WWYD antisocial children that are not mine

[Berrytea]

I live in a deprived area. But it’s still a nice place to live, it’s a seaside town. There are aggressive primary school aged children who are free to roam around wherever they want in groups without a parent. They get into trouble, destroy property and shout abuse. They even turn against each other and go off into their own little groups. It is highly distressing to see or listen to especially because of my own background. children like these are often posted on the local facebook page for getting into trouble and usually when they get older they end up doing something really serious and go to prison.
I am disabled and can’t get out much. there are green spaces with trees that I like to go to and sit in but these children have started noticing and trying to provoke me and I really want nothing to do with them. They are persistent. So far I have been ignoring them or telling them to go away. and I’m not sure what I can do or say that will work to make them stop?

What kind of thing are the children saying to you? I would tend to ignore it myself but I notice when people do approach these kids in a reasonable way they often just leave. And a group of teens were hanging around outside my old house and one day I asked would they not because they were waking up my baby and they just moved! There was me thinking they were tough.

Maybe try and approach it from a different place in your mind a bit. Not all these kids are going to do something serious and go to prison.

They call me things like “Fanny” and shout at me telling me I must think I’m cool because I wear a dress or something stupid. To be honest I don’t really listen to exactly what they are saying but I think they are trying to instigate a fight

It’s kind of harmless stuff so. They are just being rowdy and obnoxious. If you ignore them do they hang around and persist ? Or do they continue?

Is it the same bunch every time?

I’ve tried to give a picture of what they’re like, I’m not exaggerating. They can also get physical. I feel intimidated by these children and i think you’re downplaying it because they’re children.

Are they getting physical with you?

I’m so sorry that you think that. I am not downplaying it at all. I was only encouraging you to look at it from a different perspective. Many times these kids all all mouth. I’ve worked with young adults who are much the same.

I completely understand that you feel intimidated. Many people find groups of kids intimidating. There isn’t an awful lot you can do. If ignoring them doesn’t help. You could try saying something like hey lads, I really need a bit of peace and quiet so could you lay off?

I would not try to get into a row with them or shout stuff. They will find it hilarious and taunt you forever. They are looking for a reaction from the sounds of it.

It depends how intimidated you feel, but personally when confronted with groups of feral children, I try to find my teacher voice. You have to project a relative calm, almost boredom, inflected with menace, and make it clear that you don't care in the least about what they are saying to you.

"Shut up and take your bad language elsewhere unless you want the police visiting your parents and then you'll find out what trouble is", would be the sort of approach I'd take if pushed, but I'd try to ignore first.

I wouldn't confront them unless I had to and there were other people around.

Where I am, a teenage girl recently ripped a 7 year old girl off a swing in the park by her hair and stamped on her head while two boys filmed it. Then tried to attack the Nan who’d taken her there. I’ve witnessed young teenagers setting a garden shed on fire then posing for pictures in front of the fire engine. Teens wearing balaclavas dragging a screaming child (about 8/9 years old) along the street and onto the roundabout while the little boy screamed “Stop!” And “Help me!” Over and over. Called 999. Two police cars came quickly but they’d stashed the child in a house I could see from where I am, I told them. They went round the estate for a bit, the teenagers were running back and forth but didn’t even knock at the house before leaving. A couple of days ago teenage kids set a trap by slinging a rope between buildings. An elderly man on a bike smacked into it sustaining a severe eye injury and facial injuries. The kids around here are completely feral. They know they won’t get caught and they give no shits. Honestly it gets worse by the month. I worry for my DD having to come home from school to here. No option to move at all.

If there's a local youth club in the area I'd speak to their staff and see if there's anything they could do- potentially they could target those kids to divert them into more community friendly activities or put staff on in that area to do detached work with them. Ignoring and avoiding is the best method. Challenging them, especially if you're rude to them, will often just make you more interesting unfortunately. If they're violent or aggressive that's different and you should call police. If you're all living in social housing (or if their families area) you can also contact your social landlord and they might be able to fund work with them and give the parents a warning. I'd do it as anonymously as you can though.