I find it extremely hard to find any happiness in anything now. I feel the need to have absolutely everything the way my brain tells me it needs to be, if I’m out and remember I need to hoover, for example, I just cannot stop thinking about it and I will begin to really feel disgusting, it almost feels as though someone is there alongside me just bullying me and telling me awful things about myself and my life. I can’t stop spiralling about my life, my future, and how I’m not doing enough and I will waste my life and will die and lose my chance, although rationally I know I can’t do anymore.
I feel like I need to go to talk to somebody about it and get it sorted out, it’s ruining my life and I’m concerned it will ruin my relationships.
Everything is constantly racing through my thoughts and it feels so intense, but then as soon as I try to write it out or talk to anyone about it, it’s like I just can’t think about what to say.
please help