Do you remember your childhood birthdays?

[Brunts12]

Do you remember your birthdays when you were a child? If so, were they good memories or not so much? I’ve never really thought about it until I had my own children, and it made me realise how utterly shite my birthdays were. Some years, especially from around age 12, I didn’t get a present or any acknowledgment at all, just your normal typical day. For context, I am an ‘80s child and my parents weren't poor at all, dad was a senior engineer and mum was a uni lecturer. I just think my mum wasn't a particularly emotionally available parent, while my dad simply couldn’t care less. Weirdly, it's only now, thinking about it, that it makes me quite sad.

My Mum always made me a home baked cake and made jellies. I was allowed to have a few friends around for tea and we had balloons. Some years I remember we played pass the parcel and musical statues. As I got older I was allowed to take 2 friends to the cinema or a little cafe in our town for a meal. For our 18th birthday my sister's and I could either choose a big birthday present or have a big party. I have 3 older sisters and they all chose a big birthday present like a used car. I chose a big party. I remember my Dad asking if I was sure. I was. I had a fantastic party, with a big cake, a disco and I was allowed 90 guests. About 17 were family and the rest were my friends. I really loved it. Fast forward 40 years one of my sisters looked up the other day and said she didn't know why I got a big party and she didn't. I reminded her she chose an old car instead of a party. She said she'd long forgotten the old car but still remembered my birthday party. 🎉🎉🎉

I remember the birthdays of my childhood. Lots of presents from family in the morning, breakfast in bed, and then a party with the extended family (grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins). Presents, flowers, music, great food, cake. My birthday is in the summer, so usually the party was on the actual birthday, sometimes on the weekend after.
Then I had a party for my school friends after school started.

OP, I hope you have great birthdays now as an adult, and great times celebrating the birthdays of your husband and children.

That sounds lovely.
My MIL is one of ten and grew up on a farm in poverty, as her dad was an alcoholic. She still has really fond memories of her birthdays, though. She says that even though they hardly had anything, their mum always made each of the kids feel special on their birthday. One year, she got my MIL a wooden hair comb. MIL still talks about it so lovingly, it melts my heart!

2 occasions
First one I received a space hopper for my 8th. I wanted the first go but my older brother was trying to get it off me. We were squabbling. So dad got a knife and punctured it.
Second was we had a joint party in the October near his birthday. (Mine is in may)
The cake was car shaped.

Thankfully I have a great relationship with my brother. Didn't with my dad.

I was born in the 1950s, we had a small, dark, Victorian terraced house with an outside toilet and just a cold tap in the scullery. There were no birthday parties but as a summer-born we used to have a day out at Hayling Island. A couple of times we went to a theatre to see a musical, I’d have been 10 or 11.

I remember desperately hoping for blue trousers, but unwrapping a pink dress and being in trouble for failing to hide my disappointment. Usually got a book. I got a Kodak Brownie camera for my 10th birthday, and still have it! A portable radio when I was 12, to listen to the very new Radio 1 as they refused to have it playing downstairs. Usually an item of clothing though, a jacket, or boots, or something for my room, like a bedspread.

Oh how sad OP. I had 2 of mine in the 80s and always made a lot of birthdays and still do to this day.
Make a fuss of yourself OP, and heal your inner child.

Mine were rubbish. I make a big fuss of dc and put a lot of effort into making their birthday's great.

Mine were a disappointment, although my parents did make some effort and I would have a "party" (2 friends coming for a play date - this was a treat as I was never allowed play dates the rest of the year). The gifts were always not quite right (cheaper low quality version or designed for younger kids) but I knew I had to pretend to be pleased. They couldn't afford much and it wasn't as easy to find specific toys as it is now with Vinted etc (I get most of my dcs gifts from there and don't spend much). I remember some birthdays up to age 11 or so... I think I had got so disappointed with them by then that I gave up getting excited over them.

My dcs have whole class parties with a hired venue, but it's expensive (I figure it's a finite cost as they stop doing big parties after a certain age).

I cannot remember any of mine. Knowing my parents they were probably great. But I have no memory of them!

Birthdays weren't a big celebration growing up, but there were always cards and a few presents on the day. There was always a special high tea, with cake and singing Happy Birthday. Presents were mainly needed clothes or shoes, maybe a pen, plus usually a longed for book. About 8 or 9 I remember choosing an anorak from a stall one evening after school for my birthday present and feeling so grown up & just happy it was new. There was never much money and we'd never go out for a meal as a family. Where we lived was a couple of rooms in a shared house, so we never had 'proper' parties, but family would come over. As I got older presents were mainly money or vouchers but I still treasure cards that I was sent by family from across the world. As an adult birthdays are still low key but tend to focus on doing something memorable such as seeing a show, going away for a long weekend or spa visits. Although last year my OH and I had a big party in the summer for all friends & family as we both had big birthdays to celebrate.

I can remember exactly one birthday from my childhood.
I might have been around 10 and my mother went all out on that one. I had a few kids come around, it was a theme party but I don't remember anything other than that.
Moving along to age 16, my mother said she would redo my bedroom for me in any theme I would like, which was an amazing gift in itself, as growing up, I was seldom allowed choices.
I chose Spanish.
Black, wrought iron patterned wallpaper with an unfortunately enclosing vibe to it, new bright red bedspread with matching cushion and Spanish artists prints on the wall.
I got new bedroom furniture also which I took with me when I married and we had it for many years after.
I remember feeling very grown up and pleased with the revamp.
I have no idea why I got that one birthday party, I really doubt I would have asked for it.
My mother was creative and I think now that she grabbed the opportunity of a challenge to see what she could do to make it the best she could and that was that; been there, done that, job done.
I too have always gone all out for my DCs.

Not really, or others. All I remember is memorable cakes. It makes me think that kids birthdays now are so OTT and unnecessary

Some, but my birthday fell during long school holidays so it was very quiet and not many people around. I always had presents and a cake though, nothing to complain about, yet at the same time, not memorable enough for me to recall most of them.

I can remember from my 7th (first one after my sister was born) clearly and what i did, before
that i have some flashes - games, balloons, cakes, guests but they merge and i don’t know what birthday was which.

always acknowleged and always had card and some small gifts to open. We weren’t that well off

Yes I do. My mother always made me a homemade cake and she always had a party for me. I do the same for my kids because I have such happy memories. You don’t need to spend lots of money on birthdays you do need to make a big fuss because they are important.

Your story reminds me of this ad for Barnardos

https://creative.salon/articles/work/barnardos-change-their-story-bbh-dublin

I only have vague memories of my parties (you wouldn’t do it now but I remember a party game of throwing darts at water balloons hanging from a clothesline) but I remember the cakes that mum made. Every year party or not she made me a cake 💜 and as an adult still made my favourite cake right up until she got sick.

I remember most of them, not all. Only had 3 parties, our parents took us out for dinner or made our favorite, my mother always made the cake, and brought us breakfast in bed with our presents in the morning.

When I think of the cost of parties then- five or six friends, in our house, a cake, some buns, small boxes of smarties and skittles, two giant bowls of crisps and we’d have cocktail sausages and chips. We’d play pass the parcel (prize would be fancy paper or markers) and musical chairs or hide and seek or chasing and everyone had a fab time.

As a child my mum seemed to organise party events - sometimes a small soft play, sometimes just family. Some years were more party-ish than others. I always got a nice gift and a cake. However, for my 18th I just wanted to have some friends round with a takeaway. My dad was so nasty to me the night before and was fighting and arguing all night. I felt sick the whole day of my 'party' and by the time it came round I didn't really enjoy it. He always ruined any big event for me. Not sure at all why he couldn't just let me have a nice thing - I was hardly asking for much really.
Now I always have big balloons, home made cupcakes and treats, parties etc for my DC. I want them to really feel how special and loved and deserving they are.

I don’t really remember them but my mum has photographs of me with my cousins/friends all sat around the table at my party. Back then nobody had a party anywhere other than in their own home. I think we played party games such as pass the parcel. Mum always baked me a cake and made all her own party food. I usually wore a long dress too as was the fashion then.
I vaguely remember mum making jelly in a special jelly mould in the shape of a rabbit. Lord knows how she managed to keep it intact. Plus we ate ice cream too.

I’m so sorry to all of you who have horrible memories.

I can remember a few birthdays growing up. Think I only had one party. We were considered poor but my mum did the best she could. We always had a card, gift and cake. She had to contend with my alcoholic, abusive father, who would sooner drink any money they did have away. I honestly don’t know how she did it but she managed to give us some happy memories.

I remember a flash of one in a local church hall where i cried because i didn't win any party games - I must have been 7 or younger. Another from maybe 12 where i went to an animal rescue sleepover type thing. I cant remember any others at all!

Weirdly I saw a picture of something online recently - I think it was a vase or something decorative - it had a checked pattern. And i could suddenly taste fondant. It took me a while but it was the same pattern as the bedding on a 3 bears birthday cake I had as a small child.

Mine were similar. I had friends whose parents made a fuss- but in hindsight they weren’t OTT, just cake, maybe a balloon and birthday meal. Mine was always a non event. I remember one birthday as a teen my mum was working away and I got up in the morning and my dad told me ‘there’s some stuff in a bag in the kitchen’ and that was it. No happy birthday, no being with my while I opened presents.

I always put banners out, buy balloons, have good cakes etc for my kids.

Nope. But that’s because I never had one.