Would you let your almost 14 year old lie in bed ..

[sillyfrilly]

If you were going to work? My son has a day off school tomorrow. I am working. I’ve no issue with him being at home but unsure if it is the done thing to leave him in bed sleep alone?

I would. Nothing better than a lie in!

I used to leave dd1 when she was around that age. She is and always has been incredibly sensible and had a phone to contact me if she needed to. I always told her the night before that I would leave before she woke up so she knew she was home alone.

Why would you wake him? Genuine question, I'm just a bit baffled as to why you wouldn't let him just sleep. Does he not get lie ins at weekend?

If you're leaving at a reasonable time (after 8am maybe) I'd put my head round the door, say goodbye and ask if they needed anything before I left, but wouldn't expect them get up. If I was out early, I'd explain the night before that they wouldn't see me in the morning, and maybe call at around 10 to check on them.

Yeah, I did that yesterday. Why or how could/would I make her get up? She’d just go back to bed the minute I left anyway! But I called her at 11am and she was up and getting dressed; no big deal. It’s what I would do with a day off!

im not worried at all about leaving him alone, he’s very sensible and I trust him. My own anxiety is the problem I suppose, incase something happened and he slept through it - I’m being dramatic I know lol I just wanted to put some feelers out to see what the vibe was

Ask him in advance. If it was my DD she'd want to know that I was leaving rather than waking up and finding me gone. My DS wouldn't care though.

Yes. Teenagers sleep, and need to sleep, at weird times. Circadian rhythms shifts and all that.

What??

why does he need to get up because you are going to work?

just tell him today you'll be leaving at x o'clock.so he knows you won't be there when he wakes up.

I’d be led by the child. My daughter of a similar age asks me to wake her up before I leave the house, she then goes back to sleep

Of course I would , part of being a teenager to lie in bed until lunch, just because you can.

Definitely! Can't see the point of waking him.

If it’s safety you’re concerned about I’d say he’s safer asleep than up 🤷‍♀️

I would try to remind him the night before I’d be going to work or leave a note/text saying I’m off to work and when I’d be back. Possibly suggest something he can get himself for lunch.

What do you think might happen? And how do you think him being awake would help?

This is definitely your anxiety talking & really isn't 'normal'.

He's 14, you need to get help for your anxiety or the teen years are going to be hell fur you.

if it makes you feel better tomorrow get him to message you when he gets up.

I always told DD when I would be gone in the morning but I never woke her.

I have to leave at 7.15am, why should I wake her on the rare occassion of a mid-week lie in?

This, mine would want to know.

We have the dog for emergency management

Why on earth would you not leave him?

Good grief, whyever not?

Mumsnet gets weirder everyday!

This is an odd question. I just can’t work it out. Surely it’s a no brainer

Lucky him! Just chat about what's happening so you are all prepared for tomorrow and know what to expect.
I'd leave a note in the morning too as that's a nice thing to do.

What’s the specific issue with him being in bed?
Why does it make any difference what he does?

Yes why wouldn't you. Let him lie in

I think he is safer in bed sleeping than up and doing whatever 14yo boys do…!

14 year old boys need their sleep. Mine slept significantly from 14-18. We always joke when they eventually woke up they were all over 6ft.