Being "taken" out for dinner, would you expect a present too?

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BF of 6 months has made quite a thing about "taking" me out tonight for my birthday. We usually go halves, or work on a you paid last time, I'll get this, basis. Not keeping formal count but it all works out.

For his birthday I bought him something to do and got the same for me so we could go together, something he'd previously suggested it would be nice to do, but we'd only been together a few weeks then. So, I'm not sure if I've set a precendent!

I'm genuinely not bothered about presents, I'm terrible at buying them (see gift above) because I really don't care for myself and find it hard to see why others might care. I'd rather not have a gift than have someone spend time and money on something I don't like and need to keep/use so as not to offend.

So I don't really mind if he hasn't, in some ways it will be a relief if that's the deal and neither of us needs to bother going forward, but if he has got something, I've no idea what it could be and wondering if I'm going to need my "that's lovely" face!

If it were a regular restaurant you go to, I’d expect a gift. If it was a posher, more expensive restaurant, maybe not. Expect maybe a bunch of flowers.

However, what are your views on presents.? I love choosing, buying and receiving presents. Dh has always been a ‘what do you want?’ Type of person. I’ve given up now and just say flowers because at least he has to go and choose and buy them (and buy myself something surreptitiously).

So if you’re a present type of person, maybe worth mentioning this. Maybe not now, but in a few months time away from your birthday, in a general conversation.

Yeah I’d mark his card too. I wouldn’t react but a certain lack of generosity would be noted. And I’d also assume he’s not that in to me if he just paid for dinner and didn’t get a little gift and card on top.

Because being taken out for dinner isn’t that much of a treat…

I would be disappointed, but wouldn’t say anything. It would highlight to me that our standards/expectations are different. Not an issue in the early stages of a relationship, but I would wonder what other differences there would be.

I get a bit worried about people who over-gift - I see them as a bit performative and I get a bit worried about people who overdo birthday expectations - I see them as a bit spoilt and needy. It's no coincidence that dh and I don't do gifts as a rule and only give each other random odd things. We have enough spare cash to buy whatever we want ourselves.

He's a man so his present to you will be an offer of his cock! Whether you need to maintain your "that's nice dear" face really depends upon how impressive it is and whether he presents your gift in the restaurant or back home!

Yes, a gift on your GF's birthday is totally normal, as well as taking her out for dinner. It doesn't have to be a big or expensive gift but a thoughtful one would be particularly good.

I would totally think being brought out to dinner was the gift once it wasn't KFC!

I think expecting anything else is greedy.

Yes

I think if you just paid for you both to do something together for his birthday and didn’t get him a gift as well, it’s perfectly reasonable for him to do the same, ie the dinner.

No I wouldn't expect anything I never do and if I do get something then wether I wanted it or not it's the love of the giver I very much appreciate. It's lovely he is taking you for a meal enjoy ☺️

6 months in I would've been taken out and had a present as well. Honeymoon phase and all that. Once we lived together and finances combined I would've been taken out with a smaller gift, like flowers. Nowadays I tell him if I want to be taken out or have a gift.

Did you get that desperately wanted prezzie OP?!

Yes but me and partner make a big thing out of birthdays.
Always an activity and a meal out, often a night away (all funded by non-birthday person) plus presents.

We both love spoiling each other and see it as time to connect.

I’d be hoping for a gift too but it taking you out is his gift then I wouldn’t say anything and next year would be prepared in advance to say what I’d like

I’d expect a present. I think cards are pointless when you get to actually see the person.