Dreamt I killed someone

[lamonad]

Had a horrible dream last night. The city was under attack by terrorists and in the distance there was an explosion and I randomly killed this child. I won’t go into detail about how or the graphics of it but it turned my stomach. In my dream, at the time of doing this I didn’t know who it was. But later I realised it was my eldest son and was balling my eyes out and felt so guilty in my dream.
but then later on my son was in my dream and I was relieved that it actually wasn’t him and he was still alive.

It was so disturbing and I feel so bad in real life. Obviously I know it’s not real. But has anyone else had a similar dream? I’m confused as to what this means

for context about life right now, we have a younger DS 8 weeks old and I guess I’ve been feeling guilty and feeling the majority of my time is spent with DS2 as I’m breastfeeding and he won’t settle with DH. My husband is spending a lot of time with DS1 and yesterday we all went to the park and for the first time I was able to hand DS2 to DH and I played for a good 30 mins with DS1 which I could tell he loved. I have been feeling really guilty recently about not spending as much time with DS1 so was really nice to do this finally

but who did I kill in my dream and does anyone have any idea what this signifies?

Your dream means nothing. Have you been watching the news recently or read threads/social media regarding the current wars. It might be that if you have? But I understand how frightening bad nightmares can be. I’ve had horrible dreams where I’ve been murdered, raped, killed someone, one dream I was in a volcanic explosion and died 😂 but there a few where I’ve woke up crying and couldn’t stop thinking about them. But you need to put them out your mind, thinking about it won’t give you clarity.

Sorry but both these made me laugh out loud. But it’s probably more common than people think but we just don’t talk about it. I had a dream I got it on with my brother 🤢

I’ve had loads of dreams that I’ve killed someone although I don’t remember doing it and that where I’ve buried the body is about to be dug up for building work. The people often represent a part of myself that I don’t want other people to see or people I think I’ve let down. Your relationship with your son as you knew it is no more (in a sense dead by your choice to have another child) and guilt can be attached to that

I'm a teacher and I occasionally have nightmares about work...

One is that I have to teach an English lesson about poetry (I have this dream surprisingly often!). I'm a science teacher IRL. In the dream I'm hopeless, I'm trying to identify similes or metaphors or whatever and the students know I haven't a clue.

The other dream I have is that I'm sorting out my dirty laundry in my classroom just before a lesson is about to start. The kids file in and I'm rushing around picking pants off the floor and trying to hide them.

Separately though op, I just wanted to say we went through the exact same thing when dc2 was born. Dc1 got a bit closer to dh because they played so much while I was glued to the baby. I felt desperately guilty but looking back it was a good thing because they're a lot closer now. He does about 90% of her bedtimes now.

I also have dreams where I know I have done something awful though don’t dream the act of doing it just the guilt that I have killed someone / been unfaithful.

I think this type of dream (and the intrusive thoughts I had from time to time about all the awful things which could happen to DDs when they were small) is all part of the anxiety and guilt of being a parent. Particularly a brand new one with hormones all over the place. Try not to worry, but if you are worried about how you feel, talk to your GP.

When you’re sleep is going disturbed and you’re getting woken by an external factor (I.e a baby) you’re much more likely to remember dreams and they feel so much more vivid, because you’ve been woken at the wrong point in a sleep cycle. I also have a young baby and I’ve woken up in the middle of mad dreams in the last few months.