Can I have your ideas for how I fill up DS (10)?

[MadameSzyszkoBohusz]

Feeling very guilty as he told DH last night, while I was out, that he’s always still hungry after dinner!

He’s had the same sized portions as me, DH and DD (13) for a while now, so it hadn’t occurred to me it might not be filling him up! Last night we had a tuna steak each, topped with some pesto and a few prawns, and served with green beans, half a corn cob and some new potatoes crushed with garlic and olive oil. He had a bowl of fruit (strawberries, grapes and bananas) afterwards.

This seems like plenty to me, but I am aware from reading on here that older kids can be bottomless pits for food. I try to make healthy meals with plenty of veg, and a balance of meat, fish and vegetarian food (the night before last was a chickpea curry, before that was chilli con carne).

He’s quite tall (5’1) and slim bordering on skinny. I’m thinking last night I could have done him more potatoes (think we had about 4 each), and put some yoghurt on his fruit. He usually has a snack after school (at the moment he likes potato waffles, sometimes it’s hummus and breadsticks), and is allowed chocolate or sweets after dinner 3 times a week.

Do I increase his portion sizes overall or just allow him more snacks? He’s allowed free access to milk and to the fruit bowl but is expected to ask if he wants anything else - but would almost always be allowed, as long as he wasn’t having too much junk food, or wanting to eat to delay his bedtime (he has form for this!)

I don’t think I’m controlling with food, but it is important to me that the family eats healthily.

I really don’t have much context for this, I’m an only child to a single mum so have never lived with a growing boy before! Hate to think I’m under feeding him. 😕

Can you let him plate up his own portion so he takes what he needs?

More snacks - large snack halfway between lunch and dinner then as you already do - dinner + fruit

Snacks in our house consist of boiled egg, crackers, fruit, cereal, yoghurt

Home made soup as a starter? Very cheap and easy to make if you use all frozen veg.
Crusty bread with meal.
Baked potatoes are more filling than boiled.
Definitely yoghurt with fruit or a more filling pudding like fruit crumble a couple of times a week.
Grandsons can eat for Britain, very sporty and always on the go. As long as they burn it off I don’t think you’re setting up bad habits for the future.

Ooh, boiled eggs are a good shout, he loves them, and I can keep them ready boiled in the fridge for him.

As for serving himself, he can, but I’d have to start cooking more to begin with, as I only make what I’ve been deeming “enough” for the four of us and dividing it pretty equally. And I can only make more of certain foods - last night I could definitely have made more veg and potatoes, but he couldn’t have had an extra tuna steaks, they’re too expensive!

More snacks when he’s hungry for them. But healthy ish ones like pitta & hummus, cheese & crackers, scrambled egg or beans on toast, bagel, homemade flapjacks, cereal wit fruit, full fat Greek yogurt with honey berries granola etc.

make sure he’s getting plenty of protein to fill him up,

my boys eat loads especially when they’re having growth spurts!

These are great ideas, and honestly I don’t think I’d have thought of them myself - I don’t eat bread, so wouldn’t think to serve it with the food, but DS would definitely enjoy it. And he loves soup!

At your DS age, my boys always had a bowl of cereal- like weetabix with fruit- before bed

Chicken drumsticks in the fridge as well.

Does he eat breakfast and lunch? If he’s coming home from school absolutely ravenous I can see him still being hungry after dinner. My boys have eggs or a breakfast wrap and eat it in the way to school but all my dc are awful at eating at school.
Grapes and breadsticks aren’t really filling. Omelettes, French toast, chicken legs might be better. Does he eat nuts? I upscale granola by adding extra nuts and seeds and have it with good (not 0%) yoghurt - very filling and quick.

I would make lots of extra carb filler, eg in your meal example, make double the quantity of the potatoes than you would normally, then see how much he eats when he's allowed free rein.
(You can meal plan for the leftovers eg potato salad, rice salad, for lunches etc)

I would do this for a couple of weeks at least until you can get an idea of what he needs to eat then you can re adjust the quantities you make.

They are huge eaters when they start to grow.

I don't think you need special snacks, bananas, toast, cereal is enough?

Yes just serve up more of everything, serve cheaper protein, and keep the tuna steaks forcspecial occasions!

DD is a skinny 11yo who is always hungry and this is a time when I think white carbs are absolutely fine to fill up on - they’re growing fast and she burns it off quickly. She likes a bowl of porridge or cereal (I buy plain ish stuff like weetabix and Rice Krispies) with milk and some double cream (oh to be a growing child again!), or bagel/crumpet/hot cross bun type things. She also likes yoghurt and granola and although she wouldn’t make it for herself, she likes a bowl of chopped up fruit with some nuts, so if I’m feeling nice I’ll make her that. I have to tell myself she’s a growing girl, she’s stick thin and needs the food.

4 new potatoes?? Sorry, your food sounds lovely but I’d be needing more than 4 new potatoes and I’m not growing. Agree you don’t need special food. Bread and butter, some cheese on oatcakes, bowl of porridge- whatever.
My kids never ate much at school, would come home and make cheese on toast or something, eat their tea and have supper as well. Neither were tall and both were skinny ( still are)

He doesn’t eat much at breakfast, usually just a bowl of cereal, or a couple of slices of toast. He doesn’t seem to be as hungry in the mornings, which I can understand , I prefer a later breakfast myself and don’t enjoy eating first thing.

He usually has the school meals, but has lately started taking packed lunches a couple of times a week on the days where he really doesn’t like the menu choices. Tbh I’ve been struggling to know what to put in them that complies with the school rules of no chocolate, sweets, crisps or nuts (obviously). But I can start adding an extra sandwich, at least, and maybe make some flapjack to go in them.

I suspect he’ll enjoy the range and availability of food once he gets to secondary school, DD speaks very highly of the food trucks there!

Yes I think I’d defaulted to assuming what is “enough” for me is enough for him, and it clearly isn’t!

My boys used to have huge breakfasts.....cereal and cooked when I wasn't working.
They take what I consider to be 2 packed lunches into school.....so hot flask with soup or leftovers- chilli, spaghetti bol etc
Snack after school
Big tea.
I try to use cheaper protein so they can have more - so chicken or mince.
If I did tuna I would do them eggs with it.
I bulk out meals where I can - with extra veg or beans.
Once they've eaten their meal they can have toast or cereal.

They are all slim and healthy.

They also eat a gallon of peanut butter week....it's a side to porridge, yoghurt, pancakes, sandwiches....etc

Ooh, flask of soup in his packed lunch, great shout! He’ll love that.

My son is the same age and at risk of losing weight, so I always have lots of calorie dense snacks available - cheese and crackers, shortbread biscuits, wholemeal digestives with peanut butter. He’s very skinny, often has second portions at dinner, and usually an extra bowl of porridge / cereal or a couple of slices of toast and peanut butter as an extra “supper” meal before bed!

The portions you describe seem very small for growing children!

4 new potatoes doesn't sound a lot.

It's extraordinary the amount of food growing lads eat, often a lot of it is carbs as they need the energy.

Let him choose his food more, allow him develop his intuitive eating skills and give his body what he needs.

And prepare yourself op for carb snacks, more carbs with meals, more meals altogether!

These are all good points, I’m taking them on board. I suppose DD has lulled me in a false sense of security - she rarely wants anything extra between or after meals.

At 13 your DD has prob done most of her growing already, especially if she has already started her periods. Boys need a lot of extra nutrition from 10-14 as that’s when they grow the most!

It seems to have fallen out of fashion these days, but my late DM always used to put a plate of bread & butter on the table for people to fill up.

So did my grandma, I’d forgotten!

Hadn’t occurred to me about DD having done most of her growing, but she probably has - she’s about 5’7.

Girls have a couple of growth spurts after they start their period, it can be surprising when they're suddenly hungry and wanting more food again!