How do you get anything done with kids?

[CreativeNest]

I have a 13 month old. The most I can cook while looking after her is a 20 minute pasta dish. She starts getting fussy and needs my attention. When it comes to cleaning the house i have to do the bare minimum. If I try and do something like organising part of my wardrobe again (basically extra tasks) she gets bored even if I've given her toys to play with. She only plays a few minutes and then is over it. I used to enjoy baking but baking can take hours so I can't do that anymore. She won't even let me work out. Im 10 minutes in and then she starts getting fussy and coming up to me. How do you do anything with a toddler?

Pop her in the high chair? Mine used to be stationed in the kitchen watching me whilst I did things like cooking or hanging up washing.

Mine used to love helping me do baking!
I had 12 months between my youngest, sit them in the high chair and they’d be happy once they got used to it and knew what we were doing

Nope, I had 2 of these and honestly my most ambitious activities are now broken down into 20 minute chunks. I have ro break basic tasks into sections and do them over a few days.

I think this is par for the course with a young toddler. I have three children and I find the 12-18m (ish) stage the hardest - they are dangerously mobile yet kind of senseless!

We had a toy kitchen in the kitchen that they liked to “cook” with whilst I was cooking (only one of mine would have sat in a high chair or joined in at 13m). If doing another task, like wardrobe organisation, could you whip out a big cardboard box for her to play with? That would usually buy me some time! Other than that, my only advice is to do all your organising next year when it will be 1000 times easier.

Talk to her as you do stuff. Put her a high chair to watch. Given her a pan and a few wooden spoons to play with. Include her in the work out or do it when she naps. Babies can be occupied by surprisingly simple things if you can be at bit inventive. She is very young and her attention span will get longer.

You get used to an hour long task taking the whole day.
Someday it's better than others and it does get easier.
Give you little one a task that is "part" of the job you want to do. Organising parts of the wardrobe, get her to take things out and put things in a container even if it's putting a ton of socks in a place she can reach and having her put them in a hamper or shoe box. Even if you have to then tidy that up later.
I personally loved baking and used to do it a lot pre kids but hated it when the kids were young but when I did (or just general cooking) she used to sit on the counter and eat chunks from the butter... let her mix some spare flour and water in a bowl if you don't want her mixing the actual food.

Be prepared for more mess with any task, and stopping every 10 minutes, and for it to take longer than you'd want, otherwise you're just setting yourself up for frustration

Working out you have to time perfectly, personally for me ut was before the first nap time but after her breakfast - normally snack time, bunch of snacks on the sofa, a few toys and again, be prepared to stop every 10 minutes. Then when nap and snack time changed I used to have to get up even earlier and do it then, which works best now that they're older too.

@CreativeNest youll have lots of replies saying “pop her in the high chair” or “pop her in the sling” or “get her to help you with chores.

you either have one of these children or your don’t. It’s nothing to do with parenting, it’s temperament. Some toddlers are fussy rage infused volcano hurricanes that you literally cannot achieve anything with. Unless they’ve had one, people may say “oh I just go about my day and they fit in”.

Ive had one of each, both parented the same, and it blew my mind how easy the second one was. If the first hadn’t taught me humility, I’d be a smug arsehole about how easy parenting was.

I have a 7 mo and can't get anything done. We are moving house in a few weeks so have been trying to pack and she is making it impossible. Any task whether it's packing, showering, cooking, cleaning is done with her screeching at me for attention. I have resorted to doing the bare minimum. The only thing she doesn't mind watching me do is hanging up the washing outside

In all honesty I don’t think I’d get anything done if my 18 m/o didn’t go to nursery a couple of days a week. He is very active and a danger to himself. My (now) 4 year old at the same age would happily sit and play and let me get on with things.

Nap time?

You either have one of these children or your don’t. It’s nothing to do with parenting, it’s temperament. Some toddlers are fussy rage infused volcano hurricanes that you literally cannot achieve anything with. Unless they’ve had one, people may say “oh I just go about my day and they fit in”

This this and this. I couldn’t get anything done with DC1. I used to force him into the high chair while I cooked when he was a young toddler, but he’d scream and cry and throw things the whole time. He hated any form of constraint. To be honest, at 13 months he hated being in the house for much more than an hour, he just wanted to be go go go. The thought of trying to bake with him is laughable.

If it’s any consolation, he’ll now sit and do Lego for hours while I get stuff done.

I have one of these, wouldn’t sit still for 30 seconds. If I turned my back he’d be on the kitchen table or climbing a bookcase.
Now 2 and still a bit of a challenge but getting better as able to entertain himself with toys for slightly longer.

I used to do these things when I really needed to do something (still do really), short bursts at a time, run during naps (sometimes he ran with me!), bring out toys he gang seen for a while so he’d get excited and be busy for a bit. Now he’s a bit better he cleans when I clean (his cars in a bowl of water or whatever), or ‘folds’ washing with his own mini pile of his socks or something.

it is hard, I used to sing a lot while cooking and be a sort of crazy entertainer to stop the yelling.

Sympathy though! It’s hard going.

I feel your pain. They are all different, and whereas one will sit happily for a while, the next just won't. I had 5 under 10, and for a while our lounge did not have anything in almost at all, apart from two sofas, a rug, a TV (solidly out of reach) and a few sticks of non-climb-able furniture (i.e. low drawers with drawer locks). I used to do my jobs when they were not there (or mainly not there) and I used to have a nap on the sofa in the same room as them when they were all fed, happy and watching something on TV (and before anyone does me down, I was not getting sleep at night, and using their sleep times to do other life-admin, cleaning, batch cooking, washing, and paper-admin that everyone needs to do). People say "I can't nap" - believe me you can if you are knackered enough. We also used to go out for a walk after work a few nights a week, mainly just to the supermarket with a double pushchair and the others in tow. Buy essentials, stick them under the pushchair, but also we would buy a 6 pack of fruit shoots and snack bars or doughnuts, and that would keep everyone happy. I realise that you just have the one but they can be JUST as time consuming as 5, sometimes even more so because some of them used to amuse the others for a while. My top 5 tips would be 1) Do the bare minimum that you have to do and don't give two hoots what others think 2) Make at least some rooms, or a room into a completely safe space and let them be in it (albeit sometimes with TV on or toys) it is helpful if they can amuse themselves for a while 3) On the same theme, cycle toys - they will play with a new (to them) thing for a quite a while, if they get all their toys constantly then they quickly bore of them all. 4) Get out - your new exercise routine might not be like your old one, and you might need to be inventive, but can work if you want it to, it also tires them out. 5) Once a week, go to softplay or somewhere else you like that they love, pay the money, get yourself a coffee, get your laptop out to do life's admin, while they interact with other children and although there is no doubt that you will hardly be able to get stuff done for a long duration, you can usually do a few jobs, answer emails and so on. Sorry I have rambled, but I do really understand how hard it is xx

Yep!! DS1 might have sat for 10 mins with food to entertain him (on a good day). DS2 will have escaped from the highchair and disappeared down the road if I turn my back for 30seconds.

Well said.

It's nigh impossible to get a task finished when you have a walking/ crawling baby to supervise at the same time. I had a husband who didn't understand this and whined endlessly about chores half done. The twat used to take it upon himself to 'show me' how I should do it at weekends. The DCs would all end up on the couch crying as he worked like an angry human tornado - no thanks, I wasn't his mother, who did it that way and whose house was spotless, a show home.

I ended up putting DC4 into a hiking baby carrier on my back just so that I could cook a simple pasta dinner, which I did with my hair held tightly in her sweaty little fist.

My house is a bombsite because of my dc , I can only get stuff done while they are asleep. If I need to deep clean/ sort seasonal clothes etc I need to take a day off work while they are at nursery. Otherwise it just doesn't happen.

Cooking id put them in highchairs give them a snack, talk to them about what im doing sing songs, dance just basically entertain them as im cooking. House work id get them to help yes it would take twice aslong but it meant things got done.

Can’t do anything with kids like you expect without them…. Enjoy them being there and adapt… working out you can dance/ exercise with kid stuff…… if your goal is to have a beautiful house and do the washing and you can’t because the child is ruining that then child has to go to nursery because you need to not be there