I have an unusual problem with food

[ThePigandPear]

And would love to get some advice that the Dr hasn't been able to offer.

I don't have any disordered thoughts or body image issues regarding food.
But ever since I was young (I am 51 now), I don't feel good if I eat much of a plate. I love so many foods, and particularly vegetables, but if I load more than two on a plate, in any amount, I feel uncomfortable for a good while after eating.

I don't eat fast food and have a decent diet, well balanced, because I make sure of it. I am a healthy weight (8st 4) and am active and happy enough, but mealtimes are a pain in the arse. This is getting old and I just wish I could eat how I want to.

So my preferred way of eating would be : small breakfast with either oats or toast and peanut butter. Fruit for lunch or something equally small (if I am honest I would skip lunch altogether, but don't because I need the calories).
For dinner I would like around 4 wholewheat crackers with olives, a bit of cheese, pickles, nuts and some scattered berries.
Or a bit of sushi rice with two veg and tuna, etc.

So I feel like a small rodent, and deliberately eat more to keep healthy.
When I have let myself eat how I want to, I have lost too much weight.

What I would love to know is, is there a way to enjoy my preferred meal sizes but pack in enough nutrition? To get all that I need per day?
I employ peanut butter, eggs, cheese and decent proteins to keep on top of it, but i struggle with a pile of veg. Tonight we had roast chicken with 4 veg and felt like shit. I do this because I know it is healthy.

I don't like the idea of protein / food shakes at all as I need some crunch and mouthfeel. I think this is just who I always was, and I have spent my life forcing stuff down me that I don't really want just to keep on top.

Any tips or advice welcome.

Yes, I love the idea of tapas! that kind of thing.
Small bits and variety.

I think the traditional meal plate is my problem , I hate hot meals with piles of veg and meat.

I need to work out how to pack in nutrients in a slightly different way.

I’ve been making soups recently by roasting a load of veg eg tomatoes, garlic, red onion, sweet potato and then popping it all in a blender and I enjoy with a slice of sourdough toast and butter. I also eat hard boiled eggs and babybel cheese for added protein as snacks.

Do you exercise? That might increase your appetite.

How about a new recipe book?
drvegan and Jessica Shand on instagram have some lovely recipes on there. You can crumble feta cheese, walnuts, other nuts and seeds on top of salads for added nutrition.

Do you like cake? You seem very focused on healthy eating but it seems to make you unhealthily thin. Would you eat some cake or would you be horrified because it's 'unhealthy'. Cake has eggs, butter, flour and sugar so protein, fat and calories. It tastes nice and is calorie dense. My instinct is that you wouldn't be able to eat it because you would view it as bad for you. This is disordered eating. I don't know if it's an official term but the word orthorexia describes people who restrict their diet to only 'healthy' food. If you are happy to eat cake then I suggest you eat that, drink milkshakes and smoothies and eat chocolate.

Do you like pasta? Maybe a chunky veg pasta sauce? I put courgette, pepper and onions in it (cos my kids hate veg and only eat it in hidden form!)

Curry? Butternut squash and some other veg if you want them
Soup?
Salad?
Veggie chilli?

i hate the meat and veg meals as well, always have, the smell knocks me sick. I know everyone loves a big roast dinner but it just reminds me of farts

I think this is a very good idea. I'd concentrate less on the feeling full though and more on things like:

"I have spent my life forcing stuff down me that I don't really want just to keep on top."

"I want to eat at least 12 a day and often buy it in."

"It is like my mind and body are not coherent."

"Getting older, I am very aware of osteoporosis and arthritis as it runs in my family so I am pretty concerned."

"I just don't want my nutrients to come from vits."

"I think I got concerned as a pharmacist recently told me that not having over 5 per day would compromise me"

"I would be open to a smoothie or drink, but it feels odd to me, possibly because i have never done that before."

All of this strongly suggests a problematic relationship with food.

I do like pasta, but prefer it cold , so will try to evolve that a bit. Could make little pots with veg and ham/chicken.

I think what I have leaned from this thread is that I don't like traditional plates with hot meals. Like the half veg, protein and carb.

I would love to know how to incorporate veg in smaller bits.

For a PP who asked - I don't try to eat perfectly healthy I do like cake and other treats, but I don't have a lot of appetite generally, even though i am not stressed.

My GP knows all of this. I am not sure what she can say since I eat a healthy diet and am a healthy weight.

I just want ideas for smaller meals with good stuff.

Could you have a lack of appetite because you don’t actually enjoy what you’re eating?

I think you should see a qualified dietician.

Do you eat out? Maybe try tapas or mezze - both offer a variety of smaller plates of food served separately which might be more to your taste.

Why do you feel the need to pack the nutrients in?

Why describe a normal meal as piles of meat and veg? Why do you hate that, when your planning on making small pots of meat and veg?

I agree I think you need to see a disordered eating specialist and unpick these feelings

You could be right.

I think my preferred stuff would leave me at a calorie deficit, and that's the concern. I love food but in small doses.

It's one of those where you have to recognise it's a problem yourself. The same as people who have a problematic relationship with alcohol, for example.

In all likelihood your GP will be of little use unfortunately because as you say, you don't present as unhealthy. If I were you I'd speak to a therapist about it. They might be able to implement change for you. I hope you give it a try because it's a real shame to have been battling this for so very long.

is it that odd to ask for ideas for nutritious small meals?

What about eating what you fancy with a few treat things on top of it?

Say you like crackers, use some that are abit higher in calorie, full fat cheese and a cake or bit of chocolate for afters.

If you make things you actually enjoy, you might be inclined to eat abit more maybe?

No, but all the rest of the stuff you've said indicates an unhealthy relationship with food and nutrition.

this is all your mind babe. Just chill. Stop attaching value judgements to food and enjoy eating becuse it’s nice. And healthy. And fun.

Ok gonna go chill babe, thanx

Have you told your GP that more than the very specific two of any veg 'loaded' on your plate causes you to feel 'bad' for a good while after the meal, regardless of the amount of food - that the number is the crux?

Have you told your GP what feeling 'bad' looks like to you?

You know that your approach to eating isn't usual or common. That's why you've used terms like 'unusual' and 'strange' in your posts.

Your GP would refer you to a therapist if you said you thought you had a problem, or you could just go privately to see one and bypass the GP altogether.

Spread some pesto on it first. More calories, not a lot of volume
I often have sourdough toasted with pesto, full fat cottage cheese and sun dried tomatoes
or I’ll make a bowl with say pulled pork, picked onions, some guacamole, coleslaw, corn on the cob
nuts are high calorie so have those with some cheese

If you’ve got Instagram this page is worth a look

@Sasssquatch bit flippant.

@ThePigandPear

does this resonate?

Try taking digestive enzymes before you eat. You can get them off Amazon. They’ve been a game changer for me, especially with bloating and feeling too full even though I haven’t eaten enough.

Full fat dairy, nuts and seeds, olive oil based salad dressing - there are lots of ways to increase calories and nutrients without a lot more volume of food.

I know you said you don't want to take vitamins, but can I ask why? It seems like a logical thing to do if you are struggling to consume what you need otherwise. Even if short term while you figure out what works for you.

So you do any weight training? That would be really good if you are concerned about bone health.