We see my 3 year old grandson and my daughter roughly every 3 months due to distance, and that is lovely. They stay with us for several days before going home.
Until last week we had a lovely little cat, that our grandson liked to stroke and that he used to look for when he stayed, but unfortunately she became very ill and we had to have her put down.
What do we say to him if he asks where she is? Before anyone asks - I have, of course, asked my daughter what she would like me to say but I haven't had an answer yet. How have you introduced the subject of death to a 3 year old? Do I even say anything? I don't want to lie and say she has gone to stay somewhere else or anything like that.
With my older grandchildren when their great-grandmother died their mother told them, and if they asked me about it (and they did) I answered all their questions quite truthfully.
'Are you sad?' - yes I'm very sad and I miss her a lot
'why did she die' - she got very ill and couldn't get better.
'Will I ever see her again?' - no we will never see her again
'what happened to her when she was dead' - well, when somebody dies the bit that is them leaves the body behind, so her body was cremated because she didn't need it any more (Cue explanation of that!) but we don't really know what happens to the 'bit that was them' that was inside their body. Some people call it their soul and believe that it goes to heaven, and that's what I like to believe, but other people think other things. Some don't believe in the soul and think that you just go to sleep and don't wake up. Some people believe that your soul goes into a new body, and this could be a baby or an animal of some kind.
Now, the last bit is a bit much for the death of a pet. But - is it appropriate to talk about death with a 3 year old? How would you do it?