Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Flip

Original poster

M What Age Would You Leave Your Teenagers Alone Overnight?

21 replies

RabbitsRock · 31/05/2025 12:44

This is following on from another thread. Mainly thinking of older teens ( DD is 16,17 in December). She tells me that lots of parents will leave their teenagers home alone for a weekend these days & that things are very different from when I was growing up. DD16 is quite young for her age emotionally & has MH problems. She’s on the spectrum & we’re pretty sure has ADHD as well. She’s really struggling with her eating. I don’t think we could realistically leave her even for one night. What’s the situation in your family?

OP posts:

mumonthehill · 31/05/2025 13:00

We left ds at 16 for a night away and by 17 we would go away for a weekend. However he is very sensible and was happy to cook etc and look after himself. I think you have to de guided by your dd and perhaps give a night a go.

Original poster

RabbitsRock · 31/05/2025 15:01

Anyone else?

OP posts:

campingmama · 31/05/2025 15:07

Is completely dependant on the child.. my DSC’s 16&17 will be home alone for a week when their mum goes on honeymoon over the summer but we are only around the corner, I’d happily leave the older one home alone and know she’ll look after herself and be sensible… the younger one not a chance.. they’ll probably forget to shower and live on crisps and pizza unless their sister sorts it all for them!!

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Families

QueenofLouisiana · 31/05/2025 15:24

We did from 16. A night here and there, a couple of hours away. Mainly as he didn’t want to come with us. From 17 we did slightly longer, a couple of nights, some further away. By 18, he was either about to go to uni or already there.

GardenersDelight · 31/05/2025 15:48

Two DDs left at 15.5 and almost 17 for couple of nights
Went abroad when 16 and 18
As PP said not long before they would be living independently at uni, at least when at home there were plenty of neighbours who would report back!!

HelenDenver · 31/05/2025 16:16

15.5 for a night, but within an hour if we needed to get home.

Badgerstmary · 31/05/2025 16:45

Left ds overnight at 16 whilst we were 3hrs away.

ARichtGoodDram · 31/05/2025 16:45

Totally depends on the teen. DD1 was babysitting for other people overnight at 14. DD2 I'm still nervous if she's alone overnight at 25 as she's so easily distracted.

JockyWilsonsaid · 31/05/2025 16:48

DD was nearly 16 - I had to have an operation and there was noone she could stay with for the night. She was fine, but I would have expected her to be, she's a very sensible type.

ChiccieD · 31/05/2025 16:50

It all depends on the child. My eldest has autism and at 16 we wouldn't have been able to leave her. She was 19 before we left her alone (with her younger sister) overnight. And even then, we only felt comfortable doing it because our youngest (who was 16 at the time) was very sensible and mature. And we had my parents on standby in case they were needed.

reluctantbrit · 31/05/2025 16:57

DD (ASD and ADHD) was 17 we left her alone for a 2 night stay in the UK, 3 hours by train.
She correctly told us that she would be in uni in September so she needed the opportunity to do things independently.

We got a couple of texts like asking for a specific programm for the washing machine and the Disney+ password for example. She did some shopping as well.

We will leave her again next month for 4 nights, going to see family in Germany but she is finished then with A-Levels and can just hang out, no need to worry that something would stress her out too much.

We have my best friend and our neighbours on alert if there is anything majorly unexpected.
And we know that she is very mature for practical things so wouldn't leave doors open overnight or forget keys. She regularly makes herself food already.

socks1107 · 31/05/2025 16:59

18, but that was delayed because of Covid otherwise would’ve been 16 and it was for our younger dd.
they loved it and still do when go away 😂

parrotonmyshoulder · 31/05/2025 17:01

I have left mine at 16 and 12 (together) but knew they would be sensible, had emergency numbers of local friends, wanted to do it (there were other options available) and would just do their normal routine. Completely depends on the individuals.

Ivytheterrible2025 · 31/05/2025 17:03

It would definitely depend on the individual teen, and the circumstances - does she have younger siblings to be responsible for?

If it's just your DD, then it should be okay as long as she has support in place if she needs it or a relative/ friend to check in on her.

trashpandaa · 31/05/2025 17:12

DD was almost 16 the first time we left her overnight.
She was 17 when we went to NYC for 5 nights. She’s very sensible and trustworthy though so had no concerns leaving her.
My sister lives 5 mins away so she was on call in case of emergency!

MadridMadridMadrid · 31/05/2025 18:25

We left DD home alone aged 16 when we dropped DS at university and that involved an overnight stay for us. DD had the option of coming too, but chose to stay home.

PersephoneParlormaid · 31/05/2025 18:27

It absolutely depends upon the individual.

ChaliceinWonderland · 27/06/2025 00:02

Mine are 14 and 15. I'll start next year... I go for evenings out but am back by 11pm

Mikart · 27/06/2025 00:44

Left dd at 16 for a week to go on holiday. She loved it.

bettydavieseyes · 27/06/2025 01:42

16 for my eldest but she was ready. It's an individual thing. My autistic younger girls are unlikely to have the same milestones. My 10yo may never be independent

Ilovechocolatelimesandsherbertlemons · 05/10/2025 15:35

It's not that long since 16 year olds could get married and legally start a family. Surely they should be able to be left for the night. You have to make the judgement if you think your DD is not able to cope, but then you have bigger problems to sort out. How are you preparing her for adult life?

Flip