I wanted to write an honest account of how I feel about my lovely mum. Despite the below, she really is lovely!
I have a great relationship with my parents who are now in their mid 70s. We’ve recently lost relatives from their generation which has made me realise I need to cherish and soak up as much time with them as possible.
However, my mum can be infuriating! One on one, she’s ok but you add any other people, DH, DB, our kids to the mix and she seems to be unable to listen, hold a conversation or check what she’s saying before it comes out of her mouth!
She interrupts mid conversation constantly. We honestly can’t get through much of a back and forth around the table before she cuts across with something completely different. She’s does this every time conversation flow happens
When talking to her, if something pops into her head she is incapable of keeping that thought to herself until you’ve finished talking and almost has to spit it out, cutting over you. It can be related but is often something random that she’s thought of. And if she does manage to let you finish you can see the exact moment she’s stopped listening to you and is thinking about what she wants to say.
She says what’s in her head often without giving any thought to it and nit picks at tiny details-always sees the faults rather than any positives. Example, my brother has just moved house with his family. It’s a beautiful new home and her first comment when walking through the door was how terrible the decor was and when was he going to strip everything back.
She worries a lot and this can mean she catastrophes any situation. When we planned years ago to get a dog and told her she looked terrified and listed all the reasons it would be a bad idea and how would we cope. It sucks any enjoyment out of sharing news.
However, in spite all of this, she is the most wonderful mother and her INTENT is never to do this. She is wholly selfless and if any of her family ever needed anything she’d drop whatever she was doing and be there. She has a wonderful sense of humour and loves largely and fully.
Im struggling to want to spend time with her as a family because of the above but I know if I ever told her this, it would break her heart and she’d be devastated.
Any suggestions on how I address this with her in the right way or just swallow it up!!