Really obvious things you didnt teach your child (Lighthearted)

[Unorganisedchaos2]

Lighthearted, please don't come for me; I honestly do all the homework, reading etc just had a massive blind spot and looking to feel better.

DD6 had some homework this week to do her immediate family tree, lovely, she drew a big tree and we printed off some photos of everyone and it became clear that DD had absolutely no idea how all the random adults in her life were related 😅

She has a pretty typical set up 4 grandparents, 1 GGparent, 2 sets of 1 aunt and uncle and a couple of cousins, who we mix with at least weekly. I thought referring to my Mum as "Mum" for the past 6 years would have helped her make the connection but apparently not, bless her.

Anyway, it was an interesting learning activity and I think she's mostly grasped it now so no harm done ...right?

DD went to a small nursery in which all the children used the same bathroom and there was no bathroom door, presumably so the staff could supervise them. Therefore, DD frequently saw her peers of both sexes in the nude. But for some reason, she never put two and two together and realised which sex was which. She seemed to think that your sex was determined by the length of your hair and whether you had a boy's name or a girl's name. I left her to work it out by herself, but by the time she started school, the penny still hadn't dropped and I feared she'd get teased.

So, I asked her what she thought. She knew full well that only some children had "stick things" and I told her that those were the boys. Her face lit up as the revelation hit her and she started talking nineteen to the dozen.

One December, toddler DD started saying that she wanted to dress up as a tiger. She kept repeating this. I found a tiger costume online and stupidly paid an extra £8 for it to be delivered in time for Christmas. She never wore it and I never found out what that was all about.

"you know they add the smell to the gas"

My dd is 9 and I was quite shocked recently when she had spelled her middle name wrong. Well, it looked wrong but when I tried to teach her the correct spelling I realised I wasn't exactly sure myself and had to cross check with dh if I'd spelt it correctly. 😶

@Fizbosshoes they don't need to be refrigerated. @rosiejaune is correct.

My parents forgot to teach my younger brother how to swim.

I was taught the hard way by my grandad repeatedly chucking me into the deep end (quite similar to when he taught me how to ride a bike by pushing me down a hill) until I'd mastered it. Absolutely bonkers obviously...I was a bit upset by the whole thing and my parents went mad and stopped him taking us to the baths. Although to be fair to him, it worked like a charm!

Anyway when my brother was about 14 he came home with a permission slip for a trip to a water park. They had to sign for permission, and to confirm that he could swim 25 meters unaided. My dad asked him jokingly if he could manage it and he deadpan replied that he hadn't been in a pool since he was 2 and probably couldn't do ten.

Still went mind 😅

@Velmy I think some children now would be confused by “the baths”, and think it was a place full of communal baths.

Here’s some of my childhood logic: I loved stories, and I learned early on the idea that stories are often made up, but I had the idea that if things appeared a lot in stories, they are pretend. For example, rainbows, castles, kings and queens, prisons, budgies that talk. I was surprised to learn about these things being real.

My DD23 thought rice was a type of pasta…

Mine used a tin opener on a tin of baking powder as it didn’t occur to them to lift the lid up with a spoon, just like they’re capable of with golden syrup.

Re the phone answering and not saying anything, I do this now as I’m sick of getting random spam generated calls which start with a pause followed some electronic garbage. If you call me and not say who you are, I’m not answering.

My grandpa didn't know his full name! He'd always been known by a short version and only found out on his first day of school that he wasn't e.g. Joe but actually Joseph.

I had to talk my uni aged son through sending a letter (including where to buy a stamp and envelope). Just something he'd never done in his 18 years.

To be fair though, saying “It’s thirty five past five” isn’t wrong - it’s just unconventional. There’s no practical reason why we should have to say “twenty five to six” instead; indeed, if someone said “It’s 5.35” you wouldn’t bat an eyelid. “Thirty five past” only sounds clumsy because it’s not how you normally hear it expressed.

When I was little I thought they were baked like cakes, ie there's some sort of mixture and then a machine puts tiny blobs of it on a baking tray and they are cooked and rise and become bean shaped.

TBF that can happen to adults too. I had to ring my mum recently about the spelling of my middle name and I'm over 50!

My Siemens simple microwave shows a picture on the door, of a spoon in a glass of water with a tick✅ and another glass with water and no spoon ❎.

We live in a country where you actually don't put your hand out for the bus to stop and when we visit family in the UK we hire a car, so my 3.5 year old has absolutely no idea that waving for the bus to stop is a thing. Reading through the thread we seem to be doing okay though. I have taught her that pork sausages are made from pigs, milk comes from cows and grandma is my mama. I'm not sure she actually believes me on any of those things yet though 🤣.

My daughter (6) knows all her names but not the order they go in. At school she is often known as e.g. Anne Smith as there are 2 Annes. She also knows she has 2 middle names, eg, Ellie rose. She is however convinced the correct order is Anne smith Ellie rose and will not be told otherwise!

I didn't teach my DS that his adored DGF was my DF. When my DF tried to explain it to him when he was 6 he refused. I was his DM and he was his DGF. None of us were related we just circled around him.

I also didn't teach him that cats cannot speak. He spent ages when he was really small trying to get my DFs cat to say his name the same way I taught him to say his.

He assumed that by saying "my Grandad" everyone would know who that person was.

It's so sweet.

I suffer from Prosopagnosia, I can’t put a name to a face or see the difference from one to another.

My son can’t tell the time either, so thank you to the PP for the Numberblocks tip.
That program is excellent.

My 20yo is still quite suspicious of orzo.

It isn’t that surprising. Those children will also be bad at spatial reasoning, map reading and many areas of maths. It isn’t a new phenomenon. Digital clocks just make life easier for them.

We had the name problem with our then 3yo.
DD1 could pronounce DD2s name, and her approximation of the DD2s name became what we all called her. So when DD1 started preschool, she thought her name started with a "W" not an L...

Her preschool teacher was DD1s best friends mum who helped us correct this over the first few weeks!

Okay in fairness I do sometimes do this now (in my early thirties)! I know proper phone etiquette but I've had so many spam calls, I want to see if there's an actual person on the other end first and I try not to give out information eg my name without finding out who they are

Regards phonecalls from unknown numbers I say state your business and if it's unsolicited crap..they get a curt fuck off.