How old for ear piercing?

[Confessionsofashopoholic]

My daughter is 5 and has been asking for her ears to be pierced for about a year now. I said in the summer holidays she could have them pierced but now I’m worried it’s too young. What is the general sort of age that people have taken their children to get their ears pierced, is 5 too young?

I allowed it in year 6 at Christmas.

Agreed

Personally end of year 6 at the earliest. I don’t think before then most children are capable of caring for them well enough.

and if you insist on doing it in primary school then please take them out on Pe days before coming to school

This is the one thing I am embarrassingly snobby about and feel that any pre teen girl with earrings in looks awful!

DD was 5 got it done at the being of the summer holiday last year. Also made a little spray bottle with tea tree oil that she sprayed on her ears every morning and every night for the first 2 months or so never had a problem

So you think entire cultures and countries look trashy? Interesting.

Honestly? I struggle to understand the cultural importance of piercing babies and young children’s ears, yes.

My daughter had hers done at 11, she asked for it a few years ago and I said she could have it done the summer before starting secondary school. No real reason for it but I stuck with it and I’m glad I did. She’s cleaning the piercings fine by herself but despite that we had to dash back to the piercing place last week due to swelling, it wasn’t infected but one had swollen to the point the stud was going to get embedded. She’d dealt with it fine now but a few years ago it would have been a nightmare.

I don’t judge people for having their kids ears pierced when they’re young but I do judge them for taking them anywhere that uses a gun like Claire’s, Superdrug or anywhere that let’s teenagers pierce your ears after a couple of hours training. Whatever you do take her to a licensed piercer who will use a needle and give correct aftercare advice (which isn’t twisting it everyday!)

I've told my daughter she can before high school. She's currently 9 and would struggle with caring for them, changes her mind about thinks quite frequently, and would definitely lose them when taken out. Other 9 year old's might be different though.
My mum said I had to wait until 16. I think I was 15 (might have been 14) when I told the piercer I was 16 and got it done anyway. Mum wasn't happy but didn't make me take them out.

This is what I've told DD. It's still 4 years away and she's not happy about it but I'm holding firm on it. And crop tops and a phone!

If you have any sense, not before secondary school. I have put up on these pages before the information from a surgeon from Newcastle hospital on radio 4, who said if parents had seen as many torn ears or ingrown earrings as he had dealt with, then wouldn’t have dreamt of letting their young children have pierced ears, and he implored the listening parents not to have their children’s ears pierced a moment before they were at least twelve and preferably older.

My 5yr old just had hers done. She’s also been asking for over a year. I’ve been trying to put her off telling her it’ll be sore, I have to clean them and that can be sore etc. She’s adamant that was ok. So she got them done. She was super brave and didn’t cry or anything. She reminds me all the time about cleaning her ears and they’ve healed amazingly. My eldest dd got them done a little older and hers took a long time to heal. She’s now wanting second ones done, I’ve told her maybe when she’s a bit older. Like high school age but she has 2 friends that have had them done so now she keeps asking why she can’t get them done again too.

10 or 11. Younger than that looks really tacky and 5 or 6 is grim. I am happy to be judgemental about this.

Do you always do what your 3 year old wants? 3 year old has no idea of the implications or how they'll feel when they're older. It is the responsibility of the parent to protect their child. They might 'want' to live on chocolate and chips, or jump into a canal. I know that's not the same as having ears pierced, but the principle remains - the decision is the adult's responsibility, not the child's.

@tumblingdowntherabbithole You keep asking the same question. Which countries and cultures are you thinking of. In many European countries it's seen as a sign of low class, as it is here.

I was 7 when I had mine done ,
a million years ago as a reward for being brave (
operation ) .
My daughter was just 6 but had been asking for ages , she was very grown up though, looked after them herself and takes them out the day she has PE at school etc .

You need to figure out if letting piercings heal properly can actually fit into your life. For example our primary insists on earrings being taped up - and my DD has PE twice a week. Taping can hurt ears if not done well. My DD does karate - more taping them up. I asked our piercer when she can start leaving them out for short periods and he said it's best to leave them as long as possible. She got hers pierced at easter (age 10), we got them changed by the piercer to a new pair in June, and we're going to start changing them ourselves before school returns, with the hope she can take them out just for PE lessons.

The fact that you struggle to understand something doesn't make it trashy, though.

There are lots of countries (and cultures) where babies get their ears pierced before they even leave the hospital. There are cultures where stretched ears and lips etc. are of huge cultural signficance.

The whole "it's low class" or "trashy" bollocks is just snobbery and ignorance.

I was 16 so I have said 16 to both my son and daughter. I could be convinced to allow earlier but niether have pushed it yet.

imo they need to be mature enough to manage the cleaning and to be aware of infection risk. so 16 - possibly earlier if they can convince me!

I’ve also suggested it is done at the very start of the school summer holiday - or close to end of summer term - so ears have time to heal before going back and sports start up again which might require taping up or ear rings removed.

I agree with this. My DD wanted her ears done but I made her wait until she was old enough to look after them herself. Had them done the last day of primary school.

When they are an adult and competent to make this decision, so 18.

Totally agree.

Mine had theirs done when they were both 7 after asking for a while and me believing they were old enough to look after them. In hindsight it was probably a year or two early. Whilst they kept them clean (with lots of reminders), they did/do so much sport they were constantly taking them out and putting them back in was not always easy. I think if we'd waited until 10/11 they would have been better equipped at handling and wearing them than they were at 7. But saying that, no real harm done, they looked lovely and they enjoyed picking a new pair of earrings most days. So I'd say 5 - almost certainly too young, 7 - probably too young, 9+ probably about the right age (if she's still keen).

I think 6-7 is fine for some kids. You know your daughter better than anyone else. What’s her tolerance to pain like, would she sit still or panic, would she understand how to keep them clean and minimise infection risk? Others would need to be much older, like many of these things there is no one size fits all rule.

I’d say it depends on the rules at school too. Our primary school are fine with studs even for PE so there would be no messing around taking them in or out.