Is this “food noise”?

[seriousconsideration]

Posting here for traffic.

At the grand old age of 40, I’m beginning to see just how messed up my relationship with food is, but I just don’t know how messed up it is!

I really wish I just viewed food as fuel, but I have such a complicated problem with it.

I called in to the supermarket last night to (quickly) pick up something for dinner, but instead I ended up going round in circles and with such decision fatigue. In a nutshell, this was basically my thought process;

1. what did I want to eat?
2. what did I think I should eat?
3. what would DH think I should eat?
4. should I just get the cheapest? (I have a bit of anxiety about spending)
5. If I get X then I would need to buy Y to go with it, or why bother?
6. it needs to be healthy!
7. calories!

I’m exhausted by it. I feel if there’s a decision to be made, I’ll make the wrong one.

If I’m going to eat something, then I want it prepared the way I like it or why bother? I’ll often make a bad choice just for ease.

My weight is creeping up and my old ways to drop weight aren’t working any more.

I keep hearing about “food noise”. Is this what it is?

Any advice on how to make a start on a healthier relationship with food? Thanks. I’m at an absolute loss.

I thought food noise was constantly thinking about eating and enjoying food, and generally going through with it.

I really want some crisps, ooh, a G&T would go really nicely with them. Shall we get takeaway tonight, yes, lets. DSis is coming over on Sunday, we'll have big roast, trifle, cheeseboard etc. Let's go out for dinner tomorrow, picking up snacks when you pay for petrol etc etc. Constant enthusiasm about food and anticipation of the next eating opportunity.

That just sounds more like decision fatigue as you said.

Food noise is always thinking about eating, when your next food is, worrying if your planned dinner will be enough or if you’ll still be hungry, intrusive thoughts about food and eating even if you aren’t physically hungry. It’s when it dominates your internal monologue and informs a lot of your (generally poor) decisions around food:

I would say good noise is more - oh I am hungry what shall I eat now whilst grabbing something in the kitchen

what you need however is a meal plan. Going shopping to grab dinner is a bad idea - too much stimulation and choices and time pressure

so whilst watching tv on a Sunday make a list of each days meals. You grab what you need for the next meal on the list. Make it specific - 100g good mince , cabbage cauli or Brocilli whichever is cheaper…

I'm more concerned about number 3. Does your husband make comments about what you should/shouldn't eat?

Food noise to me is constantly fantasising about food and what you can eat next, and loving the feeling of craving for something then having it.
I find food shopping quite easy as I always have a few things I'm desperate to eat!

No that's not what I understand by the term 'food noise'. I have food noise meaning I think about food constantly. I constantly want to eat even when I'm not hungry. I wouldn't have those thoughts when I went shopping that you did. So my dh doesn't have food noise, he eats, feels full, stops and doesn't think about food until he is experiencing physical hunger again.... whereas I eat, feel full, still want to eat and will be thinking about it always

That's not to say your own situation shouldn't be addressed obviously or that it's not problematic in some way. But I don't think the definition of food noise is what you are experiencing.

100g?! I use 600 for four people … are we greedy?

I think its generally considered to be when food consumes a large proportion of your thoughts- from what to eat for your next meal even whilst you're already eating, being consumed by food you want to eat like chocolate in the cupboard and thinking about it until you have some, negative thoughts ie that was a bad food so I should now be good and restrict, planning things around food ie I've achieved this what food shall I have as a reward, perception too- what will people think if I eat this? Basically just where food related chatter is constant and it leads to making poor decisions and also to binge/restrict cycles etc.

For me, food noise is when something specific starts calling to me from the kitchen. There's currently a beautiful loaf of bread sitting in there and it will be all I can think about. I can't take my mind off it. I have to have some. It's not hunger, its craving.

That’s a lot of mince.

Since starting WLI my personal definition of food noise is ooh shall we get a take away tonight, maybe a bottle of wine, it’s the weekend let’s go out for breakfast, grab a coffee and a pastry while we’re out, do we have any chocolate in the cupboards, some nibble bits would be nice - the list goes on. I think it will vary from person to person but since starting the injections that has all stopped for me.

80 to 120g per person would be reasonable portion size for meat - I don’t tend to eat much myself but know others do

I use 500g of mince for four, I think that’s pretty standard? Would be fine with 400 but then you’re left with awkward 100g. I can get more servings out of that amount of mince depending on how much other stuff I want to use. But I try to eat more of the meat and less of the pasta these days so meatier the better (although I can’t eat red meat just now which is very sad)

I eat 250g in a sitting but I only eat meat and dairy.

For me, food noise was like obsessive thoughts about food.

Literally planning what I’ll have for dinner as I’m eating breakfast.
Eating a biscuit but barely tasting it because there’s another in the pantry and I’m thinking about eating that one.
Planning everything around food- night out based on what restaurant, poring over their menu, wondering what my husband will have so I can order something different but have a taste of his.

“Food noise” is basically a social media-friendly term for “food addiction”.

'Food noise' is when you're thinking about food all the time, regardless of whether you're hungry. So no, I don't think what you're experiencing is 'food noise'. You were food shopping, so obviously you're going to be going through a normal thought process about what you're going to it.

It's possible that you might have a fairly disordered way of thinking about food, but without knowing more about you, it's hard to tell. Most of what you've said could indicated disordered thinking in some situations but would be perfectly normal in others. For example, considering calories would be normal for someone who is obese and trying to follow a weight loss diet. It would be less normal for someone who is a size 6.

I'd be interested to know:

• Do you flap like this about all decisions, or only food? If you stress and overthink in general (for example you mention anxiety over spending) then this obviously isn't a food issue but a general mental health thing or personality type.
• Are you overweight? Do you actually need to reduce your calorie intake? Or do you obsess over calories for no reason? How would you feel if you gained a few pounds?
• How different, really, are what you want to eat and what you think you should eat? Because quite often, what I might want to eat would be (eg) whole Black Forest gateau, but what I should eat is a normal meal, and I don't think it's disordered of me to think 'Actually, yeah, maybe that gateau isn't the best choice for a midweek dinner, I should probably have an actual meal, I'll make a curry'. But if you're thinking 'Hmm, I really fancy spag bol' and then thinking 'Oh, but spaghetti might be too many carbs and I've heard red meat gives you cancer and do tomatoes have a high sugar content, maybe I should just have some lettuce and a vitamin supplement' obviously that's very different and clearly a problem.
• What's the issue with your DH? Does he criticise what you eat? Or do you just feel weird about eating in front of him? FYI, he shouldn't be critiquing your diet.
• When you talk about 'healthy' food and calories, what do you actually mean? Are you fretting about specific ingredients or getting anxious if you eat things you perceive as 'bad'? Are you obsessive about weight gain/loss?

Not exactly food noise but yes very unhealthy thought processes around food to the point you can’t separate your own food wants and wisdom from what has been imposed on you by other people/ society. Cool that you have recognised it! It’s the first step to getting rid of it! I can remember my road to Damascus moment when I realised the sheer volume of thoughts I’d had about one scone 😆

⬆️⬆️ This is food noise.

It’s waking up and immediately thinking if you’re going to have a ‘good food day’ or a ‘bad food day’ and then swivelling between the two all day long.

What will I eat for lunch? Tuna salad or wait, how about a trip to Greggs? It’s only 10am, why am I thinking about lunch? Oh, is that a biscuit? I really want a biscuit. But I shouldn’t have one because that’ll ruin the day of good eating and now tonight I won’t want to eat fish and vegetables. Maybe I won’t have veg and salad anyway and instead I’ll have a takeaway? Should it be Indian or maybe Thai? Wait, no, I need to be good today. I still want that biscuit though. Maybe one will be ok? Man, I’m so fat.

And so on! Obviously a lot of this is almost subconscious but when food is a preoccupation, it’s there. When I took WLI, it just stopped. I only think about food now when I’m actually physically hungry.