Commenting on your GPs weight

[helpidontknowwhatimdoing]

I am a GP and recently have lost quite a lot of weight due to illness. I was previously overweight (and am still overweight, just less so) and have had multiple patients in the last few weeks comment on my weight loss.
I would simply never comment on someone else’s body, even less so a professional person who I do not know personally. I find it utterly bizarre. Often it interrupts the consultation and I struggle to know how to respond.
I am genuinely curious if anyone would do this and if so why?

They all think you've been on the weight loss injections and are hoping you'll prescribe some for them! I hope you're getting back to full health now Op

It's rude to comment on someone's body whether they are a professional or not. People need to mind to their own business, it's weird and creepy to raise the subject unless the other person does first.

I wouldn't ever comment on someone's weight.

However, there have been posts on Mumsnet upset that no one has mentioned their weight loss. If you were overweight, then I can see why people might think you're on a health kick and would appreciate a compliment.

Everyone gets arsey around the subject of weight so that's why I wouldn't have mentioned it.

Not because of your job.

It is bizarre and incredibly rude. I have cancer. I’ve lost about 10 kg in the past 6 months. To be fair, I do look ‘healthier’ by our culture’s standards, even though the reason I’ve lost weight is because I’m ill (treatment side effects). People do comment on it. I’ve started making a joke that thankfully, I stay looking this good and don’t just die from the cancer.

I’ve lost four stone (mounjaro) and I cannot believe the comments. My boss brought it up in my appraisal 😳.

I had that at work when I did paleo. I rationalised that it says more about the other persons mindset. I would never make a comment on weight other than a generic 'you look well'.

I would consider it rude and inappropriate. Some people are just clueless and i am sure you know that by now as someone who works with the general public.

No way - what did your boss say??

I think people often think it’s a compliment. Most people are loosing weight purposely. Lots of people don’t think before they speak, it’s careless more than anything. I don’t think this has anything to do with you being a doctor or not though. You’re a person, like everyone else.

She said she has noticed I had lost a lot of weight and was it intentional and how had I done it.

It's not always rude. You'll see a lot of posts about people disappointed that nobody commented on their weightloss. Many people like compliments on their body, their hair, whatever. It does depend how well you know people of course and on the person.

@HollyhockDays

oh wow - not sure what I think about that. I guess checking that you’re not unwell is one thing but the rest could be classed as unprofessional.

How did you feel about it?

I'm going to be the first to say it......

Surely as a GP you comment on weight all of the time??

Why is it relevant that you are a GP in this situation rather than a butcher, baker or candlestick maker? Are you affording yourself some sort of superiority / status?

Not all the time but do bring it up if it's causing obvious problems and as an obese GP I had a lot of sympathy with my patients who were overweight and struggling. A lovely physio I saw said my knee pain wasn't the result of me being overweight (my comments) but that my muscles weren't strong enough to carry the weight. I'm a little lighter and a lot stronger now do knee pain has gone.

To the OP patients think they are best friends with us... especially if you've been in the same practice for 34 years as I had. They always comment on things. I just let it go over my head though if you've lost weight through illness I understand why you're upset.

They think it’s okay to mention it because you are their GP and know a great deal of personal information about them. They have unintentionally blurred the lines.

It wouldn't bother me if people mention my weight loss. Although I know these people they are not friends or family. Someone said "ooh, you've lost weight, I hope it was intentional". In other words I hope you have not lost weight because you are ill. Or someone would mention it and ask what is my secret which I quite happily give them a run down on Nutracheck. If I see someone who has lost a lot of weight I just say I didn't recognise you, you look different perhaps I usually see you in a work suit/wearing glasses/shorter or longer hair but I would know if it was weight loss through illness.

I struggle to know how to respond.

"I was ill but I'm better now. So, about the problem you have that you need help with..."

EDIT: quote dropped off! this was in response to the pp who said she would only ever say ‘you look well’ @SplashAndTurn

Not read the full thread yet, so apologies if it’s been mentioned, but this reminds me I’ve seen threads on here where multiple posters doggedly insisted that ‘You look well’ is code for ‘You have gained weight’ — and that EVERYONE knows this, even if we won’t admit it — and that ‘You look well’ is therefore never not a veiled insult.

Because people believe it’s a compliment. If you had worked hard to lose weight, then it’s nice when other people notice. Most people would be flattered and like the positive feedback after all their effort. Obviously as your weight loss is due to illness it has a different meaning to you but I’d not overthink it personally. It’s meant as a compliment.