Part time - 2, 3 or 4 days?

[Fauxdonkey]

I am trying to work out how many days to return on. I planned 3, this seems like the best of all worlds, but now I am well into mat leave that seems a lot.

We are not sending DC to nursery until 2-3 years old. Grandparents will be providing some childcare support a couple of days a week. DH will have 2 days off in the week which will vary each week (in lieu of working weekends).

Talk to me about your 0.4-0.8 working arrangements and what has felt easiest? Financially, I need to work, but my wage is basically just all our disposable income and savings.

I work 0.8. It’s enough to feel like a good long break (off Friday). I condense my hours so salary is the same.
Word of warning about GPs though, not sure about your circumstances but personally think a few days a week is a fair bit and they may agree but the reality is it can be exhausting for them. I found mine were a massive help from 1-2 years old but 2 years plus it got too much for them. As they get older they do need a bit more stimulation.

In my experience, working 4 days a week only worked if you did full/condensed hours like the previous poster. Otherwise I was expected to do my full time job still in the 4 days but obviously not being paid in full. I then changed to 3 days and it honestly felt like I was properly part time.

I'm now working 3 days worth of hours across 5 mornings to work around school hours. I could go back to full time now or shortly, but life /perimenopause has left me permanently wrecked so I'm sticking with the reduced hours for now.

I work 3 days and agree I think it’s the best of both worlds. To me, 4 days feels too much like full time and 2 days didn’t feel enough. 3, imo, feels like a nice balance.

For me it would depend on what i had hopes wise for progression and whether i was likely to go on mat leave again in a relatively short space of time. 2 days in my role would not be enough, when I did 3 days I still felt like i was chasing my tail i now do 0.7 over 4 days, working two long days and two half days. works really well for us and I feel like I'm part time but around enough to still have the same progression opportunities (i have three kids and it has taken me 7 years to work out what's best so see how you get on!)

Another flag tp be aware around reliance on grandparents - the baby stage is very different to the toddler phase, which you won't be far off once you are back from mat leave, so a few days may be too much. (may not be an issue but I know a lot of families, myself included, who had grandparents involved in childcare plans and it didn't work longterm.)

I think 3 days is best. I have worked 0.8 for years but essentially do the same job as when I was FT but get paid 20% less. My company doesn’t allow condensed hours.

I went back 0.6 (3 full days) which worked while at nursery. I changed it to same amount of hours but over 4 shorter days once he started school to fit with school hours better. Im lucky that my work are really flexible and were happy for me to change my days.

0.6 with Monday and Friday off.

It’s perfect (and I know I’m very lucky)

I went down to .8 in my teaching/middle management post. I regretted it. It felt like I was doing 5 days work in the space of 4 and losing money for the privilege. Other teachers of my acquaintance found the same.

I worked 4 days when DS was 1 year old, MIL had him 2 days and DH had him 2 days, although I still had 3 full days with him, I did miss him, but it was only a 10 month contract, with 2 weeks holiday at Xmas and Easter, which along with bank holidays and my own holiday wasn’t too bad. After this job I got one for 2 days as DH really needed to work weekdays rather than weekends and pay was more.

I agree with everyone else re 0.8.

I'd be 0.6 if I could afford it.

HOWEVER. Women who go pt don't often consider the impact on their future pension.

And not to be a negative nelly, but the impact on your personal finances should you split. Which of course nobody expects to do but does happen.

So, find a way to pay into your pension as if you were working ft, and tell DH that's non-negotiable.

Relying on grandparents help for your working days every week is quite risky, unless they live next door (and even then, still risky). They will likely see childcare as a nice thing to do around their holidays and hobbies, so will leave you in the lurch every now and then when they want to go and do their own thing.

It's all very well saying you won't use a nursery, but if you don't have formal childcare, you are going to struggle to work. I was idealistic like you until I realised how much more reliable paid formal childcare is - we ended up with two days a week nursery, me part time and flexible, and ad-hoc grandparents help (which they loved).

That's what I do and, having worked a variety of part time working patterns, it's definitely the best.

4 days is the worst.

2 days works well if you have a job that's easy to switch off from and the work is covered well on the other 3 days.

I always enjoyed 3 days, but with the days broken up to give more coverage across the week. Monday, Tuesday and Thursday worked well for me.

As PP have said, what are your plans for your job?

I work 3 days a week despite the fact that DS is 11 but I’m not ambitious for my job and it works for us as a family.

I worked 3 days a week when my children were younger and it worked really well, a nice balance between home and work. Now they are at school I do 4 and that's perfect as 1 day to do housework etc then the weekend with them.
Just a word of warning about your plan for your husband to work every weekend. Does he have to, or have you chosen this for children reasons? My husband worked most weekends when my children were young and I found it really lonely. There tends not to be any baby classes on a weekend and most of my friends were busy with their own families and reluctant to meet up so I was often at a loose end and found the days very long.

I find three days the perfect balance - I work Tues, Weds, Thurs.

Echoing others re re-considering using GPs. We do 1 full day 9-4 and two mornings at nursery with GPs doing the two afternoons. I wouldn't want DD with grandparents more than this. MIL would happily have DD a whole day but would give more screen time - in reality she is exhausted by about 3.30, she's mid 60s. My DF is early 70s often takes DD to the park or plays with her for hours but again 1 afternoon is about right. The mix of nursery and GPs works well and I never have to worry about being let down - GPs can swap or do two afternoons where needed.

In terms of work; 4 days you'll do the same job but have less time and less pay. 3 days is hard but I'm in enough to do good work and have managed a promotion since going back 2.5yrs ago. I really don't think I could do my job in 2 and would very much just be filling in odd bits. I'm pretty sure 2 days would be rejected if I asked tbh.

I do miss my full time wage but absolutely love my days off with DD.

Make sure to factor in what evenings weekend days you will get a rest - this has been the hardest thing. I'm either at work or with DD, and DH (working m-f), wants a break at the weekend. It can be hard for him not to see Mon & Fri as my 'days off'. I do yoga Monday evenings and some Wednesdays. And we split the Saturday so we each get half a day of quiet each. Sunday is then usually spent all together.

I went back to work on 2 days and now I work 3 days (due to change of job and there not really being any 2 day jobs advertised)
I miss 2 days & wish I could go back to that. I didn’t go back to work for financial reasons but financially 3 days does make a big difference compared to 2.

Three days works really well for us.

And radical idea - doesn’t always have to be consecutive days.

I do three and think it’s pretty perfect. In enough to feel part of the team and fulfilled yet still clearly part-time so not trying to cram 5 days of work into 4 if you did 4 days, but not working more than you’re in. I don’t want to ever increase now!

And I work Sunday, Monday, Friday so we’ve only ever needed childcare for Mon/Fri as DH is home on Sundays, so that has saved a lot of money and meant kids at home with me a bit more before 3 when they add a day (and I get a glorious whole day to myself!)