I really want to do things like go to the gym, retrain in a new career, study new things.
I sign up. I pay for courses. I lay the foundations.
But I never do it. I just feel safer in my bed or at home doing nothing beyond the basics of housework, employed work, cooking and ferrying my DCs to their activities and friends.
I do get frustrated and upset that I seem unable and unwilling to change. I want more. I just can’t get onto it.
I feel like such a loser at 54. Everyone else is achieving and moving in and up. I am not.
Is it a mental illness? Having all these intentions and not doing anything.
Even now, I should get up, make soup, go to the gym etc but I am in bed rot after a crap night of sleep with an unwell ds.
Anyone else a chronic procrastinator but frustrated by it. I will be 65 one day and nothing to show for it.