If you’re an anxious soul…what helps?

[ByGreyTiger]

Have been a worrier all my life. I think I always will be but sometimes the anxiety is overwhelming. Have been on sertraline before which helped but ideally I’d like to make some lifestyle changes before going on it again.
what have you found helpful?
ideas I’ve had… quit alcohol but i’m not a heavy drinker (few glasses a week) and I really enjoy having a glass of wine with friends on the rare occasions I get to go out! (Two dc).
caffeine? Probably drink too much Diet Coke. Two coffees as well a day.
exercise? Have been doing lots of running but sometimes I wonder if that actually stresses me out more - is that even possible??
phone use - don’t use much social media. Instagram a bit but I don’t think overly. However I do find current affairs very depressing particularly when I get Instagram suggested posts about wars/atrocities/children suffering etc. but feel switching off the news would make me
a bad citizen!
am trying to read more but so many books that are popular seem to be absolute shite!
any ideas? Am early 40s, fed up with this awful clawing anxiety.

I feel for you, I’ve been the same my whole life. The only thing that has helped me is Sertraline, it doesn’t take the anxiety away completely but it numbs it enough for me to get a grip on it.
I find routine helps too and a set sleep pattern. If I were you, id stop watching the news too and turn those notifications off.

Sertraline

A hobby that absorbs your brain and your thoughts can be diverted on to once the worrying starts. Mine is gardening and the next thing I'm planning in the garden.

An ADHD diagnosis - allll fell into place. Main ‘symptom’ was anxiety.

It sounds weird, but also letting the thoughts go where they will sometimes and then accepting that I have no control over it.

I have no control over the thoughts and actions of others. I have no right to feel like I have a reponsibility to control the situation around the thoughts and actions of others. I keep trying to remind myself of this!

In my 40s, HRT also helped massively, as did reducing sugar (sad, but true!)

I also learned to be as kind and as forgiving to myself as I am to others. A work in progress, but it is making a difference.

I consider myself a worrier but never needed medication. My coping strategies: I just block out the ‘bad’ news. Read the headlines and don’t click on anything that could upset me.
Breathing practice when I feel overwhelmed.
I take magnesium regularly and aswagandha at more stressful times.
I don’t drink alcohol really apart from occasionally, I’d cut down on that. Recommendation is also not to have more than 300g of caffeine per day, maybe calculate what you’re having and cut out the fizzy things.
Apparently running raises cortisol levels too much if you’re in peri/menopause. Depending on how much running you do, maybe you can dub out some with strength training/yoga.

weight training 4x a week and swimming the other three. If I exercise every day, not running but weights, it really helps burn whatever chemical makes me brain panic.

low sugar diet, never skip a meal and never binge

screen time limited to 2.5 hours in 24 including emails and texts etc.

getting out into nature

-no alcohol
-no caffeine after lunch
-reduce sugar
-no endless scrolling on phone or double screening
-getting outside in nature
-gentle and meditative excise like yoga and walking
-daily meditation
-prioritising sleep - phone free bedroom, regular bedtime, getting enough sleep, black out blinds, no eating/drinking before bed.
-daily journalling

I'd love to say I'm doing all the things above but in a bit of a spiral at the moment and struggling with sugar, phone use and exercise/meditation.

Switch OFF the news. If something important happens in the world, you will find out about it one way or another. I always mute the news on the radio. Bad news sells, so news outlets will always promote the “misery”, with anything else as a mere afterthought.

It can help to write worries down, especially if they are keeping you awake. By doing this, your brain can let go of them.

Keep focusing on what you CAN control. If you have to travel, for example, you can’t control whether public transport will be reliable, but you can control being organised, checking routes, leaving early etc.

my dog
walking outside
listen to the birds
vaping, but not recommended

agree, switch off the news
immerse yourself into a good book

Another vote for medication (Citalopram). It’s changed my life.

Meditation daily. I recommend The Calm app is you're a beginner.

Spending time outside.

Pets.

If I can't sleep, audiobooks.

Avoiding parties, busy places, unnecessary drama at work.

For me, stopping driving but that is a specific one and wouldn't apply to everyone.

Firm boundaries and learning to say no.

• recognising it is healthy, so well done for proactively managing this
• whatever exercise helps you switch off/relax/happy. For me it's swimming but that would be hell for some
• yoga/pilates
• gardening
• if you feel you have to follow the news (totally get that), why not have a break from it at the weekend/a few days a week?
• same with social media. If you check it less often, much easier to sift through the rubbish. Not great that you get targeted advertising about wars etc, that sounds grim. A friend got loads of judgy parenting tip articles on her Instagram so she doesn't use it at all anymore. Maybe click on loads of cat/dog/cute/funny posts to change your algorithm to something more positive?

Excercise - a body balance class has been great for me. Running can be hit or miss for me I find.
Being cautious of too many sugar hits and keeping my food intake sensible as sugar highs can make me anxious
less time on my phone and probably this site too if I’m honest
Applying logic to my worries and always having a plan B even if that will never be needed

Also really crucially being careful around other anxious people - other people’s anxiety really feeds into mine to the extent I won’t talk to certain people about some subjects as I know they’ll feed my anxiety and not reduce it

Sorry to hear you’re feeling like this OP.
I’m 42 and have a history of anxiety, I’ve previously taken Sertraline which definitely helped but am coping without for now (it’s been around 10 years since I last took it).
I still get very anxious at times and suspect perimenopause is around the corner. I also wonder if I may have SAD as my anxiety is much worse October to Christmas. I found out recently that SAD can manifest as anxiety as well as depression, so I try to take extra care of myself during the winter months.
Things that I find helpful:
Cutting way down on alcohol. I only drink a few times a year now and try to limit the amount when I do.
Ditto caffeine. I have one proper coffee or tea in the morning and then switch to decaf or herbal teas for the rest of the day. This has also improved my sleep.
I also try to avoid sugar and wheat where possible as blood sugar highs and lows make me feel terrible.
Workout wise, I do yoga, swimming and body pump as well as cycling to work.
I try to get out into natural light as much as possible especially in the winter.
I went part time at work following mat leave 5 years ago and that has improved my mental health massively. I’ve got no intention in going back to full time! I use my days off to work out, see friends/family and just potter around, I treat those days as proper time to recharge.

Hope you’re feeling better soon.

And agree with others that avoiding the news will probably be helpful.

I’m a worried and always will be. It’s just part of who I am. Some things have helped me be calmer though - I don’t drink, I have decaf coffee, I get plenty of exercise (manual job and high energy dogs) and I absorb myself into good books.

Exercise! Weight lifting specifically... I've found when I'm putting my all into something physically hard, my brain switches off from all the things I'm anxious about. Your brain can't think about both at the same time. I find myself driving home from the gym with a sigh of relief when I realise my brain has had a break from all my anxious thoughts for an hour.

I am lurking

At your age Hrt was a game changer for me.

This. Mine is adult colouring

Lifelong anxiety sufferer, now age 61.
For me, the routine is very similar to what you and others have mentioned already:

No alcohol
Reduced caffeine
Less junk food, try to focus on fresh fruit & veg
Avoiding news, no doom scrolling
Daily walk for 1 hour or more.

For me personally;
I read fantasy because it's pure escapism, it takes me away from real world issues.
I knit lace. It's a good distraction for my anxiety and it has a rhythm and repetition that I find soothing.
I paint watercolour because it allows me to express myself and watching the colours dance on the paper is very calming.
I also have picture books that give me comfort when I have a night time panic attack. For me those are Jackie Morris books.

I'm having a course of CAT on the NHS and finding it excellent. I didn't get along with CBT at all but the CAT is totally different. I can't get to appointments, but I was able to choose video or phone sessions. It's definitely worth looking into.

Good luck. I hope you can find some things that will help you.

Thank you everyone, these are really helpful. It’s interesting how many of you have said to fully quit alcohol, and also that running actually can raise cortisol, which kind of makes sense. Thank you so much.

I never watch the news and I use CBD for anxiety and sleep