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Original poster

Can I go to a restaurant and not order anything?

55 replies

BabyDoge · 17/08/2025 08:51

Seven of us are due to go out for lunch today to celebrate my grandma's 90th birthday. Typically my IBS is horrendous this morning, I've barely been off the toilet. I would still like to go to the celebration but I know if I eat whilst I'm there I'll start the whole thing off again.

Given that there'll be six other people ordering food do you think they'd be okay with me not ordering anything? Or is that still a no-no? It's a gastro-pub type place, if that makes any difference.

OP posts:
Original poster
BabyDoge · 17/08/2025 09:53

vickylou78 · 17/08/2025 09:45

Can you just order a drink and a just a side maybe (was thinking maybe a bowl of fries or bread & butter as would be bland and maybe your stomach would handle it? Or does carbs set it off?) . Otherwise I think ordering a drink would be fine.

Yeah I'm thinking this might be the way to go, I seem to be okay with unseasoned carbs so if they'll let me I can just order a couple of sides.

Now I wonder if my grandma will mind me making a chip butty 😅

OP posts:
Original poster
BabyDoge · 17/08/2025 09:54

Yiayoula · 17/08/2025 09:51

You are the customer, OP !
Stand firm , say you’re not able to eat but would love a (drink of choice).
Stomach issues here too, I’ve done this quite a few times and nobody bats an eyelid.
Hope you all have a wonderful time !

Thank you, that makes me feel a bit more confident.

OP posts:
Fitzcarraldo353 · 17/08/2025 09:57

I've done this loads of times without a second thought. Just order a drink. I have allergies and back when restaurants were far less knowledgeable than they are now I used to go out with friends and never order food. Not a problem at all. I still do it occasionally if people are going somewhere I don't feel is safe for me. It's not awkward and no one will care.

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General health
Thingyfanding · 17/08/2025 09:58

Just out of interest, have you tried the FODMAP diet? It’s very effective for Ibs and recommended on the NHS.

As for not ordering - it’s perfectly fine. You don’t need to order anything as others will be eating. Just order a drink and don’t think any more about it.

sillysmiles · 17/08/2025 09:59

BabyDoge · 17/08/2025 09:31

My family are quite understanding so that should be okay. I know they'd prefer I came and didn't eat rather than cancelled.

Show quote history

If that's the case,then definitely go. The staff won't care. Just state clearly when ordering that your just having a drink and not ordering food.
Don't over think it. Don't order just to make the staff feel more comfortable. That's crazy!

SociableAtWork · 17/08/2025 10:00

It’s completely ok to not order anything.

As an aside, when my IBS was bad I found ‘real’ tonic water helped - it contains quinine which can settle all kinds of stomach issues. Not the diet version and not a cheapy that used flavouring instead of quinine.

Also @BabyDoge - my IBS improved masssively when I started eating Skyr whipped up with Flax Seed Oil. Works just as well with real Greek yogurt also (not Greek Style). The improvement was miraculous.

Overwhelmedandunderfed · 17/08/2025 10:00

Could you call ahead and ask? Surely at a table of 6 drinking a couple of drinks would be okay. I hope you have a nice day. My family would be a nightmare trying to convince me to eat but hopefully yours are more understanding!

LastKnownSurvivor · 17/08/2025 10:06

BabyDoge · 17/08/2025 09:04

Do you know, it didn't even occur to me to order a starter and then give it to someone else. I think cos if I'm paying for it I at least want to eat it 😅

Show quote history

Ask if anyone is having one anyway and would mind you giving the order?

My go-to for IBS is codeine.

Original poster
BabyDoge · 17/08/2025 10:11

Thingyfanding · 17/08/2025 09:58

Just out of interest, have you tried the FODMAP diet? It’s very effective for Ibs and recommended on the NHS.

As for not ordering - it’s perfectly fine. You don’t need to order anything as others will be eating. Just order a drink and don’t think any more about it.

Yes it used to be fairly well controlled on low FODMAP, but now I've no idea what my trigger foods are anymore because I'm all over the place.

My GP is going down the mental health route at the minute, because it seems to be less what I'm eating and more what am I doing that day, how important is where I need to go.

OP posts:
Original poster
BabyDoge · 17/08/2025 10:13

SociableAtWork · 17/08/2025 10:00

It’s completely ok to not order anything.

As an aside, when my IBS was bad I found ‘real’ tonic water helped - it contains quinine which can settle all kinds of stomach issues. Not the diet version and not a cheapy that used flavouring instead of quinine.

Also @BabyDoge - my IBS improved masssively when I started eating Skyr whipped up with Flax Seed Oil. Works just as well with real Greek yogurt also (not Greek Style). The improvement was miraculous.

Interesting, do you have IBS-D or C? I give DD flaxseed when she's constipated so I'd be a bit worried taking it for my diarrhoea...

OP posts:
FiveBarGate · 17/08/2025 10:13

I'd just be careful saying 'stomach issues '. Not that you have to give a reason at all but saying something like you need to do FODMAP is probably better.

If someone sat drinking only water and said 'stomach issue ' I'd be worried they meant D&V and be giving them a wide berth!

Mulledjuice · 17/08/2025 10:16

Definitely call ahead and ask what they might be able to do for you that would meet your needs. Just say ('ongoing medical condition that restricts my diet" if you don't want to say "IBS").

I think it's a bit off not to order anything and not have given the establishment a chance to cater for you.

YourSpryWriter · 17/08/2025 10:18

You don't have to order anything. My friend was on a liquid diet for medical reasons and we went out for my birthday. There was only two of us and she was quite happy sat there with a drink while I had my dinner. The restaurant were fine with it and to be honest we never thought about it being a problem because I was eating.

PastelCat · 17/08/2025 10:27

If there’s six other guests the restaurant won’t care. Just say you have a digestive disorder and order what you want, mineral water or carbs etc…You have my full sympathy, I’ve been in this position many times. The fear of setting off symptoms, wanting to join in but having to watch others eating delicious things. If your GP is stumped look into SIBO. I’d never heard of it till a friend was diagnosed, now looking into it myself.

Original poster
BabyDoge · 17/08/2025 10:37

PastelCat · 17/08/2025 10:27

If there’s six other guests the restaurant won’t care. Just say you have a digestive disorder and order what you want, mineral water or carbs etc…You have my full sympathy, I’ve been in this position many times. The fear of setting off symptoms, wanting to join in but having to watch others eating delicious things. If your GP is stumped look into SIBO. I’d never heard of it till a friend was diagnosed, now looking into it myself.

Thank you that looks interesting, especially about the vitamin deficiencies as I've recently been diagnosed with a few of them.

OP posts:
QuantumPanic · 17/08/2025 10:39

Totally fine. I have done it and have not explained myself to staff, nor did I feel particularly awkward not eating while everyone else was. Enjoy the celebration!

Johaanah · 17/08/2025 15:44

I do this quite often when friends are meeting up, I’ll usually arrive a bit later than they do and I’ve never had a problem just ordering a drink. Friends know I won’t be eating and I just go for the company rather than the food.

PurpleThistle7 · 17/08/2025 16:45

I had a serious food allergy so while I try to do my research ahead of time, sometimes I can’t or won’t eat anything at a restaurant. In a group it’s totally fine and no one has ever said anything about it.

CountryQueen · 18/08/2025 09:02

It’s not weird. Just order a drink

DancingLions · 18/08/2025 10:05

With regards to your IBS, google "low dose naltrexone for IBS". Lots of research/discussion on it out there.

I had awful IBS for years. Every time I left the house, I'd need imodium (which didn't always work). I always had to carry spare clothes because of frequent accidents. Couldn't go anywhere without there being a toilet nearby etc. Even at home I wouldn't always make it to the loo. It was awful and so depressing. I tried everything over the years, nothing worked.

Naltrexone has cured it for me 100%. It's been a miracle for me. I can eat what I want, leave the house and go out and about like a normal person. I've been given a whole new life.

HerewardtheSleepy · 18/08/2025 10:38

Just because you order it doesn't mean you have to eat it. Get the cheapest thing on the menu and push it around the plate for a bit.

(Fellow IBS sufferer here)

Original poster
BabyDoge · 18/08/2025 13:09

DancingLions · 18/08/2025 10:05

With regards to your IBS, google "low dose naltrexone for IBS". Lots of research/discussion on it out there.

I had awful IBS for years. Every time I left the house, I'd need imodium (which didn't always work). I always had to carry spare clothes because of frequent accidents. Couldn't go anywhere without there being a toilet nearby etc. Even at home I wouldn't always make it to the loo. It was awful and so depressing. I tried everything over the years, nothing worked.

Naltrexone has cured it for me 100%. It's been a miracle for me. I can eat what I want, leave the house and go out and about like a normal person. I've been given a whole new life.

That sounds wonderful, I'll definitely look into that thank you.

OP posts:
mondaytosunday · 18/08/2025 13:19

Order a drink at least - more for you to have something for your hands to do.

mathanxiety · 18/08/2025 13:20

Order a starter but don't eat it.

itsgettingweird · 18/08/2025 13:24

I have tummy issues. In that instance I just order a coffee and ask for it very hot and so I drink it slowly as everyone else eats!

Sometimes I’ll get soup depending on what type it is. Tomato or chilli based ones would be a no. Plain veg I’d be ok.