

The only one coming out of this looking decent are the kids. Find a local swimming pool, packed lunch settle there for the day.

@tumblingdowntherabbithole you just need to read my posts. I’m not asking anyone to mind read, you are getting defensive as you waded in very overly sure of yourself without reading all my posts. I had already gone over most of this. These kids aren’t going without anything whatsoever.

@Icedlatteplease

We are on a UK break in August - it is perfectly reasonable to expect that we do some relaxed, free or cheap outdoor activities and very unreasonable to expect me to pay hundreds more £ to stop them from being bored every second of the day. This trip has already cost us close to £1k. I’ve changed up all my Tesco club card vouchers I spent all year saving up for to pay for tickets for things. I’m not prepared to pay more and more and more (where does it end), there is a beautiful (free) beach a few hundred meters away from where we are staying and we have only been on it once!

Their dad agreed to come on this trip so HE is responsible for them