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Waiting on text replies, what is the matter with me?!

7 replies

Batteredtoe · 28/04/2025 11:37

Newish man is lovely. Makes it very clear he wants to see me, arranges the next date at the end of the previous one, turns up on time, never cancels, calls when he says he will. There is none of the usual will he won't he dating anxiety.

Even so, I still find myself anxious when waiting for a response. We don't text much because we see each other often so there no need in between, messages will be things like do you fancy xyz to eat tonight. He always replies, the only time he reads a message and doesn't reply straightaway will be because he plans to call instead, which he does within an hour. Sometimes it takes a while to read a message, which is probably because he hasn't looked at his phone, but I still find myself thinking he's probably read it from the notification and not replied. But even if that's true, I'm not worried, I know that he'll reply (or call) when he can, I just hate the waiting.

It's not that I'm anxious about how he's feeling or what he's up to, it's the hold the phone has. Ridiculous!

I sent a message earlier checking arrangements for tonight. He's been away this weekend, which hasn't bothered me at all, he's called everyday, but now I feel on edge waiting for a reply.

OP posts:
Wishingplenty · 28/04/2025 12:56

If you are not a teenager, then there is absolutely no reason to feel like this.

thecatneuterer · 28/04/2025 14:56

Do you know anyone who has a spare grip you might be able to borrow? 😁

Batteredtoe · 28/04/2025 14:58

thecatneuterer · 28/04/2025 14:56

Do you know anyone who has a spare grip you might be able to borrow? 😁

I know, that's exactly what I need.

It's the phone, it does strange things to our brains (or my brain?). I'm not an anxious person, I guess it's the dopamine thing.

OP posts:

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Crunchymum · 28/04/2025 15:55

Did he reply?

Batteredtoe · 28/04/2025 15:59

Crunchymum · 28/04/2025 15:55

Did he reply?

Of course he did 🙂

OP posts:
shivermetimbers77 · 28/04/2025 16:06

I think this is pretty common in the beginning phase of a relationship.. if it doesn’t calm down then it might indicate some issues with relationship/attachment anxiety, but for the most part this is common and will improve over time as you settle into the dynamic . I don’t think it’s just to do with mobiles as I remember people being like this with old style phones, waiting around for a call back .. there’s a reason Blondie had a song called ‘Hanging on the Telephone’!

Crunchymum · 28/04/2025 16:32

Batteredtoe · 28/04/2025 15:59

Of course he did 🙂

Phew 😃

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