Do you think having a very vivid memory is a curse?

[yelladuster]

I have a very vivid memory and remember things in detail from my early years, childhood and beyond to a point that is considered unusual. I don't think I am quite at the level of a super autobiographical memory, I don't remember what pants I had on on the 16th of January 1997 but I do remember a lot.

It can be interesting to recall this much and I think it has given me a lot of empathy for younger people and children because I remember things so clearly but it is also, perhaps mostly a sort of bad thing I think. Because the bad things never really fade away for me and I can feel like I am living though different time periods of my life all at once at times. Even when I am very much engaged in my present life and busy. Memories are never vague, sepia tinted nostalgia but very present and vivid.

I think women tend to have better memories than men for evolutionary reasons and I meet more women who relate to this than men. I think it would be nice to be able to just turn down the vividness and the remembering and only see the here and now at least most of the time.

Anyone else feel like this?

I also have a very good memory of my childhood, teens and young adult life (it gets worse from my 30s on and now in my late 40s it’s not great). I feel it is a gift - and definitely helps me to relate to young people. I have a lot of childhood trauma but my memories of this are more blurred than my very accurate memories of the mundane. I’d suggest you seek therapy for the traumatic memories - discussing them is very healing and so important to process them and move on..

@mummyofhyperDD Thank you for responding, interesting that you also feel this helps you relate to young people.

I am not sure any of my memories are especially traumatic more just the usual young people stuff failing at something, getting rejected, embarrassment and betrayal. I still find it sort of intrusive at times. I also don't feel it has faded as I got older I still remember a lot of detail of things that happened over the last two decades of my life and I am nearly 50 now!

I remember the bad things mostly! I do recall things sometimes that others ( Dh mostly ) has forgotten, but with some other things I’m really bad at recalling.
Memories are strange arnt they.

I think I am similar, OP. Memories are very strong and while I am grateful for it, it does mean I think a lot about the past and that comes with a lot of sadness as people I love are gone. I can go back every year of my life in detail, pretty much until about 3 (although I also have some vivid memories of a family visit which I was told took place when I was 2 - pleasant memories). I remember how I felt, very specific details. Not everything but as you say, makes the past very close to the present and leaves me with a bittersweet feeling a lot of the time.

@Pinktent Yes that is exactly what it is like, everything feels very current and alive which is lovely in some ways but also bittersweet. A blessing and a curse.