My 14yo has been diagnosed with PCOS and she’s devastated

[CVVFan]

How can I support her? I have my own chronic conditions but not that one. I know it’s not a death sentence but the doctor did tell she needs to lose weight and that left untreated can cause cancer :(

I did read the post. Lots of things may cause increased cancer risk if not treated. Being very overweight carries many health risks including some cancers. She must know that the vast majority of people with PCOS don't develop cancer.

If it's just that she has to eat smaller portions of pasta then I don't think "devastated" is the right word. Slightly inconvenienced maybe.

Also it’s not cutting out carbs, it’s choosing the ones with a low GI

I do see that. I guess all you can do is lay out the two futures to her.

1. lose/maintain active weight. Probably can live a fully healthy life.
2. do nothing. Maybe become obese, infertile, hairy, and diabetic.

Regardless of her choice, if you/your DP do the cooking for the family, you can choose what to cook. You can't stop her snacking etc, but you can help her with meals at least.

Teenage girls don't care about being infertile but you can bet they'll care about being hairy!

PCOs is a syndrome not a disease. It encompasses a lot of problems but it is actually quite common. It does make weight loss difficult but this is mainly due to insulin resistance which can be managed by a low carb approach to diet. Not only does it help maintain weight but it also helps with some of the symptoms.
Use of GLP-1 drugs is becoming common and if you have a BMI above 27 you can access the weight loss drugs if you have PCOs. They help with the symptoms and as a bonus help maintain weight. I’m not suggesting that you give them to a 14yr old but in the future they may become available to PCOs sufferers as a preventive approach to obesity, diabetes and heart disease. I have been taking medication for blood pressure for years, not because I have uncontrolled BP but because it was the top end of normal after pregnancy and my consultant advised that rather than risk the longterm damage, controlling it before it caused damage was a sensible approach.

I have complex endocrine problems including secondary PCOs so I’m monitored regularly. I have found that I feel my best on a low carb diet which can be difficult to follow but not impossible. If I eat high carbs now I become very tired very quickly.

I've never had cancer be discussed with me before and I have PCOS.

The biggest thing thats helped me is lifting weights and exercise, and eating eggs for breakfast instead of carbohydrates. Avoiding high-sugar foods and generally just trying to have a good, balanced diet.

I grew really annoying dark neck / chin hair and have recently had that lasered off, so that might be something you might want to think about putting money towards in future if she struggles with dark hair growth.

My dd has PCOS. Saw a top London consultant who gave her advice re a healthy lifestyle (which she ignores) but at NO point was a raised cancer risk mentioned. Surely if your dd has no periods and her lining is thick she can have a Mirena coil which will solve the lining issue?

Get her to download the app AskPCOS which is a fantastic resource with easy to understand info and videos created by doctors in Australia.
Periods can be irregular in teenagers so she must have some other symptoms as well, some specialists won’t make the formal diagnosis until 8 years after periods start, but would classify as ‘at risk of PCOS’
Weight loss is the key to restarting periods.

She's 14, ffs.

P.s one of the best things I did as a teenager with PCOS was find group exercise classes to take part in - old-school aerobics, that kind of thing. Or Body Pump / Body Balance classes. I really enjoyed it. I'd walk down the local leisure centre, do the class then walk home. It made me feel amazing for perhaps the first time in my life (I grew up thinking I was overweight and rubbish at sports because I hated netball / hockey etc and in my head I thought exercise = sports). Once I found a type of exercise I enjoyed (one that involved music) then I really enjoyed myself and it became a lifestyle change that was easy to stick to. I started going to Parkrun too and that was brilliant for my self esteem and weight management. Take her down the local leisure centre and see if there are classes there she might like?

But it may impact her future hugely if she doesn't get it under control. If she doesn't understand this you (or a doctor or nurse) need to explain it in words she understands.

She got bloods and scans done that confirmed the diagnosis, but so far no, only missing periods.

shes not huge though (BMI 28) so I think she’s shocked she needs to lose 4-5kgs

She used to be bigger, and has lost weight in her own ways, so I think the message of the doctor sounded like she hasn’t been doing enough (which she seriously has).

Low gi diet.

Op, this can be a turning point for her. I had a friend diagnosed who started taking her health seriously- 20k steps a day when previously she was maxing 1-2k alone really helped to manage it and unfortunately it's such a sensitive one but it's is weight loss that really helps with this. Are you near any National Trust sites? A pass for there will give you access to some amazing walks

Bless her, hope she is ok. I have PCOS and would emphasise the weight thing. It’s so important to keep it under control albeit a little bit harder for us than most. I’m lucky enough to have two dc so it honestly doesn’t mean she will never have children. If her periods are regular and ok then that is a positive sign.

Jesus what sort of doctor doctor did you take her to? I have pcos and no one has ever, ever said anything like that to me so I can only assume there’s no strong link as I’ve never come across it in my own research.

I don’t see how she needs to change her whole life?
If she’s overweight there are benefits to losing weight other than to help with pcos symptoms. But that’s hardly changing your whole life.

I’ve never been overweight and so controlling weight isn’t a way for me to “treat” pcos symptoms, I was always a low healthy weight and yet still had hardly any periods.

She has no periods!

Well because it has been a VERY long journey of self acceptance (whilst also losing weight) to then be told it’s not good enough.

she's proud of finally being a size 12/m

so I can see how it feels like a punch to her self esteem

I’m very surprised a doctor diagnosed a 14 year old with pcos due to no periods. It’s still a completely normal age to not have started or not be regular.

@CVVFan

this may be worth a read through for you both

they've done a whole diagnostic panel (bloods and scans). And she used to have periods but they complete stopped after a couple of years of having regular periods.

Thank you that link is very helpful!

28 bmi at 14 is heavy. And it will only get worse if she doesn't get it under control.

High protein low carbs. 'Good' carbs.

If she is devastated she will do it.

As a pp said its all about food intake. People including children are overweight because they eat too much.

My sister and I had EXACTLY the same diet, and EXACTLY the same height, yet I’ve always had been bigger.

Even at my smallest (and smaller in size than her) I was substantially heavier.

I don’t have PCOS though but I was the same weight from 12 til I gave birth to her. Then gained a buck load, and lost 30kg.

I’m about the same weight as when I was 12, my clothes from back then are too big for me (because yes I kept them!)

all I’m trying to say is that weight is carried in different ways, and that she’s struggled with it for some years, and she’s finally seeing a difference, so she’s on the right track.

It's great that she's losing weight already. I just wanted to add that even a relatively small amount can make a difference. When I was diagnosed with PCOS I was BMI 24.5 and had very irregular periods. With the help of inositol I got it down to BMI 22-23 and my periods have been very regular ever since, plus the other symptoms disappeared. That was only about 12lb but made a huge difference.

So she probably doesn't need to lose loads. Hopefully she'll see improvements quickly.