Suicide survivors chat

[Arina22]

I lost a close family member to suicide 7 years ago.

i feel like it has completely floored me and affected me in so many ways. I dont know why im still thinking about it so much 7 years later.

It was very traumatic at the time in that he waa missing for two weeks and they eventually found him in a remote area.

I still cry about it. I did go to therapy afterwards but i didnt find the therapist did me much good.

I was wondering - people who went through it, any recommendations on what you did to heal.

Maybe we could have a support chat here.

I lost my 25 year old son 7 months ago. I've had 6 counselling sessions but to be honest I've done lots of reading and research and think that's helped me more. I have a couple of good friends who have been great.
I refuse to be known as the mother with the dead son and attract pitying head tilts. I'm proactive, got lots planned and prioritise self care. I'm not brave as some say....I'm just getting on with my life.

Aw i send you love .
And a hug

What did you read about? X

Different stages of grief...reasons why people do it, moving forward. I'm not a person who takes comfort in religion, angels, robins or feathers...I believe when you are dead that is it. I wanted no sympathy cards or flowers...and luckily my friends took my lead.

I lost my brother to probable suicide 18 months ago. He clearly articulated suicidal intent to several people and then died from an overdose of an illegal drug. It’s a very complicated grief and tbh has blown our family completely apart.

Hi, I lost my DH 9yrs almost to suicide. I had loads of amazing therapy and although it took years to feel ‘normal’ again, I felt really okay about it all on the anniversary this year. I’d really recommend exploring therapy again. Ideally private.

Have you come across Gabor Maté? He’s done lots of podcasts etc you can find on YouTube. He explains how if you had emotional trauma in childhood you’ll be more likely to struggle with traumatic things later in life. (He’s definitely talked about this fairly recently in his podcast with Mel Robbins). Soldiers who go to war are more affected with PTSD etc if they had difficult childhoods, unsupportive or unattuned parents etc.

Tbh although the factors causing suicide can be numerous and complicated, I think suicide more often happens in an environment of emotional neglect (however well meaning). So it could be likely you’re living in that same web of people who don’t attune to you on an emotional level or help you process feelings properly.

Btw it’s not a blame game - it can be really challenging to become conscious of emotional neglect and see the part we all play in it in a measured and compassionate way, which makes the grief all the more difficult to process. I was terrified for a while that I hadn’t listened out for signs or cries for help (my DH’s death was a complete shock) and that I had blood on my hands, but that’s not the case at all.