Son is ill during GCSEs

[Caerulea]

He threw up yesterday morning but was able to go in & do his exam, then I picked him up after. Next is exam is tomorrow & this morning he got up & had diarrhea & stomach hurts. Mild headache but no other obvs signs but for stomach acid pain.

So I've kept him off today but what do I do tomorrow? I'm not wholly sure if this is illness or stress & he's not able to make those links himself to tell me. He displays ZERO stress about the exams (he's autistic, it's bloody obvious to anyone else but the school refused to test him cos he's so capable)

I can see there are ways for the boards to compensate etc but am concerned his grades won't be representative. He's on for 8's & 9's - if he's unable to make it in what are the chances he'll get truly representative grades? He's a total outlier in the school itself, it's a really badly performing school (though wellbeing & safety is high)

As far as he's concerned he's going in tomorrow.

What bad luck! Does he have a fever?

Imodium for diarrhoea, Buscopan for cramps, Valoid for nausea (sorry I don't know the British equivalents). Paracetamol for fever. Rehydrate electrolytes or make your own with 1 litre boiled and cooled water, 1 teaspoon salt, 8 tablespoons sugar.

But a doctor may be necessary as it could be a viral or bacterial bug, in which case a stomach medication with antibiotics may be necessary.

Update -

He's much chirpier, has eaten a bit. Heard nothing from school unfortunately, but he's had no more distressing toilet trips.

Maybe he just needed a day to decompress? Fingers crossed tomorrow morning is uneventful.

I genuinely don't think he's poorly, there's no temperature & he doesn't seem ill in any way at all.

I've absolutely no desire to test the kindness & tolerance of the exam boards, not in the slightest! I hate how rigid the exam system is anyway & I don't want him to fall foul of it.

That's how it was for eldest some 19yrs ago but things have definitely changed since then. Where we are at least. Though even then it was nearly two bloody years!

@Caerulea - great news that your DS is feeling better. I would be sending him in tomorrow, if he sleeps well and wants to go. Hopefully he will have “some” breakfast.
Sorry to hear about your school not being responsive. We have been really lucky with our grammars, I think they just understand these types of kids. It is not fair! Hang in there.
Hopefully he can sleep after the exam, if he needs to.

Check NHS website for up to date advice on diarrhoea: maybe if you show him this he will eat a bit, since not eating at all is now known to exacerbate symptoms. Good luck to him in the exams, he’s lucky to have such an involved parent.

Re ASD at 16 you can go to the Dr's and get referred through the adult pathway.

Ironically I think things were easier in some ways 19 years ago. The net for diagnosis has widened so much, so many kids have a diagnosis now that I feel it no longer holds the power to access support like it used to. For e.g, things like getting a blue badge for an autistic child that runs into roads etc- a lot of people get turned down for it and have to appeal, that didn't used to happen. I really think they need to urgently add levels to an autism diagnosis as the system as it stands has diluted it's meaning. I'm saying this only in the hope that it gives you some kind of comfort that having the diagnosis wouldn't have necessarily made the school anymore understanding. They should be going off needs anyway, not a diagnosis, so don't feel bad about him not having one. Hopefully post 16 will be more understanding of his needs.

Parents can put childlocks on the car doors to prevent them getting out and then hold their hand. I don't think disabled dpits should be taken up by those without mobility problems

It isn't as simple as that for some children with ASD with no sense of danger who are easily spooked.

I totally agree with you! For this son it doesn't affect his school life in the the slightest, in fact it helps him. He doesn't need any concession in that environment at all. It would benefit him as an individual but it's not going to affect his life in the way it did eldest at school (went into secondary as a gold-star gifted child & was expelled before his GCSEs for low level disruption whilst the school had watched his grades plummet & ignoring my begging to read his file. It was agony & nearly, literally, killed him).

The way things are atm just isn't working & I'm not afraid to say that there are parents using adhd & autism as excuses for ordinary poor behaviour in school. I wouldn't want to be a teacher & those I know are struggling with it.

I didn't know that! Thank you

Morning update -

He went off with no issues & even convinced him to have a breakfast milkshake before he left (they were the ONLY thing he'd have in the morning but he's now moved against them. No idea what we try next)

He's going to let me know if he wants picking up after the exam. I'm already sat outside DS2's college in another town waiting for him to finish his English retake (poor bugger is excellent at English but falls apart under exam conditions), so I'll drive back with him, grab DS3 on the way home, drop them home then go to work via the butchers 😂

It's a lot sometimes

School are absolutely shrugging their shoulders and GP telling you has to go through school! Lazy toads!

Hope your kid was ok. If it happens again then ask for an individual room near the toilet so he can run if he needs to.

While doing all the home medication you could ring the school. With S and D it's usually a case of no attendance for 48 hours. If he has a bug it could be passed to others so please check first. They may advise a separate room or aggregated grade (which are close to/same as predicted one).

Best of luck and hope he feels better soon. Xxx

My son had similar during his A levels last year. Also probably stress related. I informed the college beforehand, who said they would make the invigilator aware. Also, he took an Imodium before he went in, just in case. He made it through the exam without any issues.

Sorry, just realised I’m too late. I hope he was ok.