How do I overcome fear of public speaking?

[nervousspeaker]

I’m doing reasonably well at work and definitely well thought of but feel my fear of public speaking is holding me back. I direct project teams of c20-30 people and am happy to lead a meeting round a table with them, but put me in front of a podium or in front of the board and I get really nervous and my voice shakes and I feel like I might pass out. I also forget my words and just want the ground to open up and take me away!

I have been avoiding putting myself in situations where I’ll need to do any stand up public speaking but it’s getting harder to make excuses. I’m wondering if I should take the plunge and join toastmasters or something similar. Has anyone done this? Was it useful? Any other tips?

I find having a good start helps. So I memorise first few lines and make sure to smile and make eye contact with few people in front rows. Once you're off to a confident start, the rest will follow more easily.
Oh, and I avoid talking about things I don't know much about.

Get some coaching eg a drama teacher or a someone who teaches public speaking

https://guiltyfeminist.com/big-speeches/

I have done this, and cannot recommend it highly enough.

My sister in law swears by Toastmasters.

https://toastmasterclub.org/portal.php?marknow=0

Preparation is key.
Know your subject inside out.
Practice in front of someone, at home, if you can, more than once. Get used to your voice saying the words.

Deliver “stuff” at work as often as you can. This is the way I overcame nerves and ended up loving a presentation opportunity.

Remember the 7 Ps:
“Proper Planning and Preparation Prevents Piss Poor Performance!”

Improv is good as it gives you confidence to adapt and know you can bs it. Good luck!

Thanks @Pedallleur&@Dox9- I think coaching might help and some more practice where if I make a mess of it, it doesn’t matter!

I always feel a bit wooden but maybe smiling will help at the beginning. I worry I will look stupid as my brain goes blank if I don’t learn it all but that’s increasingly not very practical.

propranolol. Cannot recommend enough

When I first had to give an assembly, I used to practise out loud in my living room, it gets you used to the cringiness of hearing yourself and you work out any bits you stumble over. Then I would practise it in my car driving to work as well. It also helps to deliver it in the style you talk in meetings I think, rather than reading a script, people are always stronger when they are explaining something they know well/understand. Also it’s definitely something you get used to/gets less daunting over time, so keep persevering!

These are great ideas. Thanks - I can’t imagine loving a presentation opportunity! I’ve not heard of the 7 Ps so will bear in mind.

I would try toastmasters or get a couple of sessions with a coach. Will be a much quicker fix than doing it all yourself and it will make you better

I was thinking of toastmasters but i honestly feel a bit terrified of going. But I think it’s time to bite the bullet and find out more and actually go!

Listen to Viv Groskop podcast or her book. HOW TO OWN THE ROOM.

oops...sorry for caps.... It's v good.

Completely agree with practice. Practice OUT LOUD. Use presenter notes but v brief ones.

Use big images and keep text to a minimum. The presenter notes will help you.

Have some water with you.

Be honest. Tell people you're a bit nervous and new to doing it.... They'll be rooting for you.

And yes smile and look up and do some eye contact if you can.

People want you to succeed!

Before I retired, one of my jobs was to train trainers. Two bits of advice.

One is to put your attention "out there", to your audience, not inward, to how you are feeling. Keeping in mind the objective of your talk can help with this. Always have, at the front of your mind "what is it that I want these people to know/ understand by the end of my talk? ".

knowing your subject almost goes without saying. If you didn't know your subject, why are you doing the presentation?

SeCondly, ask yourself what is the worst that can happen? And guard against it. For me, it was getting my skirt tucked into my knickers. So I always ensured my skirt, if I was wearing one, was not.

Also try reframing your feelings of ‘fear’ as feelings of ‘excitement’. The fluttery feelings, jitters, adrenaline - you’re just SO EXCITED to get out there.

Im you. I feel your pain - its awful. Im 50 and I just avoid as much as possible as I feel Im too old to put myself through it When I absolutely have to I find the following helps -

1. Propanlol or rescue remedy. Eases nerves hugely.
2. I can do impromptu and am really gobby in meetings, but put me up to a 'planned' presentation I go to pieces - so I try and make it feel spontaneous. I make jokes, and only have bullet points, so I can go off on one.
3. If i feel I am getting shaky and nervous and blotchy I ask people questions. It takes the focus off me whilst I regroup.

These get me through, and believe me I have MASSIVE issues with anxiety with public speaking, and everyone I tell is so so shocked, because I am very opionated and loud in meetings usually. I just can't do planned stuff.
I literally getting anxious thinking about it! lol

I'm an industry mentor, focussing on public speaking. I absolutley agree with @Mumteedum. Also -Fake it til you make it. Pretend to be someone else! And take every opportunity you can to talk to a room.

Propranolol.

Seconded - helps so much. My voice shakes too and when I hear myself sounding nervous I get more nervous, but 10mg of this & I sound steady as a rock even if a bit nervous inside.

I do loads of public speaking and love it, I don't get at all nervous

My mindset is always

• they are here to hear what I have to say because they think I know what I'm talking about

• I do actually know what I'm talking about

• I've sat through loads of shit and boring speakers in my life

• Worst case scenario I can't be any worse than them

• I don't remember any of them particularly or care if they were a bit rubbish, we were all just there to get it over and done with.

• At the very worst I'm going to bore someone shitless whilst we both get paid for the pleasure.

• People mostly don't care and aren't listening anyway. If they are then you have the opportunity to sell/teach them whatever you are selling/teaching. Win

@Iudncuewbccgrcb

"At the very worst I'm going to bore someone shitless whilst we both get paid for the pleasure"

🤭 Love this. As my lecturing job gets ever more stressful and they're less keen on me as I'm getting older, I will think this thought 😂

Just keep doing it. Over and over again.

The more you do it the easier it gets.

Talk how you wish someone would talk if you had to listen.