where do i go from here

[MyAquaGuide]

i have a 6 month old DD. Partner and i have been together 5 years. During covid he lost his job and since has been doing odd jobs which has been covering his monthly outgoings.

I live in his family property along with his Mum and Dad. Its a 6 bed and we have more than enough space. Its mortgage free and I do not contribute to bills but buy groceries, cook when i can etc.

when i met partner i thought he was financially literate. he has investment properties with a sibling. however i later found out hes in debt and has no savings. DD was unplanned and im on mat allowance. im paying for everything for her and starting to resent partner as im doing everything while he hardly changes nappies becase hes working all day.

i wnt the best for DD and dont want to live with MIL and FIL anymore. the arrangement was meeant to be temporary but now im thinking its best to be a single mum. what do i do

........... he lost his job and since has been doing odd jobs

............ starting to resent partner as I'm doing everything while he hardly changes nappies becase he's working all day

Which is it? He's either doing a few odd jobs, or working all day. It can't be both.

Are YOU financially literate? Most people could see living with the inlaws and an accidental pregnancy to a man working odd jobs was unlikely to result in riches galore.
What did you do for a job before you started freeloading off his parents?

I am a receptionist. I want to look after DD full time but because of partners finances I feel stuck

I know it wouldn’t make me rich but I adored partner in the beginning but now it isn’t enough

he does odd jobs and is out all day because he’s taking all the work he can find right now

Out of curiosity, why hasn't he found a new job in the 5 years since covid?

I think you should go along with the situation for the sake of your baby: any substantial change while sje is so little could stress both of you far more than remaining where you are.

However, it's clear that this situation doesn't suit you on the long term. So mu advice would be to start preparing everything you need to live how you know it's best for your daughter. If that implies having your own place, your own job, speaking to your partner about boundaries and expectations (or deciding you are not meant together)... Use this temporary setup to work towards your goal. I wouldn't rush things, as I said, for the sake of your baby (you say this situation allows you to be with your daughter, which is a priority for you). And work on the resentment: it's counterproductive for you.

Covid was 5 years ago, it's sad that he lost his job but I don't believe he couldn't have gotten another full time job in that time. If you were also working full time before pregnancy then you could have put your wages together and found somewhere to rent/buy. Even two wages on minimum wage would have given you 3k + a month coming in.

Why would it be best to be a single mum? You have nowhere to live so I assume you mean receiving benefits and a council house?

I'd talk to your partner, he needs a full time reliable job with set hours. You can go back to work after maternity and you can both be earning a full time wage whilst saving to move out.

Hmmm, I would have loved to stay at home with my children but due to having things like a mortgage to pay I had to go back to full time work before they were 6 months old. You both sound like you need a rocket up your backsides to be honest.

Do you have savings? Can you afford to move out? Where is your partner's money going? Babys aren't that expensive, and if yous are paying anything towards the house I'd expect you both to have saved a good amount. We moved home to parents for a year before buying and we managed to save a lot of money. You need to speak to partner about moving out together