What does he want??

[tryinghi778]

I’m so confused and I’m wondering if anyone has any thoughts.

10 years ago I dated a guy let’s call him M for about a year and a half. What started as a great relationship towards the end was actually really awful and I was too blinded to see. Examples he was outright nasty about my appearance, didn’t contact me for days and just stood me up a fair few times. Looking back now I don’t know why I put up with it but hindsight is a wonderful thing! Anyway he ended it I was upset at the time but I quickly moved on and I met someone who is the polar opposite my now husband and we are happily married with children. from what I understand 10 years ago he also married.

M has randomly send me an email about something we were discussing 10 years ago (I ignored this) he then tried to add me on a social media platform again I ignored. Today he has tried to add me on a different platform.

i have nothing to say to him and he’s not someone I know anymore or in my life who I can hand on heart say I have thought about these last 10 years.

i just don’t understand what he wants??!

I shall keep blocking and hoping it’s the end of that but I’m just baffled should I respond and tell him to go away??

Tell him he looks awful

Whatever he wants, it won’t be anything good (for you). Just ignore. He’s ancient history.

@JaneJeffer😂😂😂😂

@Purplecatshopaholic 100% he is it’s just a bit irritating to be honest- like why hasn’t he got the hint when I didn’t reply the first two times??

He's probably looking for narcissistic supply..I will probably get grief for saying this but I'd put my money on that.

@Gastons5dozenEggssorry what do u mean? Xx genuinely x

@Gastons5dozenEggsjust looked up narcissistic supply and yes u may be right but he won’t be getting it from me 😂😅 I just want it to stop.

Things haven’t worked out as well for him as they have for you. I reckon he’s single, bored and his mind is wandering back to ‘old times’. Maybe he feels guilty for how he treated you but sod that, block him and don’t engage. Nothing good can come out of speaking to him. What time of day does he try and make contact? They usually come out of the woodwork late at night!

I would find it so hard to follow my own advice as I’m super curious, but I would suggest ignoring it.

Mainly because if you don’t, that will be good for him and not you. Nothing will beat total indifference to his attempts to contact you. Nothing you say or do will be more powerful then ignoring him.

Ignore is the answer then, really truly that's what you need to do.

@Newgolddream70so the latest add was 6am this morning can’t remember the others and yeah your probably right.

@Gastons5dozenEggsand I have now 3 times and I’m hoping that’s it but if it continues I don’t know what to do as I don’t want to engage at the same time I don’t know if he’s seeing it as some sort of game -

let’s hope he finally has got the hint and I don’t hear from him again. Thank you ladies 🩷

Sounds like he is bored, he will get a kick by getting a response from someone who has moved on (you) don’t give him that thrill. Ignorance is bliss, don’t respond, if you do, you then give him the opportunity to ignore you. Right now the ball is in your court, keep it that way.

@WildPosterhes not getting a response so can continue to be bored 😑 strange strange man.

It’s unsettling when this happens but definitely just ignore and block. Have you still got the same phone number as you had back then?

No I don’t so he doesn’t have my number (thank god) but I do have the same social media, email and quite a unique maiden name so easily searchable I suppose although my accounts are private - you have to be my friend to see posts etc he was never on the social media platform he tried to add me on. And he made a new account for the other one as he was blocked previously when we broke up. I’m assuming he did as he was blocked 🚫

He'll move onto someone else pretty swiftly (no offense) it's just how these people operate so I don't think you need to worry too much unless of course it becomes a stalking situation but I would suggest you would have experienced that already long before so, yeah just hold out and he will move on quick enough

@Gastons5dozenEggsno offence at all!! I hope that to be frank because it’s irritating let’s hope

@Gastons5dozenEggsi don’t think it would be a stalking situation and luckily I live far away from him now assuming he didn’t move so would never run into him. I will just keep blocking - thank you xx

A posterity bonk probably. Just ignore him. He'll get the message soon.

I’d get my husband to reply
“ Hey bud 👋, she’s mine now, & you can fuck right off “ followed by loads of laughing faces !!

@Missyk25😂😂😂😂

He wants a kick out of thinking that he still has some sort of hold over you just to boost his ego.

Block, ignore, repeat. He has nothing interesting to say.

My guess is his marriage has fallen apart, he now regrets dumping you and he's trying to rekindle the relationship. You're the one who's happily married so you've had the last laugh at the end of the day👌 I wouldn't give him any more headspace, OP.