Going on holiday with adult dc - experiences?

[BellissimoGecko]

So we have just taken dc to France for two weeks. They are 18 and 21. Luxury gites, private pools. We have generally got on ok but we have had a couple of arguments - thanks ds.

Has anyone else been on holiday with similar aged dc and can confirm that arguing is normal?!

i kind of know it is. We’re out of routine, they are regressing to dc living at home, etc, but it’s a bit depressing too. Any thoughts?

Depends on the kid and situations we are in, but "arguments" (disagreements/squabbles, bad feeling) were only usual frequency (not that often) and usual intensity (not that intense) and never argued to a point that spoiled the whole holiday. I've been pretty robust in telling them up front before booking that I need them to be good company on the trip or no point in us going.

Ours are 20 and 23 and just got back from a week AI hotel with no arguments. Two weeks would be too long for us I think.
Hotel works better too - no shopping, cooking or clearing to sort out. AI hotel means everyone can get up when they like, eat when they like etc.
We had our evening meals together. Offered days out exploring etc and the kids could join if they wanted, no pressure.

Interesting viewpoints, thanks!

We had a nice villa with pool, and kids were able to do their own thing - own room, own bathroom, plenty of space outside, etc.

i think two weeks might be too long?

Also, DS says that I treat him and dd differently and this is unfair. But he can’t really give me examples of when… He Leo’s coming back to this so he must really think this, but I’ve tried talking to him about it when he’s calm but if he can’t give examples, we don’t get very far.

i say that he and dd are very different people and need parenting differently. I have pointed out that we have let him do things that dd would not have been showed to do at the same age…

Yes I’d missed the two weeks bit. I did take ds on a ten day holiday when he was 15 but it was just him and me. Usually I’m a 5 day or absolute max 1 week person. Tbh I’m a fan of long weekends…

Went away last summer with all five of my adult kids and their partners. We had a massive apartment block, where each couple (and me) had our own living quarters - kitchen, bed, bathroom, but to be honest we all ate together outside every day, and it was perfect. Everyone got on, we had a huge private pool so we swam and ate and they could do their own thing or get together as they chose. I was a bit worried before we went, but needn't have been. We did a few trips out, but there was no three-line-whip, only those who wanted to come came, but we were within walking distance of a town and some went on trips by themselves.

I don't think I shall ever go on another holiday that was as perfect as that one. Plus it was nice to have all my kids together (they are geographically scattered and don't all get together very often).

Is your son 18 or 21? At 18 I think it’s probably quite normal, they can still be very immature and moody at that age, having just finished school or college. If he’s 21 then I think he should seriously be growing up a bit. Did he genuinely want to come on the holiday?

@Vroomfondleswaistcoat that’s so lovely 🥰
We all had a giant family holiday recently as my ils turned 80.
26 of us descended to a massive house abroad and it was similar to how you described your holiday. Some days we all went for lunch/walk and other days smaller groups of people branched off and did their own thing but we always came together for the evening meal. Really nice holiday, everyone got on like a house on fire and it just warmed my heart!

He’s 18. He did want to come, but he also wanted his gf to come, and we said no (she’s coming on holiday with us in August), so he was a bit stroppy about that, though he then said it was fine.

He can have quite black and white thinking, and he can have trouble admitting that he has been wrong… until he calms down.

He’s been living in another European country with his gf for the past month, and will be heading back there next week, so we will have some time apart!!

He’s 18. He did want to come, but he also wanted his gf to come, and we said no (she’s coming on holiday with us in August), so he was a bit stroppy about that, though he then said it was fine.

He can have quite black and white thinking, and he can have trouble admitting that he has been wrong… until he calms down.

He’s been living in another European country with his gf for the past month, and will be heading back there next week, so we will have some time apart!!

He’s 18. He did want to come, but he also wanted his gf to come, and we said no (she’s coming on holiday with us in August), so he was a bit stroppy about that, though he then said it was fine.

He can have quite black and white thinking, and he can have trouble admitting that he has been wrong… until he calms down.

He’s been living in another European country with his gf for the past month, and will be heading back there next week, so we will have some time apart!!