What would you do? - moving

[stressedatbestt]

Okay so I’m staying with family with my three children in one room as I’m caring for them.
My sister died recently and suddenly and my mum who I’m caring for at the moment doesn’t want me to move away too.
I need to move soon, for my own sanity and the fact my children need their own space.
I have two options and I’m torn.

option 1) go to the council - London based. They’ve informed me they’d take on full housing duty but I’d be in temp housing nearby my area as I am a carer. My kids wouldn’t have to change school and my mum wouldn’t be on her own in London.

option 2) private rent up to an hour away from London, nice area for my children to live. I’d move school and have a fresh start, it’s more affordable too. I’ve told my mum I’d visit every weekend and one day during the week when my kids were at school as my son has sen so I am his carer too and unable to work.

my mum really doesn’t want me to move, she is always saying she will be here alone, my kids won’t like a new school etc. I’m just form part of me wants a fresh start away from this area where my sister passed and part of me is scared as I’m all alone. No other family or many friends.

please be kind

First I’m sorry for your loss, what a devastating shock to lose your sister. You’ve got a lot on your plate.

I vote Option 1. You and your mum are grieving and you need each other. Are you caring for her for the foreseeable future or is it a short term thing?

I would vote Option 2 if your mum would agree to move with you. Is there any chance she’d move?

Can your mum move?

I’m also just wondering if throwing yourself on the mercy of private renting is the best plan - so many people I know have had a massive rent hike, I wonder if you might be more vulnerable if you rented ?

temp housing - unless you know it’s good quality you would be better going with option 2.

especially if you invite mum

Are you looking to move away from your mum OP? You talk about a fresh start.

I’ve always invited my mum, she’s quite stubborn and says she wants to stay here. She’s in secure council housing, it’s a one bedroom so me and the kids are in the living room.

I have invited her to swap / move wherever I go. She has cancer so she has been quite unwell. I was planning to move 45-1 hour away so I can stop visit easily during the week when the kids are at school.

thanks for your responses this far. I’m slightly worried as I’ve heard temp isn’t great around here and they’re moving people up to 45 mins away anyway.