Im a single parent 2 kids. Marriage breakdown in 2023 led to me moving to an expensive city as my DF encouraged me to do a masters then I got into a prestigious university - i was very clear if we moved I’d be pretty reliant on him as I’d have very little income but he’s a high earner and had lived bill mortgage free with me while married so he very much said no let’s move there I can support you etc etc.
fast forward to now and im about to qualify as a teacher with a job lined up in September. However my relationship with DF has rapidly broken down he has mental health issues and been off his meds for a while now he’s had financial stress since my divorce fees last year plus some reduced income but never really added up or made sense and when I’ve said this he always says I’ll explain and then he doesn’t. Last two weeks he’s been getting extremely angry screaming swearing and blowing up at me and the kids but mainly me over money. All kinds of accusations but basically he’s retiring now and saying he’s going to be destitute and in poverty because of me and the debt he’s in after the legal fees but I was trapped in that situation again largely because of him (long story)
he’s screamed at me again today even after I told him to leave me alone, started off fine saying he’s getting a double wage and then a large drawdown to pay his debts but then he said I need to stop taking the kids out at the weekend spending money I said yes I take them out as I always have to country parks etc rarely anything expensive nothing beyond the norm but after working all week in my training (full time in a school) yes I take them out! He got so aggressive and screaming I was scared and said he’s being abusive and he made all
these accusations at me
long story short. Relationship entirely broken down he doesn’t want to live with me we don’t want to live with him. I’m desperate to move back to home town where it’s cheaper but we just extended the rent contract for a year as my eldest DS is about to do his GCSEs in Y11 next year. I have my job starting September as well.
my DF has screamed at me as he left to go out saying i need to find another job somewhere cheaper and live on my own. I’m about to finish my training after next week but would this be possible? Would it be disastrous to last minute move my eldest DS who’s finishing Y10? Would I be able to get out the rent contract? (DF primary renter as done on his income not mine) would I be able to cancel my lined up teaching job and find another one before September?!! I have saving of about 20k which is all I have left from my marriage after divorce selling the house which I’ve ringfenced to try and buy a house back in my hometown.
Help me think clearly what can I do?