Would you contact a friend after this long

[Jesswebster01]

I'm on my period at the minute only lasts around 4 days quite light but I get sad, moody and sometimes anxious and lately keep thinking about old stuff I'm back to normal when I'm off. This month I was thinking about a friend I fell out with a few years ago around 5 or 6 years. Our kids were friends we had a stupid fall out over something to do with the kids nothing major but I am stubborn and never spoke to her after. Just thinking about sending a message but thinking it may be akward would you even bother after this long?

I'd give it a few days when you're feeling less emotional and then decide. There's nothing to lose from contacting her and then at least you're not wondering what if. But if you don't hear anything back or you get a negative response leave it.

If you think this is just your hormones then leave her alone. If you actually want to put the effort into rekindling this friendship and can accept that she might just be done after so long of you being stubborn then go for it.

We have kids the same age and I think it would of been nice for them to be friends. She was a good friend it was stupid how we fell out and lately I just think I am missing out on a good mum friend who I am comfortable round. The only thing I think would bother me is if she didn't reply I'd feel a bit embarrassed for myself

I wouldn't. During COVID there were all these inspirational stories about rekindling old friendships - I didn't find it worked. People say "you have nothing to lose" but if you look at it clearly there are 4 possibilities: she doesn't respond; she doesn't respond positively; she responds, you get together and there's awkwardness; or she responds and you re-kindle the friendship. That's only 1/4 chances of a good outcome. If it goes badly, you will have added to the unhappiness.
I would leave well alone.

If I were her I wouldn't bother replying after 5/6 years, if it were weeks or even months then maybe, but that's a long time to be stubborn over an insignificant fall out.

I would also be suspicious of your motives after that long too.

Knowing the type of person she is I think she would be kind about it but it's just a bit bizare isn't it after so long. I know if it was the other way round I'd be glad to get the message. But just unsure

I don't think you can use your kids being friends as a reason - after this amount of time they will choose their own friends and friendships. They aren't toddlers any more.

I wouldnt want a friend who fell out with me 6 years ago to contact me, because she was on her period and feeling sad about it. SIX YEARS LATER. You've only thought about it in the last month.

I think you need to seriously think about your own actions and how you can change things in the future to maintain relationships despite your hormonal fluctuations!

I think once you have a big fall out or small in this case but a big gap, it rarely goes back to how it was. That said, it’s always nice if you can at least clear things up, I am sure you’ll still be friends just doubt it will be the same as before

I think if there’s a chance of reconciliation there’s no harm in reaching out, if you’re accepting of the fact she maybe ignore you or respond angrily. If you’re prepared for any outcome and you feel it’s worth it, I think forgiveness and reconciliation are good things under the right circumstances.

If you miss her, reach out. I’ve recently been reminded how fragile life is and wish I’d had the courage to reach out to an old friend.

From what you say, you cut her off after a minor incident. In all honesty, I would not want to rekindle a friendship with someone who treated me like that. Why would I? You’d only do it again sometime.

If you got in touch, I probably would find it satisfying to be the one who got to ignore you this time.

If after a few days, you feel like you miss her, then yep, if it were me, I’d contact her.

When I was 17, my best friend and I fell out over something really stupid. We didn’t speak again till we were 21 and I think she reached out to me first. I’m so glad we did because we met up and it was just like old times. 20+ years later and we are still best mates, probably more like sisters. We’ve seen each other through divorce, miscarriage, death of parents. Don’t give up on the good friends.

I sometimes get these moments then remember why we aren't friends anymore.
It depends on a few factors mainly if it's a friendship worth trying to rekindle also if you can deal with it if she doesnt want to.

I'd definitely wait for hormones to calm down then if you still do why not. Least you can't regret not trying.

If I feel the same tomorrow I will send the message and let you know how I get on either il get blanked or it will go well 🤣

Or she's changed her number 😂
Please update us, I hope it goes well

I know she's got the same number. Wish me luck 😳🙏

Do it OP and good luck

In your message you have to apologise - for whatever the incident was, and for being a stubborn bugger. Be genuine, and own it… no excuses, no minimising.

I think she may be happy you’ve reached out.
Sleep
on it and if you still want to get in touch do it.

Good luck!! I really hope it works out

Spoke and it went well we have made plans with the kids for an outing very glad I did it I'd encourage anyone thinking about it to do it I'm very happy I did. Thanks for all the advice

This is a great update. I hope it all works out.