To think we should be more accommodating?

[BrickCrab]

Im just wondering if anyone else feels the same. Had PCOS for many years & my tummy is very very big. It’s a result of the fat additions from the condition and the fact I always always have ovarian cysts. Right now my tummy is rock hard and looks im about to give birth aaah another amazing flare up (NOT) & it got me thinking- instead of fat shaming people who have no control of this weight gain, shouldn’t we be more accepting and mindful that people may have a huge swollen stomach for several reasons and view everyone as equal while minding our business and not thinking they’re either fat or pregnant? There’s a lot more reasons for a very big hard round tummy other than pregnancy- for example endometriosis, ovarian cysts, fibroids and medical conditions etc. for example im having a huge flare up right now and no doubt look fit to pop and I’ve been mistaken as pregnant by a man who asked me outright and was looking at my “bump”.
and just to clarify- I know cysts and other things are completely different to pregnancy and im not mocking pregnancy at all (my PCOS also makes it very hard if not impossible to become pregnant in my case)
a doctor that examined my tummy put on my medical form “obese & tummy was hard to examine”
my tummy is so bloated and distended right now as well as fat so that doesn’t help
just wondering what other people think xx

But there are people who want people to notice when they are pregnant, no i was not eant of them for which i mean either way but more and more it seems people will be offended by anything they have decided is wrong

No no i do not randomly ask people when they are due if somome asked me I would explain i am not and move on

I would rather people speak to me and get it wrong then be to scared to talk because they haven't read a list of the 'rules' on what they can and can't say

I wouldn't call it 'fat shamed' just misread a situation

I'm sorry to hear this, OP. Have you had scans and tests to rule out ovarian cancer, or any surgery to remove cysts or enometriosis tissue?

I think you are massively overthinking it. I don’t think the majority of people give a toss about what the cause of someone’s weight is. The reason for that is that people don’t give a toss how fat you are in the first place. I went to the supermarket yesterday and saw fat/thin/bald/ tall/short. You see them, like you see anyone and carry on.

If by ‘we should all be more accepting’, you mean that we shouldn’t have internal dialogue or thoughts like ‘that person obviously should lay off the ginsters’, well that’s never going to happen, but then you would never know those thoughts people are having in the first place.

But mostly, people don’t care, because you weight/stomach size, is of zero consequence to them.

Edited to add that the above isn’t supposed to be pissy, rather reassuring, and a reinforcement that people think more about their size and the reasons for it, then other people do.

Recent research shows that PCOS only slows your metabolism about 100 calories per day. That’s like, 7 almond’s worth. If you’re getting fat deposits, it’s because you’re eating over your caloric expenditure on a regular basis. You could try eating less and moving more, and if that genuinely doesn’t get rid of them, you should get assessed for lipedema (That’s when your fat cells become tumors, though it tends to happen more in the lower body. There’s treatment and management for it.)

As for the bloating… I have trouble with that too. I find that it’s really important to figure out which foods exacerbate gas production, to drink lots of water so as to mitigate constipation, and to avoid excessively salty foods that can cause water retention. (Getting a gut health test from Viome really helped me figure out my trigger foods.)

Gas Ex, belly massages (like you’d do for a gassy baby) and the happy baby yoga pose help a lot with gas relief when it’s built up.

Im sorry that people have been insensitive to you about this.

@MyUmberSeal this was weirdly comforting LOL x

I have hypothyroidism and am on steroids so weight is an issue and iv been asked when I'm due a couple of times before. I don't think anyone should be commenting on others appearance ever. I also think people should be a bit more mindful of different reasons why some people are over weight and it's not just as simple as she must eat loads. I eat significantly less now then iv ever done yet I weigh more.

@feelingbleh absolutely- someone did comment on here saying pcos only affects 100 calories or something which seemed well meaning but the condition itself causes weight gain particularly round the belly as it’s male hormones & they act in the same way such as hair growth (beard), beer belly attributes etc
it feels like you’re constantly penalised for stuff that’s 50% not in your control x

Its also not just about gaining the weight it also makes it harder to lose weight compared to a person without conditions like pcos